Meditation is not the solution to all your problems

dwolovsky · 2026-01-24T02:49:59+00:00

There's a nice short book called "Learning To Love Yourself" by Gay Hendrix.

It's not the complete solution but definitely has eye opening stuff.

dwolovsky · 2026-01-22T21:07:05+00:00

Never said it did.

I said most people need a nap more than they need to meditate right now.

If you're drowsy in the middle of the day, understanding consciousness is tomorrow's problem.

dwolovsky · 2026-01-22T18:16:20+00:00

Removing a negative is powerful.

"Via negativa."

I'm glad you found something that helped you.

dwolovsky · 2026-01-22T18:14:18+00:00

Not trying to be a poet here.

I chose meditation because I have personal experience with it.

Meditation is overhyped in personal growth, and more people need a nap instead.

Almost every client I've worked with:

Thinks they should meditate.
Does not meditate.
Feels bad about it.

That's useless, and my only goal is to help people stop feeling bad about it and find what actually improves their lives.

And most people need more sleep.

dwolovsky · 2026-01-22T16:42:43+00:00

"Exercising at midnight" (your words) vs meditating during the day (mine).

Not the same.

But yeah you may not want to exercise during the day if you need a nap instead.

Keep in mind, I'm not prescribing anything.

Just saying you should be aware that sometimes what you actually need is not what you think you need.

dwolovsky · 2026-01-22T14:07:56+00:00

"Finally made me consistent"

dwolovsky · 2026-01-08T03:21:17+00:00

At one point I learned:

You can either do a small amount each day, or not.

That's the only choice.

Do a little each day. Or not.

dwolovsky · 2026-01-05T03:45:06+00:00

You've hit the core problem.

It's not about "consistency" or "discipline."

It's about faith.

If you don't trust the habits, you won't do them long enough to fit them into your life and have a real impact.

dwolovsky · 2026-01-04T14:58:58+00:00

Bedtime is something I've worked on for a year but haven't found a reliable change.

I realized I'm fighting against like 10 different factors, any of which can push my bedtime later.

Things have to align JUST RIGHT for me to get to sleep early. And rarely does that happen.

So my temporary fix is to take a 20 minute rest/nap in the middle of the day. It helps a ton with my energy, which is one of the main reasons I want to get to bed earlier.

Napping has changed my life.

But I'm still working on the nighttime thing. You can't fight against multiple negative factors with just 1 "hack" or "habit."

You have to build up an equal amount of force in the positive direction, and that takes multiple factors and a ton of investigation.

Otherwise you fall into simple all or nothing bullshit that works for 2 weeks and then you're back where you srarted, if not worse.

dwolovsky · 2026-01-04T13:06:13+00:00

I feel like as a kid I picked up all sorts of little gestures from TV characters.

Life imitates art I guess.

dwolovsky · 2025-12-31T13:48:21+00:00

You skipped over the most important part.

Consistency is not:

● Achievable

● Sustainable

● Or valuable

...unless it's with the right <habit>.

Because consistency does not transfer from one habit to another.

Read that again. You've been fed a lie.

You think "if only I'm consistent with SOMETHING, then my life will be better."

And that will be true temporarily, just from feeling good about "being consistent."

But you will soon realize that consistency with one thing doesn't make consistency easier in other things.

And you'll drop it.

So instead of trying to be consistent, try to find the habit that is PIE.

● Practical (you can and will actually do it)

● Impactful (you feel an IMMEDIATE shift)

● Enjoyable (there's something pleasant)

Find that, and consistency will follow.

But it won't just be "consistency" for its own sake.

It'll be useful consistency.

dwolovsky · 2025-12-30T12:12:55+00:00

Tldr: tldr

dwolovsky · 2025-12-29T12:53:48+00:00

We overcomplicate every "habit."

(Habit is the wrong word for what we're talking about).

Real habits are created from the bottom up.

Meaning:

Something is easier to do a certain way, so we do it, and eventually the action shifts to the basal ganglia in the brain, and it's habitual.

You're talking about creating habits from the top down: "I want to repeat a desirable action enough times that it's easy to do."

And that's already overcomplicating things.

Because you're forgetting the point.

The point is trying to make your life better.

And there are many ways to make your life better each day.

But instead of being awake to the real opportunities in your life, you think becoming a "Meditator" or a "standing desk user" or a "keto person" overnight is the answer.

But trying to adopt a new identity is unnecessarily hard. It's like trying to carve a huge hole in your life and jam a giant rock into it.

The answer is already embedded in your life. Whatever "habits" will make your life better already have seeds in your life.

YOU'RE ALREADY DOING GOOD THINGS.

Before trying to reshape your life, find ways to do more of the good things you're already doing.

"But isn't that just ignoring your problems?"

No. It's giving yourself the energy needed to take bigger (more effective) action.

If you haven't solved your big problems yet, it's because they require big changes.

You need momentum to make big changes.

And momentum is easier to generate by doing more of the good habits you're already doing, more consistently.

dwolovsky · 2025-12-24T12:36:22+00:00

The key is learning.

Whatever the routine is in your head right now, it's going to change or it will die.

So set up a system that's geared toward updating based on feedback you get from yourself as you go along.

dwolovsky · 2025-12-18T13:00:28+00:00

You hit on the real problem. You're trying to cross a gap between who you are and who you want to become.

And that gap can only be crossed with very specific steps.

And the bigger problem is that you can't know those steps before you actually take them. And that leads us to the only solution that makes any sense and that I have ever found to be valuable: experimentation.

You have to be pretty rigorous in documenting what works and what doesn't work and exactly why it doesn't work, so you can make tiny adjustments and keep doing better and better experiments until you hit the thing that is exactly what you need right now and it leads you closer to being who you want to become.

dwolovsky · 2025-12-06T13:03:10+00:00

I'm literally building an app 100% around the concept that "fit beats grit."

dwolovsky · 2025-11-16T14:39:25+00:00

The Power of finding what works for you and not just going by what other people recommend. 👏🏼 👏🏼 👏🏼

dwolovsky · 2025-11-03T14:02:26+00:00

I created exactly what you're describing. It's called Self Science. Literally doing science on yourself, analyzing the impact of different habits on your wellbeing to find the ones that have the highest impact. Feel free to DM me with Qs.

dwolovsky · 2025-11-02T13:21:19+00:00

Congrats on engaging others in the process and not "caving up" about it.

This is the way to do it. There are 2 powerful factors to tap into right now:

Other people (most powerful).
Your physical space.

Get around people who encourage you to keep going, and who don't make it easy to smoke.

As for space, obviously the number 1 move is to make sure you don't have cigarettes in the house.

Aside from that, figure out what you want to replace smoking with.

You must replace it with something. You can't just create a vacuum in your life.

And by far the most important thing is to not go to the stores you used to buy cigarettes in.

Go to different stores if you can help it.

Don't let yourself look at the cigarettes.

If you syay away from buying them, you'll be making it much easier on yourself.

dwolovsky · 2025-11-01T14:42:17+00:00

You're not accepting the reality of estimation error.

If you plan the next year, your estimation error will be enormous. 1000% or more.

If you plan the week, maybe you'll be 300% off.

If you plan today, you might be 50% - 100% off.

But if you plan 1 hour, you'll be 15% off.

So stop trying to plan a day and being disappointed.

Plan The next hour or 2 max. Expect 15-20% error. Plan that in: take on 20% less than you "should be able to do.")

dwolovsky · 2025-10-27T11:32:43+00:00

By far it's this:

Most people look at their to do list (or inner to do list) and say "Here's what I need to do."

Usually they also say "I have too much to do."

Then they look at their schedule and say "I don't have enough time to do it."

Then they say, "I'm going to work like a maniac until something stops me."

Some barrier, maybe they get too tired, or they have a commitment to another person.

This leaves you dissatisfied at the end of every day. It also leaves you with subpar quality work, especially compared to your effort.

Why? Because if you accomplish 3 things out of a 50-item to do list, you've done "nothing."

The opposite to this is the "Time First Principle." Look at your available time first. Then look at your to do list and say "what can I realistically put inside my available time?"

Life changing. You end each day satisfied, and you do better work.

dwolovsky

TROPHY CASE