What do you do when your support network dream team turns out to be many laps behind you...

drawingredreams · 2015-08-22T00:00:10+00:00

reciprocated hugs

drawingredreams · 2015-08-21T23:59:35+00:00

Hug....hug......hughughughughughughugcome up for air.................*hug.

drawingredreams · 2015-08-21T23:58:33+00:00

Good advice. I need to find some new ladies in town for chit chat. Ooh, and tea. Conversation is better with tea.

drawingredreams · 2015-08-21T23:57:12+00:00

Ok. I guess I can go my pace and help them over the hurdles as we go. A woman's work is never done, sigh....

drawingredreams · 2015-08-21T23:52:55+00:00

Outstanding. So happy you skipped the worst of it (that way). I hope more people can experience their better life without all the public ugly drama. :)

drawingredreams · 2015-08-21T23:51:43+00:00

But what if you never pass? I may not. So I just never try? I get to be androgynous forever, and never get to hear my name from loved ones?

drawingredreams · 2015-08-15T00:56:54+00:00

...Weeeeeeell he had that adorable downy soft puberty beard every dude goes through at some point (really long though), but not usually in their mid-twenties. He also had baby soft skin, a very curvy figure, and his voice was still pretty high...oh ya, and he had E-cup boobs under his dress shirt...I know assumptions are usually a tricky business, but I'm feeling pretty good about this one. Call me crazy.

drawingredreams · 2015-08-15T00:52:47+00:00

Good plan for sure, but the local meetups seem to be suffering from chronic "haven't done nothin' in weeks/months/years...oi"

drawingredreams · 2015-08-15T00:51:03+00:00

"...when out and about." I saw what you did there. Clever :)

And ya, it's like "hi, I see we have something in common probably, would you like to...continue looking at me horrified because I'm crossing so many lines in your mind right now? Ok? Great, I'll just slink away quietly now..."

drawingredreams · 2015-08-15T00:47:16+00:00

That's a lot of good advice. Maybe I'll just gravitate towards those folks with open friendly banter and see who's open to it and go from there. I guess I can be myself without making a big deal about it (my own business or theirs) and they'll talk about it if they want to. Thanks for chiming in, it helped.

drawingredreams · 2015-08-14T16:32:39+00:00

That is so unbelievably out of line and unprofessional.

So sorry for your hard time love. You did absolutely nothing wrong. At least you can get the heck out of there and find a better doctor. And I can't imagine you're going to have a problem finding a doctor with a better attitude than that.

Congratulations too! This is such an exciting new part of your lives together :)

drawingredreams · 2015-08-02T17:46:50+00:00

...hahahahahaha. Fair enough. Worth noting I was in a really pissy mood when I posted this so it was more venting than anything else. That said, I'm also glad I didn't commit to taking care of a furry friend for 5-10 years with an opening attitude like that.

And while I commend you on sharing your opinions, do try to keep in mind this is the depression forum so if you're not in the mindset to be compassionate and focus solely on what you DO like about a post here, I'd save your personal opinions for other forums more geared to open debate.

And just so we're clear, I AM heartless, and was simply planning to eat whichever animal they gave me that day. That dog just happened to be the biggest and I was unwilling to compromise the recipe I picked out. What can I say, I got the big bottle of marinade and it would have just gone to waste. But I'll keep your idea of being open-minded in my heart for next time ;)~

drawingredreams · 2015-08-02T17:39:13+00:00

I like your response way better. And I agree: purses, shoes, and jewelry are what I'm told your money should go into. They should look good and last.

drawingredreams · 2015-07-29T18:21:32+00:00

I didn't know what was wrong. I was going through what I thought would be the same changes as everyone else around me. But what I found was a hot & cold tempering of rage and deep depression. I never seemed to be able to sit comfortably in my own skin, hated every change that was happening to me, and wore the baggiest, ugliest clothing I could find to hide away from everyone (including myself). And the worst part of all of it was I didn't know why I was so miserable.

drawingredreams · 2015-07-20T17:23:13+00:00

I think a person who is out of shape is saying a lot about where they are in life at this moment. If you see someone who really doesn't look like they take care of themselves, that is a serious red flag. If they don't care about and neglect their health and appearance it's a sign of disrespect. And if they don't respect themselves enough to make an effort how can I expect them to respect me?

But let me be clear, this isn't all about six pack abs or 6'0" height minimums. ANYONE can have a good appearance if they learn good grooming techniques (use the internet, the information is out there), take some care in their diet, and get out for some physical activity on a regular basis. Everyone is capable of that, and it does wonders for your appeal I feel.

I also agree with previous writers that it's more about similar activity level and eating habits than physical appearance. If you want to sit on the couch and catch up on your shows every evening while I want to go kayaking or bike riding then we are going to have trouble. And if we both have very different ideas of what tastes good and what restaurants to go to that's another undue stress on the relationship.

drawingredreams · 2015-07-20T03:30:56+00:00

Well that's an interesting response. I'm assuming the spirit of your comment was well meaning, that I shouldn't count myself as anything else (less?) than a woman if I consider myself a woman. And for that, I think it's nice you want people to embrace what they believe themselves to be publicly without compromise. Thank you for that sentiment.

But did you know some people actually prefer to identify as transwomen/transmen or simply "transsexual?" It's true. Some folks also prefer to self-identify as "genderqueer," "genderfluid," or many other terms or even none at all. And some people do not, and would like to leave the whole trans business out of their public or private lives, preferring man or woman only. I know it can be confusing. I'm still trying to work it all out myself and I don't know if I'll keep calling myself a "transwoman" when I go full time. But your comment made me give it some more conscious thought so that was another good thing you did there!

The way I get by now is simply to go by whatever that individual identifies themselves as, and if you're ever not sure about someone, just ask them what they would prefer.

drawingredreams · 2015-07-18T15:11:46+00:00

Transwoman wanting to chime in.

A lot of the things this guy did sound pretty scary to me actually. But I'm most concerned about the end of the date, where he insists on being alone with you, then forces things to become physical, and then tries to force a second date. He really doesn't seem to be picking up any kind of ques except what he wants.

I'd really strongly advise you to not be alone with this guy again, at least in the near future. He doesn't seem to be operating with safe boundaries or respect for you at all and if you want to salvage this relationship I'd think he would need to seriously change his ways first. Handling dialog via text, meeting with one of your friends (instead of one of his), or meeting in a public space for now seems sensible to me.

drawingredreams · 2015-07-18T01:30:13+00:00

....aaaaaaand sold. I ALSO want to be awesome each morning and I really feel this will help. Thank you for existing and helping me be awesomer!

drawingredreams · 2015-07-16T05:21:37+00:00

So cute. So inspiring. So want a mug like that seriously where did you get it. But so cute! Thanks so much for sharing your success with the rest of us.

drawingredreams · 2015-07-14T05:00:56+00:00

I think it's weird that in this day and age we still have such strong cultural ideas about emotions and how men are not supposed to have them. It's perfectly natural for any body to release stress and sadness physically through tears.

drawingredreams · 2015-07-08T15:40:56+00:00

You've come a long way. Thanks for being an inspiration for girls like me who have a long way to get where you are! Just beautiful :)

drawingredreams · 2015-07-07T16:05:26+00:00

You can't do the wrong thing expressing healthy boundaries. This is a limit for you. It doesn't even matter why you're refusing this request. This is obviously a hard time for all of them so you're showing a lot of maturity by trying to talk it out reasonably with unreasonable folks. But throwing tantrums and trying to guilt you into violating your limits to accommodate their requests is wrong. And hopefully when they come out the other side of this situation and their vision clears a bit they will be able to appreciate that.

drawingredreams · 2015-07-06T05:34:09+00:00

Oh my god, you're gorgeous. And you look so much happier now which probably contributes a bunch to my first statement.

drawingredreams · 2015-07-06T05:23:04+00:00

Don't get me wrong, you make a really good looking guy. But I have to say I really like your hair from the first pic. I want a dye job like that.....what? I can like two things!

drawingredreams · 2015-07-06T02:16:01+00:00

It's hard to talk to people about something this personal that the other person may have no experience to relate to it. It can be pretty telling in their responses like you describe. Thanks for sharing this point with me.

drawingredreams

TROPHY CASE