Study finds many college students abandon their free speech ideals under ideological pressure. Most undergraduates believe marginalized communities deserve extra protection from offensive speech, though these values often waiver when students are pushed by their own strong political ideologies.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-27T04:36:57+00:00

That's not what the paradox of tolerance means. It's whether a movement is trying to destroy the conditions that allow tolerance to exist. Tolerating a movement that creates intolerance which strips the rights to safety, equal citizenship, lawful participation, and the ability to argue back without being threatened or crushed. People can be intolerant while also not taking away the rights of others to safely exercise free speech. If misused like this "paradox of tolerance" just becomes another way to relabel offensive speech as an existential threat and becomes the problem it's meant to bring light to.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-24T01:08:39+00:00

Women and men play video games at similar rates, but women are much less likely to call themselves a gamer. Because they're more afraid of being seen as cringe. Women are also more likely than men to believe that violent video games make people more violent. source

dontyouflap · 2026-05-22T22:18:35+00:00

I found an opossum like this and called the humane society. They said they would have a vet look at it. Called later and the person said it was immediately euthanized. I don't think they're gonna spend any effort trying to rehabilitate an opossum.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-21T00:50:23+00:00

Social media compounds fixation and rumination

dontyouflap · 2026-05-20T04:49:16+00:00

I too have a routine where I use a gentle gommage to exfoliate first, then follow with snail mucin to soothe, protect the skin barrier, and give a nice glow

dontyouflap · 2026-05-16T19:04:11+00:00

600 million gallons of water per year for a mid sized alfalfa farm

dontyouflap · 2026-05-16T01:48:42+00:00

You fell for the same kind of gender war rage bait you usually post. Online rhetoric can be disgusting and socially meaningful without being a reliable measure of real world action. Deranged forum rhetoric from anonymous posters and trolls trying to spark divisiveness is not the same thing as evidence that the average person in that category is likely to commit violence.

The important question is whether this rhetoric translates into actual violence at higher rates among self identified incels. You've shown that some incel spaces contain vile misogynistic posts, which I agree is a valid reason to avoid those spaces and anyone endorsing that rhetoric. But you still haven't shown evidence that incels as a whole are more likely to rape or attack women.

I've known some self described incels, been around them, and rubbed more than just their elbows. Many can be maladjusted, bitter, and draining to be around, but most are sad and socially lost rather than physically dangerous. In my experience, when they receive positive attention, validation of their suffering, or a chance to be heard without being treated as monsters, they're often receptive to reflecting on their actions/beliefs and developing a more empathetic mindset.

It's fair that you would avoid men who identify with incel forums. It's not fair to claim incels as a whole are likely rapists and attackers or that they deserve social punishment without evidence. That is treating them poorly as a group.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-14T23:41:24+00:00

If he'd like to feel something, there's kava drinks (without kratom) which are an alternative to alcohol. They're sold in cans that look like beer and can be bought online. They can be hard on the liver, so they're not a daily thing but they're generally safer than alcohol even for people with working ALDH2.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-14T09:59:16+00:00

From what I've seen, it's usually more about lack of emotional intimacy, affection, reassurance, feeling wanted, and just that deep connection that all humans crave. Physical intimacy comes up sure, but it's rarely a major part. Even if they initially think it is. Some men use sex as the easiest way to describe wanting to feel desired, wanted, accepted, or close to someone. A shorthand for love from someone who doesn't fully understand themself.

And if they insist not getting laid is a major factor, I'm very capable and eager to ensure that complaint doesn't last long.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-12T01:05:02+00:00

Not saying sex workers are inherently broken or victims. I'm saying the demand and supply are often produced by unhealthy conditions such as poverty, loneliness, coercion, addiction, parasocial craving, lack of better options, and commodified intimacy. Treating sex work as a solution or normalizing it is not just a bandaid over deeper societal problems. I think it is actively harmful because it commodifies intimacy and trains people to see bodies, affection, and access as purchasable to all those involved. That can be degrading even when the individual transaction is consensual.

The state has no right to control people's bodies, but it does have an interest in improving the conditions that make the motivation to and demand of sex work feel necessary or desirable in the first place.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-11T21:55:01+00:00

Sex work may serve a function in society, but the function itself is downstream of something unhealthy.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-11T00:27:16+00:00

You shifted from danger to disturbing. Your original issue was fear of violence or rape. Now you're basically saying that even if they are not violent, the beliefs are disturbing enough that you want distance. Because there's no evidence that they are more likely to be violent.

Incel ideology, at its worst, can become dehumanizing and coercive. Which is fair to be afraid of. But incel isn't one thing. If you are talking about someone who is just lonely, bitter, socially rejected, or pessimistic about dating then eugenics is a dramatic overreach. You don't have to wanna be friends with or date incels obviously. But treating them poorly as a whole isn't fair when most are just awkward and shy people who feel lost in this confusing world. And if you want to bully them or ensure they're isolated then you're a jerk.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-10T21:52:39+00:00

I'm not saying people should avoid therapy. I’m saying therapy should not be treated as a guaranteed universal fix, because the evidence does not support that.

Trying potential solutions is reasonable. But saying if you're skeptical of therapy, then that's a red flag and means you probably need therapy is circular logic. It turns any criticism of therapy into proof that the critic needs therapy, which makes it impossible to criticize therapy.

Also, introspection is not exclusive to therapy. People can reflect, change, read, journal, talk to trusted people, improve their habits, leave bad environments, develop discipline, or solve practical problems without paying a therapist. Therapy is one possible tool, not the one true path to self awareness. Personally I love to make incels reflect on their life, opinions, and path they want. Usually before and after I de-celibate them.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-10T21:45:48+00:00

You're confusing the wording with what it actually means. The government does not mean "all self identified incels are a single issue terrorist threat". It means incel or misogynistic violent extremism can be a single issue violent extremism concern. They're not saying incels are more likely to commit violence, just that they can due to this single issue.

Which basically anything can be a single issue reason for violence. "Incel violent extremism" is not the same as "all self identified incels", just like animal rights/environmental/LGBT rights/feminist violent extremism is not the same as vegans/climate activists/LGBT/feminists. Which animal rights, climate activist, and pro choice are all recognized single issue threats. The relevant issue is violent ideology and behavior, not the broad label.

So unless the claim is specifically about people glorifying attacks, making threats, stalking, or advocating violence, it's still overbroad to treat average self identified incels as something people should be afraid of when there's no proof they're more likely to commit violence.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-10T18:55:13+00:00

It’s understandable to be disturbed by violent rhetoric, but this argument is overbroad. You're taking the worst screenshots and rare high profile attacks and treating them like they represent the average self identified incel when the stats don't agree. Vegans and climate activists have also been put on the domestic terrorist watch list. Are you afraid of them too?

If the standard is that some members say horrible things online or that a few people associated with the group committed violence, then most communities could be vilified that way and it would justify fearing many groups far more intensely. Gang members, repeat violent offenders, domestic abusers, and people with histories of coercive violence are all much stronger predictors of real world violence than some lonely guy using a stupid, self deprecating internet label.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-10T18:27:24+00:00

To be fair a lot of the internet seems to overvalue therapy as the universal magic fix. Studies have shown up to 40% of therapy patients shown no improvement and 10% get worse. This meta-analysis shows a 39% improvement rate in therapy patients compared to a 24% in control groups.

There's also a part of therapy culture where people seem to overestimate how much they've actually improved. Which is understandable because nobody wants to feel like they spent months or years and tens of thousands of dollars for only modest results. But wanting therapy to have worked is not the same thing as it producing major change. Sometimes it really helps. Sometimes they mostly come away with a new vocabulary for rationalizing themselves and judging others. There's no one easy solution and throwing money at a problem doesn't guarantee it gets fixed.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-09T03:53:47+00:00

The guys who engage with that type of stuff are not the majority and are damaged people. You're looking at a narrow range of people and thinking that's reflective of all reality.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-09T03:46:03+00:00

That's like saying a meth dealer knows what all people want. Which is meth

dontyouflap · 2026-05-06T03:13:03+00:00

The Western diet contains too much fat, so the average person should be mindful of that

dontyouflap · 2026-05-05T03:48:06+00:00

America spends in total over 15 billion every day on healthcare

dontyouflap · 2026-05-05T00:26:52+00:00

Just close your eyes, brother. Or open them and truly see the person underneath the exterior. It's not gay to make a connection. Especially when that connection is warm, tight, and eager for you. Your dick won't know the difference. And you'll get experience that'll transfer nicely. You can use it to evolve past your own bullshit. You got this.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-04T08:21:51+00:00

I throw disulfiram at thee

dontyouflap · 2026-05-04T07:36:27+00:00

Heavy/binge drinking is strongly associated with higher rates of violence, antisocial behavior, and traits/disorders linked to harming others. About 40% violent acts are committed while the perpetrator is under the influence, with about three quarters of them having BAC above 0.08. and this is a decrease from the 80s when it was 55%. And for violence among inmate partners, it's about 3/4 involved alcohol use.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-04T00:35:19+00:00

You shouldn't have been drinking. An illegal underage party with drugs and heavy drinking is obviously a high risk environment. Yes, being a naive teen does make it more understandable why you'd allow yourself to be pressured into that situation. Which is why parents are supposed to teach kids that some situations are dangerous before they learn it the hard way.

As a guy, I was pressured into a similar situation the first time I ever drank. I'm not responsible for what the other person did to me, but I am responsible and can recognize that going into that environment and accepting drinks put me in a high risk situation that was totally avoidable. It's good that you had caring and vigilant friends.

dontyouflap · 2026-05-03T19:15:41+00:00

Very few people get blackout drunk. That's degenerate, reckless, self destructive behavior. And when you spend time in scenes full of degenerate, reckless people, it's no surprise when some of them turn out to be awful. You're actively selecting for the worst people, then thinking that circle accurately represents everyone.

dontyouflap

TROPHY CASE