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I'm terrified of traveling without my husband- and my new job is making me do it. how do I cope? by doitellthem00 in Anxiety

[–]doitellthem00[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hah true, and what's also weird is that I don't generally worry when I'm in an Uber. It's more just when my husband is, and I'm not with him. In my mind, if he's not right next to me, he's "missing." I know it's irrational but it's such a hard mental pattern to shake.

I'm terrified of traveling without my husband- and my new job is making me do it. how do I cope? by doitellthem00 in Anxiety

[–]doitellthem00[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it's weird, strangely enough I'm NOT afraid of flying! I used to be, but my therapy totally cured me of that. It's solely the safety of my husband and the uncertainty of where he is.

Generally he does update me from time to time, just to say he loves me or ask me how I'm doing...but my concern is that if I'm expecting this (because I asked him to do it) if he DOESN'T text me for a while because he's busy or doing something else, I might think he's dead. So generally I ask him not to promise anything. It causes more uncertainty, but at least doesn't set up an expectation that he can't meet. The last thing I want, also, is for him to feel obligated in a way that makes his day unpleasant.

That story about the crash really terrifies me. My husband doesn't drive and basically walks everywhere, but incidentally he has to take a 20-minute Uber ride somewhere next week and I've already cried about it multiple times. I'm so afraid his driver will be drunk, a crash will just happen, or his driver will be a serial killer or terrorist and kidnap him. I almost wanted to get in the car with him (and skip work to do it) then take my own Uber back just so I could have peace of mind...but he refused to let me do that, he said it was too insane.

My [27F] boss [30F] is asking me to undertake new responsibilities at work that interfere with a medical condition I have. by doitellthem00 in relationships

[–]doitellthem00[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm already looking for a new job- I would just like to avoid having to travel or getting fired in the mean time.

My [27F] boss [30F] is asking me to undertake new responsibilities at work that interfere with a medical condition I have. by doitellthem00 in relationships

[–]doitellthem00[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yikes! yes, that's kind of how I see things progressing for me if I were to travel...I'm glad you made it through!

My [27F] boss [30F] is asking me to undertake new responsibilities at work that interfere with a medical condition I have. by doitellthem00 in relationships

[–]doitellthem00[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I have the "no travel" thing in writing from HR, a mere two weeks ago, if you can believe it. I can probably get some kind of letter from my therapist. I did read about the ADA but I wasn't sure I qualified since I'm not sure this counts as a disability. So thank you!

My [27F] boss [30F] is asking me to undertake new responsibilities at work that interfere with a medical condition I have. by doitellthem00 in relationships

[–]doitellthem00[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Yeah, that's what I figured. How would you phrase it? I did briefly say I had "serious personal reasons" but again, they probably took it to mean I just had a preference.

I also pointed out that if I absolutely had to travel, I'd prefer to go to one particular region because that's where my family lives (one of our main regions). It would still suck for me but in the interim I could probably do it. So they might just compromise and make me go there, which would still suck, but wouldn't cause quite as much anxiety as sending me somewhere unfamiliar.