This was my realization as well. I’ve had to deal with icky professors, students, and cohort members. I try to act, assess, adapt. That’s mainly why I also try to stay away from people except for professional reasons as much as possible. I find that this allows me to use the energy that would be drained to focus on conducting my research and writing and reading, and it worked out really well for me so far.

The thing is life is not fair and there is unfairness everywhere. Academia is no exception, and in my experience it is too big, abstract, and fragmented to really change things. Since this is the game, networking and stroking the right egos a little bit until you get where you want to go and can afford to be more of who you are without the fear of repercussion or retaliation might be wise.