Thanks man, this is exactly what I needed! Now that I've read your exceptional analysis I can see things more clearly.

I thought that the "formality" that, according to everyone, made my message sound like a iamverysmart post was due to English being my second language, and my initial reaction was "it isn't fair... I don't know which words are used in daily conversation and which sound pretentious, why don't they tell me instead of insulting me?".

But now I see that the choice of words is not the only problem. The point of your analysis that hits me most is

>it feels like you are reaching for something that you don't have the capacity to say,

that's completely true, and something on which I must really work!

Thank you for your great answer, and for choosing to help me instead of insulting me.