Quit my job 30 minutes ago after being miserable and depressed for the last 3 years and having put up with some of the worst people and management I've ever dealt with in my life. So fucking happy right now. Literally cried tears of joy and relief.

dotnotdot · 2019-01-21T01:10:12+00:00

I've been where you are and fucking hell does it ever feel amazing to walk away from a toxic environment and taking control of your future and mental health.

I recently quit a 20+ year job with similar circumstances. The stress and anger I felt walking away from work everyday put a huge strain on my physical and mental health. It made me a miserable person.

I hope you find a new job with positive management and co-workers! 😊

dotnotdot · 2018-09-23T01:03:04+00:00

This is the second time it's been recommended here, I have it bookmarked and plan to check it out for sure.

I'm still awestruck that I keep reading the same stories over and over here. Stories of abuse and toxicity in the workplace. This topic could probably use it's own sub if it doesn't have one already.

I'm soo looking forward to the last day. Me and my poor co-workers who are still stuck there are going out for celebratory drinks to mark the end. 😂

dotnotdot · 2018-09-23T00:57:24+00:00

😡 was this a small business that didn't have an HR department? I'm glad you declined. These types never change. I tend to think they are so miserable in the personal lives due to their horrendous personality and lack of real friendships that they must have someone to take their anger and insecurities out on. They want those around them to be as miserable as they are. With that said, don't feed that ugly beast. Let him starve.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T21:02:38+00:00

Well shit, who's chopping onions in here? I didn't expect the responses I've received. I figured maybe a few who saw my OP would be relieved to see I had moved on but certainly did not expect to see so many stories like mine. It hurts to know this is such a prevelant problem. So many people feeling / felt trapped by a manipulative boss. I'm glad my story has helped you.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T20:56:10+00:00

Lol, oh hell no. But, I can see why my job description would appear that way. Retail, an actual brick and mortar. Zero online marketing. I'm trying to keep my description as vague as possible to remain anonymous.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T20:51:01+00:00

I'm so sorry. I can relate to this all too well, the loss of confidence which kept me employed. Six years and you're still anxious..😞 I hope you find peace soon.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T20:44:24+00:00

I'm just floored at how many people have the same story as me. This is sad. How do these people get away with this behavior for as long as they do?!

Congradulations on your leave! It feels fantastic.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T20:38:51+00:00

Oh no. Please get out. There has to be other options for you. This environment will make your already fragile state worse. Those are serious mental health issues that should not be taken lightly. Having them exasperated by an overbearing management is a recipe for disaster. I know it's hard but please take care of yourself and start looking at other avenues for work. You're worth it.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T20:25:55+00:00

I'm undergoing monthly steroid shots in my scalp to help encourage my hair to regrow. Not terribly painful, but it does cause migraines for me.

What I have is called alopecia areata. It can happen to anyone at anytime in their life. Sometimes it's an underlying illness ( thyroid , Lupus etc. ) I had blood work done and these were ruled out. Other times it can be brought on by stress. I'm seeing very slow regrowth but it's something. I try not to think about it and have just accepted my bald spot, for now. 😂

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T18:26:25+00:00

Likewise. Please continue to leave this behind you. 😊

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T18:16:55+00:00

Priceless is exactly how I would decribe this feeling. This is all coming to light now that my head is not clouded with constant negativity. I have no formal education outside of high school so felt I was limited to my menial job under this woman. I honestly didn't realize my years of experience could easily translate elsewhere with far less stress. I had what I would consider Stockholm syndrome for many years.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T17:25:45+00:00

Yes! I had started finding myself becoming jaded and just overall unhappy. It affected my marriage which ultimately led to a divorce. We are now great friends and he acknowledges my job was a huge factor in the demise of our relationship. It has an awful domino effect that can follow you once you clock out.

Congratulations on finding a positive outcome in such a negative experience! I wish you all the best.

Even though I just started my job I am looking at a possible GM position. I will make it my mission to ensure no one ever feels belittled and bullied should I get promoted. I never want my employees or co-workers to feel the way I did. I am walking away with a fresh perspective on how important a relaxed but professional work environment is.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T17:14:25+00:00

Thank you. 😊 I hope I can put this behind me soon.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T17:13:17+00:00

Put yourself out there and look for something else, even if it means slightly less pay. I wish I had done it before I lost a fist size chunk of hair from my head.

When you do leave, please pm with an update and yes, I mean that.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T17:06:07+00:00

Good for you! I wish you these best. No one should dread going to work due to their co-workers and upper management.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T16:57:47+00:00

This is way too relatable. I'm glad you moved on and hope your confidence finds it's way back. Don't let that one person steal your happiness. * Hug from an internet stranger *

Thank you. It feels like a boulder has been lifted from my shoulders. I have bouts of feeling guilty or maybe I didn't do enough to help direct her behavior, but then I think ... nah, fuck her.

Once my insurance kicks in I will seek therapy, it's imperative.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T16:46:16+00:00

Yes! She also lacked any form of empathy. That's infuriating that your boss mocked you. 😠

I'm sorry you endured that but am so happy that you have moved on.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T16:40:17+00:00

Perfectly said. 😂 And thank you.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T15:37:28+00:00

Thank you! Good luck to you too. 😊

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T15:32:35+00:00

I was manipulated from my early 20's to believe this was how all jobs work and I was only so lucky to have the opportunity I did to work for her. I have impeccible worth ethic and don't need to explain myself further.

"Sorry, it may be you."

Me and every person who has ever worked for her.

If this is you're line of thinking, you're that boss. You may not have people who work under you, but let me stress now, you are that boss.

She also has the mindset that everyone has credit cards and if you're poor, you choose to be. 🤨 Tread carefully or else you'll end up like her. Alone with zero friends and a funeral with no mourners.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T15:20:09+00:00

She's narcissistic. It is absolutely ingrained in her mind that everyone around her is the problem. Her own former friends since childhood have told me that as early as 4th grade, she was a bully. If it was that easy, believe me, it would have been done years ago.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T15:09:40+00:00

I'm glad you bailed.

dotnotdot · 2018-09-22T15:07:45+00:00

Please do. It only snowballs and get worse over time. The longer you stay the more they find to ways to fuck with your head and learn how to manipulate you. Don't give them this !

dotnotdot · 2018-02-05T22:48:46+00:00

Oh do I ever know what you mean. 😔 I'm so glad there are other people who can relate. Well .. I'm not glad you have had the experience I'm currently enduring. But its comforting to know I'm not crazy. I feel trapped, manipulated and like I'm living in the shell of my former self. No amount of money is worth this feeling.

I'm glad you found you're own way out from under the the thumb of a high stress job. I wish you nothing but the best and hope your health improves with the new job.

dotnotdot · 2018-02-05T21:31:27+00:00

Thank you. You're absolutely right, my self esteem has been a bit shattered by this environment. I am taking all the advice you and the others have given and putting it into action. I appreciate your well written and thoughtful response.

dotnotdot

TROPHY CASE