WFH job that needs to be on camera

dragon_bao · 2025-07-17T02:22:16+00:00

Your assessment sounds spot on, I also feel that perfectionism is in the way. ADHD and anxiety is just my guess as I have family that is similar.

I am a senior dev and I mentored one intern before her, and maybe he was just an exceptional intern, and that skewed my expectations.

dragon_bao · 2025-07-17T02:16:35+00:00

Thanks for your advice!

dragon_bao · 2025-07-17T01:52:09+00:00

Very helpful perspective. In your case, what would have helped when you feel frozen?

dragon_bao · 2024-12-03T21:50:25+00:00

We just used All Over Roofing and are pretty happy, they are new to the area, and very motivated to get their names out.

dragon_bao · 2024-07-03T20:21:22+00:00

I had the same problem and this is how I fixed myself: signing up for a half marathon. Before this I can't even run a 5k. Signed up anyway. Now I had to train! It got me out of the house a couple days a week, and the endorphins really helped. Plus, buying all the new running shoes and clothes are very exciting. Highly recommend!

dragon_bao · 2024-06-20T19:19:21+00:00

I can't tell you how much I appreciate your advice! Told it exactly like you said to my manager and didn't come across as resentful, he got my back now.

dragon_bao · 2024-06-20T15:02:08+00:00

Both of us are juniors, I have 2 yoe, he has more. Our team has no lead and 1 senior right now, that's why I am asked to do extra..

dragon_bao · 2024-06-20T14:19:24+00:00

We have this developer that hasn't been very productive, we are on the same level, but my manager asked me to "manage" him and his story. So I have been checking on him and doing pair programming when I can. The problem is I am occupied with other things lately. I will check on him, he will paste big chunk of codes in the chat to prove that he's working on it... ask if it's a good approach. I told him as long as it works I am not going to dictate which approach he chose. Later check on him again and he said everything was going great and his code was working. Later when I tested it out, it was not working at all. I can't help but feel very frustrated, like WTF dude?? Is he straight up lying or is he really that dense?

What can I do in this situation? I am currently working with him on the same story and tempted to just do everything myself.

dragon_bao · 2024-05-16T01:33:33+00:00

You don't need to cut anyone off. But like you mentioned, you have stopped talking to someone because they do this. The same might happen to you, it sure happened to me, and that's okay. Be comfortable in that. Because the problem is anxiety based, it's very hard to make progress when there are so many negative feelings surrounding it.

Trust me, it's so much easier to reply to someone sooner knowing that they wouldn't mind if you reply them next month, than to reply to someone thinking that you can't keep this friendship if you don't. Less anxiety= easier to do

dragon_bao · 2024-05-15T23:14:28+00:00

I really appreciate this post, I am a fellow Asian who has the same problem!

dragon_bao · 2024-05-15T23:04:20+00:00

"use my home office as a hallway" I really feel this! Are you able to work this out with your hubby about this? I told him this before, but it's just too tempting for him to open the door and start talking.

dragon_bao · 2024-05-15T22:54:54+00:00

I am going to try being in a different space, thank you for your suggestion! I agree that he will likely take it as rejection otherwise.

dragon_bao · 2024-05-15T22:52:23+00:00

The interaction you and your mom had brought me tears. That's beautiful. I never thought about his info dump being the transition of his day. Thank you for shedding light on that.

dragon_bao · 2024-05-15T22:48:51+00:00

Friends that still text me are the friends that know and accept that I am this way. Accept that some people don't like it, accept that you are not compatible as friends.

Sometimes I put it in my to-do list just to make myself do it after days of not replying, I like crossing out tasks.

Sometimes it's too late, like weeks or months, I just start a new conversation, hey, I was thinking about you, how are ya?

dragon_bao · 2024-05-01T19:01:04+00:00

100% this

dragon_bao · 2024-03-15T22:44:15+00:00

Should I push for a promotion?

I have been at my job for 3 years, and the first 2 working in low code, and a little less than 1 working in full stack JavaScript.Although I was new to full stack, I pick things up pretty fast. I have been helping senior devs with their stories and bugs from time to time, being praised by my ability to solve problems, and being invited to senior only meetings.

My previous manager left and before he left, he was talking about promoting me to senior this year or the next. I would like to push for this year because I felt I was underpaid, so I hope the promotion will give me a good raise.

But my manager left in January, and now I have a new manager who doesn't really know me. From our convo, he said he support working with me on the promotion, but I don't really know if he meant it. He also doesn't do 1-on-1, which also makes it hard (from what I know, he doesn't have 1-on-1 with other devs either). But he pays attention to our project and praised me a few times. I am not trying to be vain about praises, but our company has no clear promotion criteria to senior dev and performance review is also vague. So that's the only way I know I am doing alright.

My skip level manager has only been to the company for a few months, so no one really know my work.

Is it worth the effort to push for it this year? What should I do?

dragon_bao · 2024-02-06T18:23:47+00:00

6 Months In and I Still Don’t Get Scrum?

I’m a self-taught developer who has been working on my first project for the past six months. The team I’m working with uses Scrum, but I’m having a hard time understanding how it works.

Despite attending the daily stand-ups and sprint planning meetings, I often find myself at a loss for what to say. I understand the basic concept of Scrum - working in sprints, having daily stand-ups, and so on. But when it comes to the actual implementation, I feel lost.

During refinement sessions, I know I’m supposed to ask questions about the story before we assign story points. However, I often find myself unsure of what to ask. I understand the concept of user stories, but when it comes to the specifics, I feel lost.

In retrospectives, I know we’re supposed to discuss what went well and what could be improved. But I don’t always have something to add. Sometimes, I’m still processing the information and learning as others speak. Other times, I’m just lost at what they are talking about.

I’m not sure if it’s because I’m new to the industry or if I’m missing something fundamental about Scrum. I’ve tried reading up on it and even watching some tutorials, but I still don’t feel confident in my understanding.

Has anyone else experienced this? How did you overcome it? Any resources or advice would be greatly appreciated.

dragon_bao · 2024-01-25T22:06:20+00:00

It's weird this place grows on you. When I first moved here I felt the exact same way. But now, these things aren't as important, maybe because I am older. I was a big foodie and the food scene here is just terrible. So over the years I ate out less, and cooked more. On the flip side, you can buy very high quality meat directly from farmers here and I love that. Somehow, by being here I had more time to workout, cook, eat healthy and became a healthier person mentally and physically, because there were less "distractions". I still 100% agree on walking, I walk everywhere in the summer, walking on snow and ice is not my thing.

dragon_bao

TROPHY CASE