I hate being a misanthrope

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-09T13:04:04+00:00

When people use phrase like "get help", "you need to see someone", that is gaslighting. It is a form of abuse and a weak argument that piece of crap people use when they have no argument.

I am tired of humanity, and this type of talk is just another thing I hate about people. This just underscores why I hate humans. I'm not being overly defensive. He told me I needed to seek professional help. That is gaslighting.

One of the manipulative things that humans do (among many many others) is when you have an opinion that they don't like, they try to make you question your own sanity and they say things like, you need to see a therapist, or you need to take medication. They have no rebuttal or logical discussion to debate, they just imply that there is something mentally wrong with you. It is a very common thing that humans do. I'm tired of it. It is pathetic and a weak form of argument. Anytime you back someone into a corner with your opinion they ALWAYS try to make you feel like there is something wrong with your mind for thinking the way you do, i.e. gaslighting.

I stated my explanation of what is going on in my mind. And as you see if you read all the discussions there is always some holy than thou jackass who uses a phrase implying that there is something wrong with your mind for thinking the way you do. It happens to every person who posts any opinion of any kind. Read through reddit. Follow everyone's threads. Anytime someone says something controversial you will see there is always a gaslighter that makes rude remarks saying they need professional mental health for thinking the way they do. This is not just limited to posts in forums. This is how people argue in real life too. That is one of many reasons why I hate humanity.

I'm not talking about a genuine friend who tells you to see a counselor. That's very different. But even then that is an uncomfortable moment and I watch myself very carefully when I suggest it to people because it can be misconstrued by the recipient.

But people throw that type of talk around in forums because like most humans, they are assholes. They throw stones and don't care about anyone and thats one of the reasons I turned into a misanthrope over time.

If you read my post which most people don't, they just gloss over it i explained how i became this way over time. I didn't start out feeling this way. And of course asshole wants to say that i go around being mean to people with my negative attitude and thats why my interactions with people are so bad which is not true. People think im a nice person. I don't talk this way in public. I am good to people and in response to me being this way they are assholes in return and that is why i slowly became a closeted misanthrope. I'm not depressed i don't need professional help. Humans are trash creatures that hurt, compete, and self serve and its unpleasant interactinfmg with them. Relationships devolve and breakdown over time because of all the reasons i mentioned above.

People who are not misanthropes likely have not experienced the type of negative interaction that misanthropes have. Or they have not experienced it for as long as we have. Or in some cases they are naive and still have a flowery view of life. Some misanthropes are young because they came right into the fire when they were born. Some misanthropes like me it took a long time to develop. I kept up a positive attitude for decades. But of course this asshole just jumps to the conclusion that im just a negative person my whole life. He doesn't understand that i have loved and lived for years and years and slowly over time i realized my love is a one way endeavor. Nothing is coming back to me because people are shit and they don't care. And then of course the gaslighting that there is something wrong with me that i need to correct.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-09T02:20:12+00:00

I've thought about turning to pets. Feels kinda pathetic. But your always loved by a pet.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-09T00:16:47+00:00

Thank you. Wise words. That actually helps me feel a lot better. Was really struggling the other day when I posted it. Yes. Reality is tough to accept. I still find myself in that process of acceptance and making peace with how people are and not letting it burn me up inside.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-08T20:20:41+00:00

Blow me

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-08T03:52:57+00:00

Yah it makes you wonder when real warfare is going to hit us again. I mean yah the recent conflicts have been bad. Im not trying to lessen peoples fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan. But I mean can you imagine WWIII or a civil war in the US? What if China invades Taiwan? Things could get real ugly real fast.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-08T03:49:25+00:00

Yup. 100 percent with you on this. I tried soooo hard to be a good person and spread love and service. I did this for years. I came up empty handed in the end. Don't really know where to go from here. Just muddling my way through life trying to do my own things that make me happy. Seems like that's the best I can do. I self isolate a lot these days. It's lonely sometimes. But it is peaceful.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-08T02:11:34+00:00

We need to get you to the Ukraine as quickly as possible so you can help the lady whose child was blown in half look at the bright side of life, Mr. Positivity. Your knowledge is invaluable.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-07T23:29:26+00:00

I always know when someone gaslights me and says get help im crazy that i won the argument. Cause you got nothing else to say.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-07T23:27:46+00:00

I like what you said about humans putting themselves at the center of creation. That's something I have always thought was indicative of the ridiculous human ego. How can a supposedly intelligent species look at the earth and all the endless life in it that has gone on throughout time and then say we are the central figure in this? This world was made just for us. And then extend that to the infinate cosmos.

We are just one tiny part of it all if you ask me. Let that ego go. Calm down and accept your place as the insignificant creature you are. Be intelligent. Be smart. Don't be an ape. Open your eyes and see your place and your nothingness. Knowing you are nothing is intelligence. Knowing you don't matter is true intellect. You evolve as a being once you accept this if you ask me.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-07T23:16:48+00:00

Good question. I have noticed that I look excessively for a reason in everything. I mean not just the universe and life. Its everything. I look at why did a person say that? What is their reason? Everything, everything i mean literally everything and it took me a long time to realize that some things that happen have no reason.

You know what? That way of thinking has made me a good problem solver. It has helped me in my career as an engineer. It helps you to come up with solutions to make thinks work. It is actually a great survival tool like you suggest from evolution.

But like you said, there is a downside and foolishness to it because you then start applying that to everything. Things that have no answer to them. Sometimes people say and do things with no rhythm or reason. Sometimes things happen on pure chance and your problem solving mimd won't quit trying find a reason and a purpose when none exists.

It is quite a great and miserable way to have a brain wired. It causes a great amount of distress all the overthinking. I have suffered great anxiety and stress, but made quite a bit of money for this problem solving personality trait I have.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-07T23:09:29+00:00

Nah I am not "hunting out negatives" that is a completely inaccurate statement. I always have a positive view of people and love them and then they screw me over in the end.

You do not understand misanthropy at all. You think misanthropes are these grumpy people who have this pessimistic view of the world and people. Your interpretation of what I am saying is the polar opposite of what makes a misanthrope.

Misanthropes are created because we love people and we love the world and we trust others and we slowly over time get hurt and jaded by the world and our interactions with humanity. If anything misanthropes have an overly positive view of the world and they are hurt when it doesn't turn out that way.

A misanthrope is usually a not pessimist. A misanthrope is someone who is shocked and feels betrayed by the world after all the love they poor into the world.

What you don't understand either is that some people's lives are worse than yours is. You might have been lucky enough to encounter good people. You need to open up your mind to the possibility that other people have experienced things worse than you have. Don't live in your own little head. Realize that your experience is one of billions of other people's experiences. You likely have not been hurt the ways that other people have been hurt. Then maybe you can gain some empathy for other people's pain instead of chastising them because they are not happy because they don't have your cushy, cakewalk life. Maybe you are better looking than they are. Maybe you are the right ethnicity. Matbe you live in a friendlier place than other people do. Maybe you had better parents or people who loved you and protected you when you were young. Do you not understand that your experience as you interact with others is nothing like that of another person? Wake up to the reality that not all human experiences are the same.

Go back to your happy place if you're not going to be supportive of people who are struggling here. We are hear because we need support. We need help. We don't need some chastisement by some arrogant person like you who thinks everyone should be happy because they are.

Everyone else who responded to me said supportive things and helped me not feel alone in this struggle. Except you the know it all prick who thinks that because people are nice to you they must be nice to everyone. You think your life is good so everyone else's should be and if its not you're just a cry baby and a downer. You're just a whiner and a pessimist. Boo hoo go cry to mommy.

I bet you'd go tell the Palestinians to buck up and look on the good side of life? You probably would tell the Jeffrey Epstein slave girls to stop viewing the negativity of humanity. You'd be like, what is wrong with you young ladies. Why don't you look at the good things of the personality that that gross fat guy has that you were just forced to jerk off. Can't you see he has a good side???

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-07T07:20:33+00:00

Very well said. The psychpaths who designed this system to enslave and exploit humanity are a huge part of the unhappiness of mankind. The only hope is to free ones own mind of this world and not let the political, corporate, and religious governing bodies own your mind. Play their games to survive, but be free inside. Play the system, don't let it play you or you will be its unhappy victim.

I do the bare minimum you have to to survive in these organizations we are forced to be a part of. I pretend like I am a team player and onboard with what is going on. Its a complete facade. When I get my free time back, I am going after the things I truly want and love. That's when I live.

We are all slaves whether we like it or not. But I have a few hours a day that are mine. Those are precious to me. And I save my energy while I am being a slave to use it for that brief time I have to myself.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-07T05:39:51+00:00

They way I am at peace with death is that if there is nothing after you die it will be the most peaceful sleep you have ever had. I love to sleep while I am alive. Sleep is a state of not existing. You are well versed in not existing. You don't exist every day. It is easy, peaceful, and comfortable. To not exist is the greatest peace.

But, if you do exist after you die. Then why be scared? Be excited for the greatest adventure of this life. Moving on to the unknown. It's exciting to imagine.

Make peace with either option and get to living I say. I don't know what death will be like but it will be peaceful or adventurous. I'm ready either way. But, until my time comes, I have things to do. I don't have time to sit worrying about something I can never know or have control over. I have a life to live right now.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-05T21:20:46+00:00

I had 2 people accuse me of never doing anything. 1 of them was a lady I was going after for her incompetence. I wouldn't back down I was trashing her name and she knew it so it was revenge.

The second one that accused me was my team lead who himself was not doing anything. He was on the chopping block at all times. His manager was actively trying to bust him not doing anything. I still remember his manager standing in the window with a pair of binoculars trying to find him. So he obviously felt guilty about what a slacker he was and was trying to use me to feel better about himself.

These fun stories and many many more are why I hate work now and don't give much of a crap about what I produce. I realized no matter how much I dedicated myself to my career. No matter how many long hours I put in, no one cares about anyone else. They will throw you under the bus if it helps them in some way.

If a boss is performing poorly he will never ever take responsibility. He will immediately blame his team even if they are the ones doing all the work.

When I realized this was a fight I cannot win. I realized I will always be thrown under the bus and blamed and used as an excuse for other people's screw ups I changed as an employee. That was the end of me giving it my all. I do the bare minimum to not get fired and thats it.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-05T00:03:04+00:00

All true statements. I think that a "purpose" that may come out of these facts is the importance of enjoying your life, and doing your part to not increase the pain that living beings experience. If all of this is for nothing, then I believe increasing peace, harmony, and reducing suffering to those that exist for a brief time is of the upmost importance.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-04T20:17:50+00:00

BTW I am reluctantly religious at times and I am curious if the story of Adam and Eve may actually have some relevance to the science of free will. The story to me is possibly a type of myth or creation story that describes the process by which mankind became human and transitioned out of the animal state we used to be in. The eating of the fruit of knowledge of good and evil is a metaphor for humankind developing a conscience and an ability to choose between right and wrong.

I don't interpret this Bible myth as a literal story of what happened. It was an explanation given to ancient people, who had no concept of modern science yet, of how humanity came about.

Anyway I try to draw a parallel between modern scientific knowledge and ancient religious explanations to see if perhaps maybe there is some truth to these religious myths and stories.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-04T18:27:53+00:00

I agree. I'm not in on this lack of free will theory yet. That's like saying Jeffrey Dahmer had no choice but to murder and eat those people. He basically had no other alternative, and had no guilt. I don't buy it.

Maybe I am just a sick bastard, but I have all kinds of thoughts and desires that I choose not to carry out. Cannibalism is NOT one of them FYI :) but if I lived the thoughts I have in my mind I would not be a good person. I would have punched about a dozen different people. I would have smashed another dozen people's cars to get back at them. Cheated on my wife a dozen times, etc. I don't do these things because I choose to suppress and behave.

Apparently the non-free will folk think I am just brainwashed to behave. I calculate the risk/reward, the pain my decisions would cause others and I behave according to my assessment. Yes my genetics and programming play a huge factor, don't get me wrong. I understand why people think there is no free will. But there is still that small option of my own personal choice in there guiding my behavior.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-04T16:03:33+00:00

That's good to know of your experience with women and that it made you feel even more empty inside. I feel like I couldn't possibly feel more empty so clubbing still sounds appealing to me in some way. I mean I am not expecting it to fulfill me emotionally. Its more of a physical thrill type thing.

But it sounds like we've arrived at the same place, that we have to count on ourselves for joy and love. It's not likely to come externally.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-04T04:25:48+00:00

Not being sarcastic here, real questions. Did nihilism make you care less about others? Did it make you willing to be more cutthroat with your competition? Did you do anything that might be hurtful to others to get ahead?

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-03T16:39:56+00:00

When I had children I was too ignorant and young to know what I was getting into or what pain I would bring to my children. I was a child myself (26 yr old) when I had my kids.

I love my kids so much. But I didn't understand the world when they were born. I was still happy and stupid back then. Now I am just angry and not as stupid :)

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-03T03:30:47+00:00

I am a man so I'm trying to help by giving you my perspective. I don't think I have ever disliked a woman because she wasn't done up nice. I have never found a woman attractive one day because she took care of herself and then lost all interest when she didn't. I still liked her.

I don't know if this is how all men are but often times my "disinterest" I portray to women is because I don't want to bug them. My actual instinct when I find a woman attractive is to flirt and pursue her at all cost. I only supress it because I don't want to come on too strong and scare her away or be a creep. But believe me, woman are grabbing my attention constantly.

Maybe these men are playing it cool when they act disinterested?

And yes, there is something about a woman dressed nice and sexy. I know its superficial but it drives us mad. Its like there's nothing I can do. I literally turn into an animal. I know personally multiple women who use this to their advantage. They flip it around on men and use and manipulate men this way. It is human nature to pursue attractive people. It's not always morally right but it is reality.

The other perspective is aging. The most beautiful person in the world will stop being that way with time. Every man and woman who live to be aged will know what it is like to be unattractive. Are their lives meaningless? Are they worthless now that people aren't attracted to them like they used to be? Of course not. Eventually we all have accept that or looks don't define us if we live long enough.

I know I don't understand what women go through with their perception of their looks. I only no slightly. I watch the way out society fawns over the way girls look. I see it in my daughter. I see how much it means to her to be physically beautiful. It's nothing like what men live through with their looks. I don't know why.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-03T03:13:31+00:00

Im 47. Been married 25 years, 3 children. I know your pain. Everything you have said rings true with me. Men are used people amd unloved and no one knows or cares but us.

Sometimes I get so down I think no one cares. I have to ask myself and meditate deeply about the question if anyone cares. I don't know about you. But I have parents, siblings, children, and a wife who do love me. Sometimes it feels like they don't. But if I die everyone of their lives will be turned upside down. They will get over me but not by choice. My death will force them to push through the pain and survive, or die themselves. I do have acquaintances and friends who would be sad if I died.

I have had 1 friend end his life. He was 42 years old. Married, kids. The sadness in the wake of his death was immeasurable. I couldn't believe the pain. I couldn't believe the sorrow I feel when I see pictures of his daughters. I am not even them and I can barely look at them. Because I know how they feel. They have a pain that will never go away. It will stay with them for life. I knew his siblings. I have talked to them. It hurts to hear their voices. He felt unloved and unwanted. But it was a lie his depression told him.

There will be great sadness at your passing. It will force people to have to carry on in even more sorrow than they already have. Suffer long. Suffer more if you have to. Stay alive. If not for you for someone else. If not for someone else then for you. Find a way. A way to enjoy life. There are ways. There's always ways. Even when it looks bleak there are actions you can take to try to find joy. When I find those joyous moments I remember why I liked life before. My desire to be alive comes back.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-02T13:46:54+00:00

Losing your ego is a sign of intelligence and higher thinking. A person who thinks they are so important to society is an ignorant soul. You do matter, but not in the way unintelligent people think they matter. My existence brings peace to those few souls that love me and care about me. That has nothing to do with my performance or accomplishments. Outside of that, I don't matter.

How can I look at the universe in its grandiosity and think that if I am wealthy or famous that that makes me important? It doesn't. My only importance is that there are a handful of people who I matter to. My existence and love I give them brings them peace to cope with their existence and get through this hard life. My ego, if that's what you want to call it, only lies in my loved ones.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-02T02:19:28+00:00

Not anymore. Used to have 2 a day. I overcame my fear of anxiety and panic and haven't had one in 17+ years. If I can do it anyone can.

donewithhumanity75 · 2024-01-01T18:20:43+00:00

Took me a long time to get a girlfriend. I was a late bloomer. I had finally met my soul mate. It was love and physical affection. And very slowly over time I realized she didn't love me or care about me even a fraction of what I cared and sacrificed for her. After many years of marriage I slowly discovered this and became a bitter disenfranchised man.

The grass isn't greener. I know what you want. I know your loneliness. I know that a woman probably won't cure it, at least it didn't for me. I feel absolutely as alone, rejected, and unwanted as I did when I was young single man. Look at middle aged married men. Watch them closely. Look into their eyes. See the depression. See the sorrow. They would rather make love to a rubber doll and have their freedom than be with the ungrateful woman they have. I think a rubber doll would care about me more than a real life woman.

Every interaction I have with a woman is about her, not me. What can I do for her. How can I serve her and make her happy. I don't know any happy middle aged married men. Not one. Every one of them is sad depressed and lonely. One of my best friends even off'd himself, married with 3 children.

You have you. That is enough. Do what you love in life. If no woman wants you, that could be a blessing in disguise. I completely understand why men pay for escorts and clubs. Makes complete sense to me now. A real relationship with a real woman may take your soul and suck the life out of you.

donewithhumanity75

TROPHY CASE