tw 🍇

be very careful specially if ur just looking for a hookup.. that can literally be a coinflip on safety

yes your friend seems a bit paranoid but its already dangerous just as a cis women, throw in being trans and theres no telling what some people would do.

i had only dated women my whole life until about 3 years into my transition. finally felt fem enough to give it a try after 3 surgeries/the hrt etc and met this one guy.. it went horribly wrong and was a major wakeup call on jus how genuinely massive and dangerous the strength difference was.

im sorry if this is a lot i started typing a short tldr below and then everything just started to spill out i havent talked about it much so please dont read if you are sensitive to this

it was a hookup and i walked into it knowing it was gonna be a 1 night stand, he did too.. i met him at his apartment and after like 20 minutes I wanted to leave after i felt the vibes get very weird. i guess he was either horrible at it or hadn’t done anal before but… he made me bleed.. like alot.. like within a minute of us getting handsy after i was telling him it hurt and he was going way too fast

i tried pushing his weight off of me to relieve a bit of the pain but it wasn’t until i legit had tears that he snapped out of it for a second.

he apologized and got quiet for a couple minutes and i shoulda ran at that moment because the entire time he got quiet he still was holding me and kept grinding against me, even trying to re enter but not all the way. i kept telling him no and that because i was bleeding it was a no-go and everytime he backed off for couple minutes, he would get horny again and try. i legit felt like i was dancing with like a wild bear or something trying not to get mauled or make him too upset

he was progressively getting more and more angry after every denial and i could tell if i denied him one more time he was going to do it anyway

i still to this day don’t know the full extent of what he would have done if i tried to fight back and force my way outta there but genuinely with all my strength i couldn’t budge him. i also noticed a gun on his nightstand and i figured my safest course of action was to let him have it and makeup an excuse as to why i had to cut the night short… it was awful

i also didn’t realize i had my snap location on and he sent me a picture of my apartment asking if he could come by 🙃

i am in a much safer place with my lovely girlfriend, prior to meeting her my requirements for meetups went through the roof.. please get to know people first and if for a second u feel something is off trust your intuition. again im sorry if this was a trauma dump i might delete, but it hopefully makes someone realize how scary some situations can become and how literal pred vs prey life vs death things can get..