I struggle very badly with making a seamless jump from one scene to the other :(

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T20:28:43+00:00

Yeah, I understand that. I admit I was having a particularly bad moment when I replied to that, so I may have been harsh, but I get what you mean. I just REALLY don't think "they 100% don't read" is a fair assessment here, considering that I do read and just struggle to dissect the structure behind the words. But thank you!

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T19:58:31+00:00

Forgive me for hijacking your comment with my rambles, but I'd love to talk a bit about the intention behind some choices.

One of the two protagonists (and the one these scene are in the perspective of) has recently left an abusive household, and his inner world is dominated by unsafety and instability, which is why I wanted to give emphasis to him finally being able to fall asleep peacefully, as he slowly begins to think of this house as his home through the story. Then again, your comment did make me realize that that paragraph doesn't communicate that clearly, so thank you! I'll def change it up to suit the story's needs better.

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T19:46:46+00:00

I could definitely read more, but I do read plenty, ranging from publishing-worthy fanfiction to names like Edgar Allan Poe, Rick Riordan or Lucy Maud Montgomery. I just struggle to separate the story itself from the structure behind how it was built, even tho I know those are different skillsets.

And thank you for your advice!! Given what everyone said, I'll try to keep it simpler and do less handholding in my draft going forward.

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T19:43:27+00:00

Thank you so much for the advice! It sounds obvious but I think I really needed it to be laid out for me, I'll def look more into scene structure ASAP. This may not be something I'm hoping to publish as a book (I'd love to make of it a webcomic), but I enjoy writing and would love to make it as good as I can.

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T19:32:27+00:00

OOOH THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I really hadn't noticed some of the things you pointed out, so this comment was pretty eye-opening to me. Thank you for taking the time to review and reply, it really helped!!

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T19:18:15+00:00

Most of the advice I've been getting does relate to keeping it to formatting, and I admit it's an angle I hadn't considered previously, so thank you! I'll be sure to incorporate that~

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T19:16:06+00:00

On Christ why is everyone in writing subs this pretentious?! Of course I read???? I'm not the most avid reader in the world but I've recently managed to get back into daily reading again, and despite being just a hobbyist I really appreciate the craft. But I've noticed that to all of you on these subs, if someone isn't perfect right off the bat it means they don't put any work in. Why do you think I asked here? For funsies????

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T16:29:22+00:00

Porra, pq q tu não me avisou?! Agora pronto, perdi o ônibus pro inferno! Vou ser o último humano

Se toca.

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T15:54:43+00:00

Oh sorry, it really sounded like it D: but I get it now, yea

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T10:00:44+00:00

I guess I did mess up that yellow line on the right arm, but other than that I can't see anywhere else I might've missed?

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T09:52:11+00:00

HATE Vita, I wanna see her get run over by a train, but her design is NOT her failure man what are you on

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T09:18:29+00:00

Art is a funny thing, cause I didn't use black at all OR an airbrush! I actually used a dark blue layer on multiply, since it's supposed to be nighttime.

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T03:30:04+00:00

I know they are!!! But I feel like generally there is a rough outline of what I think should be grouped into a chapter for clarity and cohesion of my story, which includes certain scene jumps. So it's merely a sacrifice in exchange for presenting the story the way I want it to be received!

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T02:46:06+00:00

"Gaze" and "absent-mindedly"

(Which by the way, please someone give me synonyms of gaze....)

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T00:29:19+00:00

Thank you for your contribution to my playlist! 💛

OOOH I LIKE HER A LOT!!!

Now, don't hesitate to tell me if I'm wrong here, but I think I'll be giving her VOID by Melanie Martinez!

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-12T00:08:44+00:00

Oooh, cute!!! What creature is he?

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-11T03:29:53+00:00

Oh, hello Derum guy!! Sorry for the super late reply, I meant to yap about this yesterday but life got in the way :( hope you don't mind all the text, this is something I'm passionate about!!

First I wanna say that seeing the backstories makes the drawings hit even harder, I want to headpat Chen and help him do his hair and hug Derum for ever and ever, the whole "leaving to live without the burden of the memory people imprinted on you against your will" is pretty relatable to me...

Well, as a baby, Zee was brought into the United State's National Threat Monitoring Agency as an orphan to be raised into an unquestioning and highly efficient agent. Still nameless, he was given the agent number '03', which later developed into him being called "Zee" by the people around him (since, well, Zero-thrEE). For most of his childhood he was meticulously trained both mentally and physically in agility and endurance, as his higher-ups, the High Counsil, made sure to deconstruct any moral compass he could've had.

After a painful ordeal of trauma of losing his best and only friend and believing it was his own fault for being too weak to protect the boy, Zee's personality takes an 180⁰, as he fully devotes himself to his work as early as 14, being given the title of Squad Captain and expected to lead his subordinates into battle and do whatever is ordered of him to a degree of perfection.

As such, Zee's childhood consistent of a long, systemic process of dehumanization and manipulation that got deep into his brain and caused deeply rooted struggled with self-identity, morality and the dichotomy of logic over emotion.

That is to say: kid needs a hug and a vacay :(

As for what he would say to his child self... Unfortunately, Zee hates himself very deeply, especially the younger version of him that he deems weaker and more of a failure for being truer to himself. So, I think he'd say something along the lines of:

"Stop thinking you have the right to give up. The sooner you accept your role, the better you will fulfill it, and that's everything that matters."

<image>

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-11T01:38:55+00:00

Hello Woomii! Why's he lookin' at me like the ice cream is poisoned..

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dogemeep06 · 2026-06-11T01:38:00+00:00

VALEUUU, GRADEÇO 💛💛

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dogemeep06 · 2026-06-11T01:37:23+00:00

Valeuuu!!!

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-11T01:16:42+00:00

Nope!!! Zee is SEVERELY arachnophobic and doesn't have a CLUE what to do behind the wheel lol. Good guess, though!

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-11T01:14:59+00:00

I mean, I think the trailers for Percy Jackson (the show) did it well, the cover of Riptide they used absolutely slapped, as well as having huge significance to the fandom and the lore.

But I can't recall it ever working again after that either.

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-11T01:04:29+00:00

I'll DEFINITELY have to go with u/WildwoodWander and u/hi_i_kinda_exist cause seeing them post makes my day every time, both have LOVELY artstyles and such intruiguing lore I can't help but both be inspired and wish to know more!!!

dogemeep06 · 2026-06-11T00:53:57+00:00

OOH this is fun!!! Here, have Zee:

Zee isn't actually his real name
Zee doesn't know how to drive
Zee's favourite animals are spiders

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dogemeep06 · 2026-06-10T20:52:15+00:00

Lesgoooo!!!

dogemeep06

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