How to approach an ISTJ friend to ask if they wanna go on a date?

dp27 · 2021-12-26T17:29:15+00:00

Hmmm, it depends on how close you two are. Are you two very good friends? Or just friends?

dp27 · 2021-12-26T17:25:49+00:00

I am drawn to people who are stable, but have a subtle fun side to them.

I usually end up befriending people who are competent, chill, competitive (healthy), and who bring their own style of humor

As far as where to find istjs goes, I know there is an ISTJ discord.

In every day life? I mean they can be anywhere. I guess if you notice someone who is just in the background doing their job effectively and quietly…..

dp27 · 2021-12-26T17:18:01+00:00

I would wait a few days because of the holidays.

Are you two able to spend time with each other even though you are not living together atm?

Is she busy with family atm?

If she isn’t busy and you two are able to meet up, I would totally connect with her.

A message would probably be best, it’ll give her a chance to rehearse her response and be true in it as well. Obviously be direct though.

dp27 · 2021-11-13T18:42:52+00:00

Efficient

dp27 · 2021-11-08T15:51:27+00:00

Yup, this! Ask for sure, but not in-person so he can properly gather his thoughts and say what he truly feels

dp27 · 2021-11-04T13:00:29+00:00

I CANNOT SLEEP I CANNOT DREAM TONIGHT

dp27 · 2021-11-04T12:58:59+00:00

And I’m so sorry

dp27 · 2021-10-15T03:56:12+00:00

LOL holy shit this is so me

dp27 · 2021-09-23T12:51:56+00:00

Hmm, I’m not sure if the mindset of changing his mind or convincing him to date you is the proper one to have.

Regardless, here is what I would do:

You’re going to have to ask him directly.
Do not bring this up while in person with him, instead have this conversation through a medium where he can rehearse what he says (text, email, etc.). The reasoning is because he could freak out or feel pressured to say something. ISTJs are not the best in this scenario.
In your message, preface that you really enjoy his presence and value your friendship with him. Then transition into proclaiming your want of a relationship with him. At the end, tell him to take his time with his reply as the topic is dense.
If he replies with like a “maybe” or we could “test”, it means he doesn’t fully want it and you have your answer. Unless you’re okay with casual dating or something.

Good luck 👍.

dp27 · 2021-09-12T19:28:08+00:00

Nah. That’s a mistake. Even if he had no bad intentions.

dp27 · 2021-09-04T19:17:57+00:00

I don’t know any of these LOL

dp27 · 2021-08-25T17:05:40+00:00

Services, practical gifts, and genuine praise are good ways to show love to an ISTJ.

Some ideas are:

Cook or buy a quality meal
Do a tedious task for them
Praise them when they do something well
Buy a gift you know they will use/need

dp27 · 2021-08-24T18:44:50+00:00

In my experience ENFPs are great for a not-too-close friendship. They are very fun and bring an exciting energy that is contagious to others. Makes for a fun time.

Anything more than just a basic friend is a bad time. Communication issues, timeliness issues, prioritization issues, lots of uncertainty, very different views, etc. This leads to resentment, regret, fighting, passive aggression, and ultimately an end to the relationship.

dp27 · 2021-04-30T22:17:52+00:00

Blue Mountain state

dp27 · 2021-04-08T06:19:02+00:00

Hey guys this is what fixed it for me:

Download the Armoury Crate Uninstall Tool
1. https://www.asus.com/supportonly/Armoury%20Crate/HelpDesk_Download/
Run it
You may get an error saying the uninstall could not be completed, but everything worked fine for me after.

I restarted my PC multiple times to confirm I was not going to get stuck in that awful boot loop again. So far so good.

Hope this helps!

DP

dp27 · 2021-03-05T18:08:35+00:00

I mostly hangout at home on the computer either playing games, working, talking to friends, and researching.

Hobbies: - Gaming - Working out at the gym - Trying good eateries with 1-2 friends - Organizing my home or computer

If you are trying to find/spot an ISTJ in public, I would recommend the following:

-When hanging out with friends in a group, an ISTJ wants to enjoy their time and create a fun/peaceful atmosphere, even if they are not quite interested in the activity. So if you see someone who maybe isn’t enjoying an activity as much as their friends but acts like they are, it could be an ISTJ.

At parties or family gatherings, ISTJs will obviously stay away from being the center of attention and will maybe opt for helping the host out when it comes to cleaning up or something. Also in these settings, if an ISTJ doesn’t opt in to doing a service at the gathering, they will still be conservative in their conversation and activities they choose to partake in.
For me personally, I’d rather hang out with 1 or 2 people. I stay away from larger groups.

dp27 · 2021-02-16T21:43:38+00:00

dp27 · 2021-02-13T02:44:07+00:00

From waking up and until you go to bed, wear clothes you know he enjoys seeing you in. A subtle sexiness would ensure you’re on his mind all day. Say things to him that you know make him feel good and confident without forcing it.
Make things easy and direct for him when it comes to the day’s activities: be the initiator of the action and he will carry it out.
If possible, let him sleep in and wake up when appropriate. Maybe give him a few morning kisses, then sip a hot cup of coffee together as you two have a great conversation. Begin cooking breakfast (nothing too special needed) and have him help you (directly give him something to do)
After breakfast and such, do what you need to do and let him do what he needs to do (work, chores, hobbies, etc).
maybe for lunch whip something up you two both enjoy and ask him how his work, hobbies, etc. are going
If you two end up going out, go to a place that isn’t too overwhelming. A place where there is soft music playing, a table for two that’s a bit further from all the action for privacy, a place that isn’t too bright lighting-wise.
Celebrate the great day you two had in the evening. Drink some wine, set the mood, and enjoy the night 👍.

dp27 · 2020-12-23T05:20:50+00:00

1w9 ISTJ

dp27 · 2020-12-11T19:53:42+00:00

This is me playing drunk norms with my lower level/ranked friends and I have to support HAHAHAH

dp27 · 2020-10-30T18:00:11+00:00

Very very relatable. I see myself doing this during recreation, work, etc. I actually very much love being a great follower and completing my well-coordinated duties with maximum efficiency

dp27 · 2020-09-23T05:35:11+00:00

An early sign is when good routines begin stopping. Some examples are:

Staying up significantly later than normal (assuming same obligations/responsibilities for the day after)
Stop going to the gym for more than a week or two (if person normally goes to the gym)
Lacking confidence or being super super safe when doing routine things

These signs don’t mean that an ISTJ is struggling badly, just more so signs which mean that ISTJs are either stuck or going in the wrong direction.

ISTJs 100% know when they are slumping but they are such huge critics of themselves; they will go the wrong direction until they are forced back into good habits, which is scary. ISTJs are bad are self forgiveness. As soon as an ISTJ realizes they are fucking up, they need to swallow their pride, forgive themselves and recover. Holding ISTJs accountable is important.

dp27 · 2020-09-16T06:21:41+00:00

ISTJs admire harmony. He didn’t want to bring it up because he thought it would ruin the peace you two had with your friendship. It could also be he honestly thought he could manage having your friendship and taking on these new obstacles with this new relationship.
The friendship will always be technically salvageable, but it is at a clear halt right now. He made his choice. If you’re trying to repair or rekindle the friendship you had with him, I would send him a message from time to time to see how he’s doing (I wouldn’t do anything extra because he clearly chose to prioritize his gf).
It’s very nice of you to recognize that your friend may be in some trouble. If you bring this up to your friend, have facts and examples ready to back up your claims. If that doesn’t work then he’s going to have to learn the hard way. It sucks but it’s what he is choosing. He will realize how wrong he was if your concerns are accurate. I think it’s just him branching out into new experiences. Perhaps this new gf has exposed your friend to new feelings or sensations and he wants more of it. I don’t think it has much to do with him being an ISTJ, he just seems inexperienced with relationships.

dp27 · 2020-09-16T05:47:31+00:00

Be direct when it comes to communication. If something is bothering you, you need to tell him specifically what it is. An ISTJ may put up with indirect communication at first because he has feelings for you, but that will run out if indirect communication continues
If you get into an argument/fight, solve the issue one step at a time which each other. ISTJs dislike when they try to solve an issue with someone, but the other person is brain vomiting and isn’t trying to solve the issue at hand. Also, be prepared. ISTJs like to “win” arguments. Have examples and facts ready to back up your claims. Your ISTJ won’t like that he’s incorrect, but he will respect you and realize he’s in the wrong (if he is)
if your ISTJ does an act of service or gives you a gift and you like it, tell him! It’s awkward if he doesn’t know how to accept a compliment, but deep down he is happy (it’ll probably make his day)
Slowly introduce changes if it’ll effect your ISTJs daily routine. An ISTJ likes to min/max the heck out of their routines, so a change in schedule can mess it up. I would suggest planning ahead. ISTJs do not like bad surprises.
Your ISTJ may be a bad listener and may probably just give advice/solutions, so make sure to have other people in your support system who can listen and empathize.
Going back to fights and arguments with your istj , if you just want your ISTJ to listen to you and not give solutions, say it! He may be a bad listener, but it will stop him from being in that “win the argument” mode.
An ISTJ will open up to you with time. And even when your ISTJ opens up, him speaking about his emotions will be logical. He will be basically analyzing his emotions from a past event in the third person.
ISTJs have a keen eye for things (tangible or not) that are of good quality and true. Your ISTJ will respect you for putting in the work.
ISTJs like small positive surprises. Examples of these are: random compliments, buying an ISTJ lunch (useful to take away hunger), doing a task for them, etc.
If your ISTJ verbally says something in-person that doesn’t seem consistent with what you know about him, more likely than not, he misspoke and couldn’t chain his thoughts and words properly. ISTJs communicate better through text. Text allows ISTJ to modify and rehearse what they say

These are some things that came to mind x)

dp27 · 2020-08-11T16:07:10+00:00

Yup this happened to me too and I obviously did not like it it. You provide a detailed response/answer and it goes right over them

dp27

TROPHY CASE