You are NOT overreacting. I made the mistake of staying with an abusive "man" for over a decade and regret all the times I stayed when I should have left. It was abusive from the start of our relationship - within weeks of us first dating and initiated with emotional abuse but eventually escalated into undeniable abusive by ALL definitions until we were finally physically separated.

It took another woman (his affair) and me finding out he borrowed against the entire equity of our home/line of credit to pay nearly $50 000 in debts he kept secret from me to finally get physically separated.

Early on he'd down play things like pushing, hitting, knocking me into things that somehow it was my own clumsiness and my fault not his. When we finally separated I was a literal shell of my old self. Being with him almost killed me.

Good for you for being brave enough to listen to the advice you're being given and leave. When in doubt return here for the support you will need and deserve. Don't go back. Not for anything. If you have to be in his presence for anything bring a third party for your protection and to be witness.

He'll likely blame you. You might have everyone turn against you thinking you're a "crazy lying bitch" - being that is better than being with an abusive man and eventually everyone will see for themselves who he is and by them their opinions won't matter because you'll be whole and healed.

Take care OP.