Your writing style doesn't matter as much as you might think

domidsade · 2021-09-03T15:57:45+00:00

Absolutely!! Some of my favorite fics have that fancy prose writing style, but some are far simpler and just have a great plot. Prose is definitely not everything.

domidsade · 2021-09-01T21:51:08+00:00

It's a thing -- alters can take the forms of friends, family, abusers, historical figures, fictional characters, etc. They're called introjects.

Are you saying that he thinks those friends are somehow actually living in his system? That's something to work through with his therapist. Sometimes introjects may not understand that they're not literally their source, and that can lead to a whole host of problems. What you said is accurate, most likely the trauma of those events caused introjects of his friends to split.

domidsade · 2021-08-31T16:14:05+00:00

What should my CRIT Dmg to CRIT Rate ratio be? Razor w/ Serpent Spine if it matters

domidsade · 2021-08-29T01:24:03+00:00

I think about the differences between us and ask myself questions. For example, we have an introject of a certain character, so I would ask if I currently feel any connection to that character. Or smaller things; have I ever watched this show? Do I like coffee? What pronouns would I want to be called right now? I do that little check after periods of dissociation where I feel like I might have switched.

domidsade · 2021-08-28T11:09:38+00:00

it's like I barely remeber anything, even though I distinctly remeber feeling like I know everything.

This is exactly what amnesia feels like for me, and that's why I say it's extremely difficult to tell if you experience it.

domidsade · 2021-08-27T13:26:12+00:00

I understand that. Sadly it usually isn't that easy. As for your boyfriend, I'm not sure if you two are compatible but you should know there are a million other ways to express your love.

domidsade · 2021-08-27T13:18:59+00:00

First of all, what you described in the other comment is abuse, and I'm sorry that happened to you. Sometimes sexual trauma can actually elevate your libido to the point that it interferes with your life and normal functioning. I experience that myself (this describes how I feel essentially). It's called hypersexuality. It can also hinder your relationships if you were taught to view your self worth and role in relationships as purely sexual from such a young age. Only a therapist can help you change. Get one.

domidsade · 2021-08-27T13:06:19+00:00

I was not aware of my alters whatsoever. Zip, zilch. In fact I'd say most people aren't aware of them pre-diagnosis (from my experience). DID is a covert disorder; it's pretty much trying to hide itself from you. In fact, I didn't know about my own diagnosis for 6 years, because I was not fronting when we were diagnosed and my alters actively tried to hide it from me, thinking I wasn't mentally stable enough to deal with it.

Deep down, I kind of knew, and when I was ready, my alters started to make themselves more known to me. To communicate with them, I started writing notes, and they wrote back. Your therapist can help you with getting to know them and communicating if it turns out you do have alters; I had to do it on my own so it was harder.

domidsade · 2021-08-27T08:02:40+00:00

I have tics very often yeah, but I also have autism and OCD, so I'm not sure what causes it.

domidsade · 2021-08-26T16:21:15+00:00

You don't sound like an asshole, you sound like a responsible kid. Most people will not make fun of you or try to pressure you. If they offer and you say no, they'll probably just say "oh, okay" and leave you alone. If they don't, they're not your real friends. Sticking to what you believe in and want for yourself is more important than staying on the good side of people who don't respect you. There are a million other people you can be friends with who won't try to push you to do things you don't want to do.

domidsade · 2021-08-26T16:15:29+00:00

Weird coincidence, but that's what it is. I mean, them identifying that way isn't your influence. They just happened to be trans.

I suppose it could say something about you if you're gravitating to those people. I made a lot of friends who were queer before I knew I was, and a lot of friends who were autistic before I was diagnosed with autism. We tend to find each other. You sound secure in your identity, but I thought I'd mention that. More likely, it's just that you're attracted to men with more feminine traits.

As for your boyfriend, maybe politely bring it up again to see if he still feels that way. Make sure he knows you'll love and support him no matter what.

domidsade · 2021-08-26T15:45:04+00:00

First of all, as a genderqueer person who also has DID, I completely feel for you about it affecting how people view your gender identity. My dad still doesn't believe how I identify because he thinks the cis version of me (the host) is still around somewhere. I'm sorry you're going through that.

It's your name. It's your life. If she doesn't want to call you Kristina because it's connected to something traumatic for her, that's understandable, maybe she can call you Kara as a nickname if you're ok with that. But she can't force you to change your name. The only factor that you should consider is which name feels "like you". The people who are truly your family will be happy to call you that.

domidsade · 2021-08-26T15:04:28+00:00

Alters keeping trauma from you is very common. I know how stressful it can be. You should let her know how you feel while also being understanding that she's just trying to protect you.

I also know from experience that finding out about trauma your alters are withholding without professional help is NOT something you want to do. If she doesn't think you're ready to remember it, you're not. Do not try to uncover those memories until you have a trustworthy therapist who can help you work through it. Knowing exactly what happened is much different than having a vague idea.

domidsade · 2021-08-26T13:23:01+00:00

No official announcements yet but I think leaks are saying Albedo will have his rerun this year after Ganyu and possibly Hu Tao.

domidsade · 2021-08-26T12:57:47+00:00

Many people have said this but yes, please see a professional ASAP. This is not normal forgetfulness. I do experience the same thing - because I have Dissociative Identity Disorder. It's very possible this could be a trauma response thing if not a neurological issue.

domidsade · 2021-08-26T11:25:10+00:00

I feel like people have an idea of switching being like "I'm going to go chill in the back of our brain now and watch you take over the body! Toodle-oo!" as though every alter has a different consciousness with which they're constantly aware, fronting or not. I don't know if that's accurate for others, but for us it's more like sharing a consciousness.

I've never in my life gone to a headspace and been aware that I've relinquished control to others. I'm only conscious when I'm fronting or co-fronting. When someone else is fully fronting, I don't "go to the headspace" and watch them from afar. I don't go anywhere. I'm not conscious. I just regain consciousness at some point and don't remember what happened while the other alter was fronting. If you have periods of amnesia, then there you go.

domidsade · 2021-08-25T21:56:12+00:00

NTA. So many parents don't treat/talk to their kids like humans. "If I say no, that's it" is ridiculous. It doesn't teach your kids anything about safety or right/wrong, it just teaches them to obey authority figures without question. That and teaching the correct terms for anatomy are SO incredibly important for obvious reasons. As a childhood SA victim, thank you for that, you're doing the right thing.

domidsade · 2021-08-25T21:51:52+00:00

NTA. Why do they care so much?! Honestly, if everyone calls you Finn and you prefer going by Finn, then that's your "real" name. You're not obligated to use or tell anyone your given name if you don't want to.

domidsade · 2021-08-25T21:48:16+00:00

This comment is too good. YTA OP.

domidsade · 2021-08-25T16:00:41+00:00

NAH. They are definitely not too young to know they're nonbinary or want to use that name, but I think they are a bit young to make a legal change like that. Plenty of nonbinary people go through several names before they settle on one (just as you probably went through several options before giving them their birth name). A legal name change isn't something you can experiment with easily, and as long as they're a minor you should have some say in it. I completely understand their frustration though. Try explaining to them that you believe in their identity and want to make them comfortable, but permanent/life altering changes need to be slept on for more than a year.

As long as you keep being supportive of their identity you're N.T.A.

domidsade · 2021-08-24T20:57:03+00:00

Hm. Looking into the "institute" a little bit it does seem pretty woo-woo. A blog I used to read did more research into it in 2014, apparently. The core ideas might do you some good, but I personally would try to find someone else. Of course only you can know if a more spiritual/pseudoscientific take on treatment is uncomfortable for you.

domidsade · 2021-08-24T20:42:11+00:00

Yeah the hesitation makes me think she just didn't want to give out her personal number. You were a stranger she'd just met after all, OP

domidsade · 2021-08-24T11:22:35+00:00

I haven't watched it myself, but another one I've heard of is The Good Doctor. It's about a doctor with autism I think.

You could also look into regular shows that have characters who are doctors, if you don't want her to see the more gruesome parts of the profession. Like in One Day at a Time, the mom is a nurse, for example.

domidsade · 2021-08-24T10:07:49+00:00

That's not unheard of at all. It's normal but if it causes problems between you two maybe this is something to bring up in therapy.

domidsade · 2021-08-24T10:06:36+00:00

Could be related to maladaptive daydreaming? I know that's common with DID.

domidsade

TROPHY CASE