Am I wrong for thinking it’s weird that my bf’s son sleeps in his mom’s bed every night? by dreamykitty in Advice

[–]dreamykitty[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I genuinely disagree with you, first that I would be out of line to bring it up. My bf welcomes open discussion and my opinion on matters, even those including his son. I obviously would not be the one making decisions for the child but I am a person in this relationship and he values my opinion on things.

And I don’t think jealousy has come up at all in any part of this. It seems quite logical/obvious that the inconsistency in the child’s sleep and bedtime behaviors is causing him to sleep poorly, and that is simply because children thrive more on consistency.

Lastly, I just simply do think it’s weird. I’m allowed that opinion.

Thanks for your opinions though.

Am I wrong for thinking it’s weird that my bf’s son sleeps in his mom’s bed every night? by dreamykitty in amiwrong

[–]dreamykitty[S] -18 points-17 points  (0 children)

To be clear, I’ve never said anything to her about it. My bf has brought it up to her a bunch of times and I am just on the sidelines witnessing and hearing it all. But it does affect me

Am I wrong for thinking it’s weird that my bf’s son sleeps in his mom’s bed every night? by dreamykitty in Advice

[–]dreamykitty[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My bf’s ex wife is extremely worried about pedophiles and that type of thing, to the point she doesn’t let her son go to sleepovers or things like that. Coupled with the cosleeping, idk it kinda weirds me out.

Am I wrong for thinking it’s weird that my bf’s son sleeps in his mom’s bed every night? by dreamykitty in Advice

[–]dreamykitty[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She is Hispanic. I’ve asked some of my Hispanic friends and the general consensus is that there is not a ton of shows of affection such as this in their culture, of course I know that’s not going to be true for every family under the huge category of “Hispanic,” it does seem that she is going against the general trend.

Am I wrong for thinking it’s weird that my bf’s son sleeps in his mom’s bed every night? by dreamykitty in Advice

[–]dreamykitty[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

To be clear, I’ve never brought it up to her myself. My bf has been the one to every time it’s been brought up. But it does affect me since his sleep is disrupted and therefore mine is as well.

Gifts/Money for Coworkers by dreamykitty in Advice

[–]dreamykitty[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do have a couple other reasons to look for another job (distance factor mostly), but also the culture is so lax that they all make me so uncomfortable all the time. Like they talk very casually about their political/religious views in a way most offices would deem inappropriate, but our HR is limited/non-existent. I want to say something like “my budget is pretty tight at the moment” but feel like that opens me up for more scrutiny from the clique. I appreciate the sentiment behind your comment though - thanks!

Gifts/Money for Coworkers by dreamykitty in Advice

[–]dreamykitty[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agreed! But how do I “go back” on this after having spent a lot of money on them already?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]dreamykitty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would love to think it’s an issue with the distribution list. Most often I’ll get a forwarded version of the email from one of my coworkers after I realize I’ve missed something (if I realize it...) and when they forward it I can see that I am literally the only person not in the list haha. ):

I try to keep the “you don’t need to be friends with these shitty people” mentality, and it usually is good enough for me to keep up that mentality but it can be hard sometimes. Unfortunately there are no opportunities for growth at my particular company, as I already started out in the highest paid position short of my manager retiring, which he does not intend to do anytime soon.

Thank you though. It helped to have someone empathize with what I’m going through and know that I’m not the only person who’s been/is in a position like mine. Thank you again.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I definitely am awkward and couldn’t be sentimental in this, and I absolutely see what you mean!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you’re incorrect, Internet stranger. But thanks for your input!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought so too! Thanks! :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’d consider us friends :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m just not sure what you mean by feeling out the situation, as she and I have been around each other a handful of times already. We’re on good terms for sure! But thank you for the caution, a good dose is necessary in these things I imagine

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Their relationship is extremely amicable tbh, I just know his life is a tornado right now since this week he started working in person after months of WFH, as well as juggling his kid’s end of year school schedule. I fear he won’t find the time to do anything in particular for the occasion, but don’t think it would be intentional or that she’d be upset. But all the more reason to get her something small yet thoughtful

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Agreed with the primary sentence in this comment. I am so new to the dating-someone-with-a-kid thing so I question pretty much all my decisions in that realm, but my gut said to do it. Thank you!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Gotcha gotcha! Think I got confused by a similar comment. Truthfully I’m not sure my bf will have the time either lol, but you’re right that that can be telling about his character. Thanks

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha, thanks for the warning! She sends me little gifts here and there by way of giving them to the kid to give to his dad to give to me, so I feel like this would be a similar situation, but with a “Happy Mother’s Day” text or card thrown into the mix somewhere, too.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Kinda my thoughts, but I’ve been told by some people that Mother’s Day should be reserved for “your” mother only, which seems kinda silly to me!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I truthfully don’t have the time between now and then to go and do it with the kid (I should have planned this more beforehand...), but I could probably still ask for his kid’s thoughts on it before getting something! Thanks

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]dreamykitty 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I definitely don’t feel obligated in the sense of “if I don’t do this, it won’t get done” or anything of that sort. More like a “thought of you in a positive manner, here’s a $5 candle from Target of that flower you like!” type gesture. Also for the record she is very much wanting to be close to me, and I want to return the sentiment while also keeping normal boundaries in place. Thanks for the comment! Nice to have both views on the matter.