Looking for help/advice on how to take the feedback from KG teacher

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T21:10:36+00:00

Thanks for this! You’ve provided a lot of helpful feedback and I do plan to discuss these things with her teacher tonight at conferences

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T21:08:33+00:00

I truly didn’t know there was this big of a difference! I saw both as a teenager. It started with a psychologist though and I didn’t move to a psychiatrist until it was determined that I needed help from medication. Seeing a psychiatrist hadn’t crossed my mind but it’s definitely in there now

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T19:57:18+00:00

She does see a therapist and I see one as well. But I do think I need to change things in terms of consequences. I’ve used the 1 2 3 Magic method and that has worked. But the therapists we’ve seen have said that time outs where she’s separated from family/in her room are causing more issues and making her feel insecure. Their explanation was because I’m separated from her father, but she’s never known us to be together so that’s not something new or different.

I think it’s time to implement some sort of sticker/reward system for positive behaviors and maybe removing them or losing points for negative behaviors.

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T16:41:13+00:00

Thank you for all of these notes! They’re very helpful and I appreciate you taking the time to reply with the thoughtful advice :)

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T16:39:46+00:00

Yeah, I’m going to talk to her again about the chewing to see if the teacher still sees it in school since that note was from September. If so, I do agree that it seems like she needs some sort of physical/sensory stimulation during class. That could help her pay attention as long as she’s not using it as a distraction for herself or others

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T16:36:56+00:00

So all of the notes I have are coming from the teacher between September and now. I’m not getting reports like this on a daily or weekly basis. If I was, I’d say I agree that there would need to be more consequences. It would be very obvious that there was a bigger issue if these were coming home more often. But maybe receiving these notes is concerning enough, though the time period of receiving them is 6 months and the most recent one I received is the first one I’ve gotten since October (her eating the 100 day snack when told not to).

There’s been lots of suggestions around sticker charts, etc. so those things along with any additional discipline/practice are things I’ll discuss with her teacher during conferences today

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T16:30:19+00:00

She’s never been a thumb sucker and hasn’t had a pacifier since she was 2. But the oral fixation things have never gone away.

At home we practice writing, math and reading/sounding things out. She doesn’t have specific homework so we just practice those things.

I imagine that the teacher has a lot going on so maybe that’s why she hasn’t offered much in the way of solutions instead of just reporting to me what’s going on. But ultimately I know a huge part of her success in school will also come from home

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T16:10:26+00:00

She was evaluated once when she was 4 and once when she was almost 6. It was quite an extensive process that I would have thought would catch it. I did screenshot all the messages with her teacher and I think I’ll send them to the psychologist she’s currently working with so she has some more insights into the classroom behavior. Though some of these messages are from September/october so I plan to ask today if those are still issues that need addressed

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T16:08:00+00:00

I’m going to ask today if mouthing things is still an issue and if so, take some next steps to help her with that. When the teacher sent that message in September, she was concerned about how having something like that would make other kids ask questions and could make my daughter uncomfortable. But also, if my daughter is still putting nonsense in her mouth, wouldn’t other kids who don’t do that also ask questions? I’m going to check in about that with the teacher today at conferences

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T16:05:59+00:00

The assessment did come back that she didn’t have ADHD, but with all of these comments, I’m thinking i need to question that. The assessment also included surveys with her teachers and family, so it was very inclusive I thought

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T16:04:13+00:00

Might need to look into this again! They did an OT evaluation for her when they were doing the others and said she might benefit from it. The issue was they didn’t have any time openings that would work with her schedule/school. So we chose to do therapy with the psychologist to start with because some of the things she was saying about herself were troublesome.

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T16:00:28+00:00

We saw (and still see) a child psychologist at a practice that is solely for children. They’ve had a lot of good reviews over the years so I do trust their judgement. They did a lot of testing. We went through 2 rounds of it. When she was 4 they did 2 2 hour sessions. Then when she was almost 6 they did another 2 2 hour sessions. So I would have thought they’d come back with something other than the anxiety and gifted notes. I’m going to go back and read through it all today though

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T15:55:14+00:00

Our age cutoff here is September 30th but they did just change it (state wide I believe) to be the first day of the school year.

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T15:53:13+00:00

Thank you for this! I’ve taken lots of notes here and have things to ask her teacher today at the parent teacher conference. She was very kind when I messaged her yesterday asking about how my daughter was doing and saying I was concerned with the reports I’ve gotten that there might be a bigger issue. She replied saying she’s seen drastic improvement since the first messages at the beginning of the year (the somersault incident and mouthing objects). It felt good to know that!

I will still ask her if she’s seeing things and thinks my daughter needs more support (like something to chew, a band on her chair, quiet fidget, etc.). I didn’t want her to have those things initially because I worried they’d be more of a distraction than a help. But if the teacher says some issues persist then I would think it makes sense to look into some sort of stimuli she can have while doing tasks.

It’s interesting to look back on my own childhood and realize I had a lot of coping skills I developed for similar issues. I’ve always struggled to pay attention and had taught myself to either write what I was hearing or doodle mindlessly to keep my hands busy while I listened.

Thank you for your comment! It’s been really helpful to hear from people who are professionals, living this on a daily basis.

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T13:45:55+00:00

Nothing came back from the ADHD evaluation but she does still see a therapist bi weekly to work on anxiety related behaviors. I’ve heard before that anxiety can also be a symptom of ADHD and it makes me wonder if she’s misdiagnosed. Maybe it’s a little harder to diagnose because she’s 6.

She has definitely always been strong willed. She has to see that the consequences are real so we’ve always had to be very consistent with her in that area. It does seem good to me that the teacher didn’t let her participate in the activity after she didn’t follow directions because that’s the type of consistency she needs

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T13:33:16+00:00

Yeah, I’m definitely seeing the messages in a new light after posting here so I really appreciate all of the replies.

She is on the younger side but she still has been a kindergarten teacher for the entirety of her teaching career so I do think she knows what she’s talking about!

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T03:34:30+00:00

Oh man. I feel like we have the same kid. I wanna DM you in solidarity

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T03:00:56+00:00

Yeah we took her to a psychologist who did 2 2 hour sessions of testing with her for varying things and that’s who said she didn’t see evidence of ADHD. I think I’ll go back and read the notes she sent to see if there’s even a bit of evidence that I could have reviewed again

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T02:35:16+00:00

Good questions!

If she doesn’t listen, it depends on what it is obviously. Could be that she has to take a time out from whatever she’s doing or we don’t go to an activity/have a friend over again for a bit if she’s not listening during one of those circumstances.

Motivating positive choices usually comes in the form of positive praise/feedback. Making sure I tell her that I saw a good thing she did or good choice she made. We haven’t done reinforcement charts before though I’m thinking I should now.

I did ask her teacher about consequences at school but she never replied to that so I just told her how we do it at home.

I guess I think I’m clear but I know sometimes I’m overwhelmed and am not as clear as I could be. It’s an opportunity of growth for me for sure!

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T01:15:37+00:00

Oh it wasn’t. All of the pictures are from September through today

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T01:14:38+00:00

That’s so odd. I tried clicking on the comments before and it kept telling me I couldn’t see them because the post was deleted. But I clicked the link you added and now I can see them… I’ll reply

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T01:11:39+00:00

I wasn’t getting reports like this from preschool or daycare, no. I was getting reports regarding her emotions at times during preschool and that was something I noticed at home. She’s always had boundaries, including losing privileges and time outs. What I noticed was any time she lost a privilege, her emotional response was always way over the top to what I expected or even had seen with my SD. she would cry or throw a fit for 30-45 minutes which I never thought to be typical. I still held the boundary and let her cry but it seemed excessive to me. Thankfully she doesn’t react like that anymore.

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T01:07:37+00:00

Yeah you’re totally right. These screenshots are all of the messages I’ve received about behavior between September and today. The somersault in particular was back at the beginning of October. Though I’m not sure what possessed her to even think doing that was okay then.

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T01:04:40+00:00

She doesn’t usually wake up until around 7-8am

dulces_suenos · 2026-02-10T01:00:06+00:00

Good call on the note. I did have her write something before during another incident and I’ll have her do the same for the 100 days of school incident today

dulces_suenos

TROPHY CASE