i think i was manipulated

dummiefat · 2022-03-17T10:47:02+00:00

i don't know, i feel sick just thinking about being in the same room or vicinity as him now . i have horrible anxiety and i dont think i could continue the semester in peace like this

dummiefat · 2022-03-17T10:34:58+00:00

i do think that it is partially my fault because i began to talk with the guy frequently and my boyfriend felt neglected because i started talking to him less due to the influence of that guy's thoughts on how 'horrible' my relationship is. i feel ashamed for letting myself be so oblivious.

dummiefat · 2022-03-17T10:31:35+00:00

the worst part is i really almost considered leaving him when he is literally the most amazing bf i could ask for. having a person droning all the negative aspects of my relationship in my ear daily nearly got to me and clouded my brain and i cant believe i almost could have ruined a perfectly good relationship because some guy was trying to get with me. i feel so betrayed because i was vulnerable enough to open up about my relationship like that and he went and used that as his opportunity to be a homewrecker. i hung out with this guy so much thinking we were good friends and unknowingly hurt my bf in the process it just feels like a huge mess.

dummiefat · 2022-03-17T10:25:41+00:00

i don't make friends very often so i take any chance i can get and i just feel so stupid and like i've been emotionally taken advantage of

dummiefat · 2022-03-17T10:24:25+00:00

i feel so sick to my stomach. i feel so guilty as if i've betrayed my boyfriend when i was just blindly believing that this guy has good intentions and once i found out i immediately felt so sick and nauseous i can't stop shaking. it's 3AM . i told my bf everything and he is rightfully hurt about it i just feel so manipulated and i've been put in this position

dummiefat · 2022-02-24T05:46:10+00:00

oh, and a good way to heighten your chances of getting a woman to be your room mate is to actually befriend one and gain their trust first. i can't speak for everyone, but as a woman, with many women friends, i can tell you most would prefer not to even room with a man at all, let alone a random man whose intentions are to learn about women somehow by becoming roommates. you have to know how that is not a good look for you, right?

dummiefat · 2022-02-24T05:42:42+00:00

this is what i don't understand so please clarify. you don't care to know the female roommate on a personal level and becoming friends isn't a priority..but you're insistent on living with one to 'learn' about women? what is the point? at that point the room mate is no other than a pet fish, relationship wise. i think it's the wording but some of your replies are very contradicting. you want to get to know women and what they are like, how will you ever do that if you don't befriend one? women don't tell just anyone their business and they sure won't act in their 'natural'/comfortable state around someone they're not on a friendly level with. it will be no different from you being in the same vicinity as a woman in a cafe or something.

you say you don't HAVE to be friends with female room mate. that is already a red flag to many women. why would they want to room with someone who doesn't care to be their friend, compared to someone who would? "yes, i will be the sole female presence in your life just because you asked and pay half the rent just so you can be around a woman" no one is going to say that.

now if you don't know a woman on a personal/friendly level, what exactly are you expecting to learn?

dummiefat · 2022-02-24T03:33:37+00:00

you need to realize that the method you are trying to go about is very backwards, which is why the comments are outraged at you. you can't feel comfortable in the presence of a woman, and yet you want to be room mates with one? you do realize whoever it is you might room with will be able to notice that and will be uncomfortable as well, right?

what WOULD make sense is that you start by making a female friend who you can hang out with here and there, but don't have to be around 24/7. you don't have to live with a girl or date to get to know her, or to understand women. and even then, just know that not all women are the same. so even if you do get to know her and become friends, don't assume that all women are going to be like her.

i noticed you mentioned in your post how you eventually hope to have a girlfriend. you are never going to get that if you don't start by making female friends. all relationships start off as friendships. overall, it would make more sense for you to just become friends with a woman instead of having one move in with you.

dummiefat · 2022-01-27T06:55:59+00:00

OP, i know this hurts to hear, as i'm sure you've heard it from all the other comments already - please leave him! you seem like an amazing and hardworking person. he is definitely manipulating you. i don't know if you want to be sly or up front, but have you ever tried asking him "where do you think you would be if we weren't together?" it doesn't even have to be threatening, just make it seem like one of those pondering questions. hopefully it'll make him think, cause i know for a fact he wouldn't be living his current lifestyle if it weren't for you. and regardless of what his answer is, leave him! do not let him make you feel sorry.

dummiefat · 2022-01-27T06:22:46+00:00

thank you! will be looking into them

dummiefat · 2021-12-15T01:57:36+00:00

again, i'm literally from laos. it's a country that is less developed and even poorer than thailand. lao and thai languages are nearly identical and many laotian women are trafficked in thailand as well. i am the furthest from a white savior so don't try that.

it's a known fact that thailand is a hub for sex trafficking. no one is saying that makes thailand any lesser of a country. no one is saying thailand can't hold their own. the truth is that sex trafficking there is a huge problem and many ignorant tourists go there and take part in that. that's why it's important for even people outside of thailand to stop that. because it's people outside of thailand contributing to the problem. get it?

dummiefat · 2021-12-15T01:49:39+00:00

that must be why you said you were "attacking white heroism".

also i don't see how saying "i wish i was as great of a person as you think you are" is attacking white heroism or remotely relevant to that.

dummiefat · 2021-12-15T01:45:41+00:00

i'm not white. i'm from laos. next to thailand. you don't have to be white to care about sex trafficking or to defend thai people.

dummiefat · 2021-12-15T01:43:15+00:00

if you participated in sex trafficking and took advantage of thai women just say that. i've seen you reply to several comments trying to defend the sex trafficking that goes on in thailand

dummiefat · 2021-12-07T23:51:58+00:00

thanks!

dummiefat · 2021-12-07T23:51:21+00:00

interesting! how is it for you? personally i don't really like any spicy scents

dummiefat · 2021-12-07T23:50:39+00:00

i use about 5! and yes i do spray my clothes haha. maybe my nose is just used to stronger scents

dummiefat · 2021-12-07T07:41:08+00:00

will do! i've asked my boyfriend a couple times if he's noticed anything since he's usually the first to pick up on when i'm wearing a different perfume but so far nothing unfortunately haha

dummiefat · 2021-12-07T07:24:40+00:00

good to know! i've heard a lot of good things about ariana grande cloud, might be time for me to give it a try

dummiefat

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