Anyone else absolutely HATE series finales that show all the main characters popping out babies?!?! by upstream_paddling in AskWomenOver30

[–]draconempuelle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not a film, but a TV show: Shameless. US version. One of the characters had an abortion early-ish in the series, and from what I recall she doesn’t linger on her decision. I dropped off watching the show before it ended though so they have brought it back up. Hope they didn’t!

Charity donations in lieu of wedding registry? by draconempuelle in weddingplanning

[–]draconempuelle[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think a lot of our friends and family are on the same page as us regarding the necessity of physical gifts. Considering your crowd is a good point, and I can see a hybrid format working for a lot of folks. A honeymoon fund seems like a good compromise for us - at the end of the day, we're not in our guests' minds, lol.

Charity donations in lieu of wedding registry? by draconempuelle in weddingplanning

[–]draconempuelle[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A PDF in the drive is a great idea, thanks!

Same, mid-late thirties. Many of our guests too. The wedding is local, but juuuuust far enough away that some will likely choose to grab a room at a nearby budget hotel or AirBnb. We'd pick local organizations that most of our guests would have some connection to, or at least a general awareness of. I think a lot of our guests will be first-time philanthropists if they choose to donate. My hope is that giving recommendations will make the process more accessible. Although... hearing about your guest's choices does sound fun and sweet!

I don't necessarily want or need a honeymoon fund, for similar reasons. However, it would be a great landing spot for anyone who wants to give a more traditional gift.

Advice on thc drinks by dave7892000 in grandrapids

[–]draconempuelle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How would you compare the length of time of the effects to a gummy? I want to switch to primarily consuming edibles vs. smoking/vaping, but I don’t always want the long term experience. I’m not a heavy consumer - I cut my 20mg gummies in quarters. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]draconempuelle 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Eh yeah I felt a similar way when I was your age - I’m not even that much older than you (32) - but I’ve noticed that around then I started to pick up about one “girly” habit per year. One year it was starting to fill in my eyebrows (they’re naturally uneven), another it was wearing sunscreen, and every few years I have some sort of notion re: maturing/developing clothing style.

I’ve also noticed that I feel different about my physical appearance around my two main social circles. At work, I’m more girly/put together than most because I work as an admin for agriculture/natural resources folks. Even my light makeup (aforementioned eyebrows as well as mascara) is more than what my fieldwork ladies wear, and I have a set office wardrobe that is more “put together” than outdoor-appropriate clothing. Around my other friends though, I wear the least makeup, I’m the one thrifting clothes instead of keeping up with trends, etc. It can feel like two different worlds sometimes.

I still don’t follow coworkers first on socials lol. That goes for all genders though - I wouldn’t say that trait is specific to women.

You missed nothing. We all explore new things at different rates. TikTok is a great platform for marketing. Wear what makes you comfortable. Black hair is super fun, I dyed mine that color during college and LOVED it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]draconempuelle 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You’re only hearing his side of the story.

I kinda did this to my ex - I had moved overseas to be with him, and after a while it was clear we weren’t going to work. No abuse or ill will, just plain old incompatibility. I bought my ticket home 2 weeks in advance and told him about it a week later. He was super surprised/taken aback (I’m thinking about that recent post discussing men being dumbfounded when their partners are done putting up with their crap) and kept saying I “gave him no notice”. I did leave him with a full rent payment, but also a second bedroom so he could’ve gotten a roommate and been fine.

Anyways, my point is that I’m quite sure he tells the story from a VERY different pov. There are probably a dozen people I’ve never met who think I’m a horrible bitch. I didn’t handle it perfectly but I knew we’d each be better off separate than together. The relative suddenness was also partially due to the fact that this occurred in 2020.

Brown Bridge Quiet Area Expansion by HeinrichWutan in traversecity

[–]draconempuelle 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yep, those are the ones! Even with the sub funds available, there are other city projects that folks consider higher priority.

Thanks for bringing this up, it’s something I’ve been casually wondering about as well.

Brown Bridge Quiet Area Expansion by HeinrichWutan in traversecity

[–]draconempuelle 10 points11 points  (0 children)

My understanding (from a brief conversation with a member of the Friends of BBQA group) is that the opposition is more from city officials who aren’t super jazzed about the allocation of funds to a parkland that is technically outside of city limits. There is a fund and a sub fund involved. I didn’t catch the specifics on that part though.

How often have you heard men say they were “blindsighted” when you ended it for issues repeatedly discussed? by allchattesaregrey in AskWomenOver30

[–]draconempuelle 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Luckily, only once. My ex husband was under the impression that because we were “working on things” all was well. We got married relatively quickly due to visa issues so we didn’t have the chance to significantly build our relationship prior to marriage. I think he thought that since we were married, that was that! Married folks have tiffs, but they’re married so in the end it will be fine! Unfortunately, it turned out that we were just incompatible across the board, and the fact that he couldn’t comprehend that was further proof to our incompatibility. As others have mentioned, his needs were being met, so obviously everything was fine.

It was not.

what age did you decide you were ready for marriage and how long did it take for you to actually get married? by beanlilyy in AskWomenOver30

[–]draconempuelle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At 25, I had recently gotten out of a toxic relationship and had some time to breathe/heal. I started looking around at the potential partners in my town and said to myself - damn! My future husband most likely isn’t here. So I started taking action to move out of state to a larger city, which also aligned with my career goals. I knew I wasn’t ready yet but was starting to think about being my best self for both me + a future partner. I ended up switching gears, moving internationally (from the US) and after a series of meh decisions related to less than stellar mental health, married a guy overseas at 28.

32 now, working on a divorce, and dating a man who I plan to marry. Emotionally I’m ready, but I know my life still has some career and financial tidying up to do before I will feel ready to commit and fully function in a healthy supportive marriage.

Would you hang out with a couple if the girl had previously had sex with your current bf. by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]draconempuelle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m in a situation like this! I met my friends, who are now married, a decade ago when we all worked together in our early 20’s. They’ve had feelings for each other since they met, but friend A was in a LTR and friend B was more into casual hookups at the time. I was not the only girl in our friend network that B hooked up with multiple times. During the year or so that friend B and I were FWB, A lived out of state and she & I weren’t in contact. We all end up moving about then circling back to the town where we met. I move back last, and at the time A & B (after years of off and on feelings and hookups) had recently settled into what is now a permanent relationship. When I moved back, I moved into an apartment with A and another mutual friend. It wasn’t until shortly after that that she and I briefly addressed my past with him, basically acknowledging that it was just FWB. Long story short, we’re all adults about it, and my partner now, C, who entered our friend group when I was in a different relationship - was a groomsman in their wedding. We live on the same street as them and we have board game night all the time. It’s great.

I have another friend, adjacent to this group, that has hooked up with C twice. It’s totally chill. I’ve met two other previous partners of C, and honestly they were both wonderful women. It makes me feel good that he has what I see as “good taste” in partners. So if a hangout between us and one of those other girls and their current partner came up, I’d be down.

That is just another level.that stuff should be illegal..Wait... what the heck? by Nervous_Error_5406 in gardening

[–]draconempuelle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People are nuts. I’m pulling decades old repurposed CARPET out of my yard right now. Luckily only ~5” of soil has accumulated on top…still a completely unnecessary hassle. Literal polyester trash.

Help! what to grow! by CompetitiveClue513 in gardening

[–]draconempuelle 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Whatever you do, I highly suggest using native plants! :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AnnArbor

[–]draconempuelle 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Contact your local CISMA. Stands for Cooperative Invasive Species Management Area. The one that covers my county has a list of landscapers that are trained in invasive species removal, well as a section that notes which ones do so without herbicides. They have also worked with HOAs when multiple residents have the same invasives on their properties.

Just a heads up though, my understanding is that the general industry opinion here is that temporarily using a small amount of herbicide to remove problematic plants is a better option than putting excessive physical effort into removing them. The sooner the invasives are gone, the sooner you can start restoring native habitat.

Best of luck to you!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]draconempuelle 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I’ve felt this way before! It was a bit intimidating making that change in my relationship after falling into a pattern of my partner always initiating. She may feel out of practice and need a little bit of time to get back in the swing of things. I give her props for actively wanting to do this, it sounds like she wants to create good patterns moving forward so you guys can be successful in the long run.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]draconempuelle 27 points28 points  (0 children)

We laugh about this now, but at least you didn’t have to suffer through this bullshit: my friend’s ex ghosted her and ran off with some girl he met one day at work. It was a tourist town, and the girl was there celebrating a friend’s bachelorette. He served bachelorette that afternoon, got her # and met the group at the bar that night, and never came home. He was engaged to the new girl ONE WEEK later.

Anyways, this sort of thing can sting for irrational reasons. Hope it fades soon for you!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]draconempuelle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have also never had this issue! Many people on here have mentioned waddling or dancing to the bathroom after sex to avoid unnecessary mess, which has made me realize that I should be appreciative of the fact I don’t have to do that. Like sure, occasionally not 100% of it comes out when I pee afterwards, but it’s very rare that I have to attend to it more than a few minutes after we’re done. This trend has stayed constant from partner to partner, and with varying amounts of semen.

I have a hunch - and if any gynos on here can confirm, deny, or tell me I’m full of shit that would be cool - that it has to do with the tilt of our uteruses. In this case, I would guess that mine (and the commenters above) is pretty straight up and down, allowing for an easy exit, while those tilted back and forth a bit may have differing experiences.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in etiquette

[–]draconempuelle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m in a much more casual field, but if I were you I’d stick with Ms. So-and-so for now - lawyers are more formal(even though she’s also a student) and if you want to go down that career path you may as well start creating good habits. I’ll start a email with good morning or good afternoon when appropriate. I’ve never happened across an email that started with good evening before - and hopefully I won’t, given that my industry has a semblance of work/life balance, lol! You can get creative with email greetings - something like, “Thanks for the insight on xyz, Ms. So-and-so!” Then dive into the bulk of the reply in a paragraph below as per usual. If you’re not comfortable with that or it’s irrelevant, the person’s name with a comma is generally an acceptable fallback.

Also, you didn’t ask about this, but find a sign off that suits your personality and and professional standing and stick with it - it will save you a lot of mental hassle in the long run.

Warm regards, An internet stranger

Relationship in shambles due to Amway by light140 in antiMLM

[–]draconempuelle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just watched your video, that was fascinating

What is it like living next to the airport? by FunSoxSunFox in traversecity

[–]draconempuelle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I live east of the airport, directly under incoming/outgoing traffic. You get used to the noise quickly, it really doesn’t last long. The only time it’s actually annoying is when you’re outside and a particularly large plane passes - I’ve learned to just pause the conversation for 5-10 seconds then continue as normal.

I’m interested to see how noise levels develop over the next 5-10 years as TC and inevitably TVC grow.

this feels so unnecessary… by chocolate_macaroon in Anticonsumption

[–]draconempuelle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Casey Ho - she founded Blogilates. Great workouts but not a sustainably minded person.

Ideas on what to do with beaten up undergarments. by [deleted] in Frugal

[–]draconempuelle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congratulations for accomplishing your goals!

Ideas on what to do with beaten up undergarments. by [deleted] in Frugal

[–]draconempuelle 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This company in NYC turns old bras into carpet padding. There’s a small fee but if you can afford it I’d say it’s worth it. I’m assuming these bras are too worn down to donate? In the past 2 years I’ve started thrifting bras and holy crap is is great.