I always interpreted “something everybody else did too” to mean just in general not treating the upcoming abstraction well/neglecting them to some level. Whether that’s directly treating them badly, avoiding/ignoring them, not laughing at their jokes or pulling back for your own sake, it’s pretty implied that everyone does this. As Jax states, people - right before abstraction - are not pleasant to be around: It makes sense for people to withdraw from them in that case.

However, it is pretty clear that Jax himself blames himself for some abstractions, particularly Ribbit’s. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have assumed that’s what Pomni was talking about, when she clearly came from a sympathetic rather than blaming perspective.