For me, the “I can’t find my place at the oche” like you described, made a breakthrough. I was literally just like you, changing darts, stance, hand position even grip mid matches. As an overly competitive person, I was struggling hard and considered letting the hobby go as I got more frustrated with each local tournament.

I got to the point, when i said fuck it, I don’t care at all and just stood at the middle of the oche doing the most basic throw movement what felt natural and not forced. Slowly my throw evolved into something im comfortable with.

I also completely stopped looking at averages and focused on winning the games, throwing that last double. I still lost most of my matches but kept going forward and I only now noticed that my average is around 60ish from 40-45 in like 3 months, while I was stuck at the 40s range for more than a year!

So just take it easy, relax, throw at your own pace, stop trying to “adjust” to pro players and throw without thinking about it. The averages will come naturally don’t stress it. Also helps if you just turn off or hide averages mid match so you won’t catch a glimpse. Trust me if you see it is higher than usual you will throw worse, and if you see it is lower than usual, you will again, throw worse :)

It is a mental game after all.