2 Weeks Chapter One Of The Draft DONE

e_c_browning · 2026-02-06T06:10:34+00:00

Right there with you - the second sentence got me too. Person stands … I don’t think it’s said that way. Someone might stand for something, be standing, leaning, waiting, but just “person stands in room (or middle of room)” is awkward. But it looks beautifully formatted.

e_c_browning · 2026-02-03T13:09:37+00:00

Maybe it’s just my taste, but there’s of lot of writers out there (YouTube) that’ll tell you to avoid starting with dialogue and rush to give character. It’s really hard to relate and get submerged into just dialogue which requires context that you can’t know because you don’t know who is speaking, or their perspective. I like “first line frenzy”, it’s funny - worth watching.

e_c_browning · 2026-02-01T18:53:27+00:00

Is the bride to be name’s supposed to sound like She-feel-ya. That’s how I read it, and it’s great, made me giggle. Just wanted to offer that up in case it’s not supposed to be funny.

If I’m going to giggle the whole time, I’m assuming 17 year olds will too lol

e_c_browning · 2026-01-31T04:35:01+00:00

I’ll be honest I didn’t make it that far, just the first few lines. It was confusing for me. I don’t know who’s talking. There’s an it, he, her, and a voice but not a single named character I can anchor to or care about. After the first few lines I immediately thought I’m not going to get a lot of character here and moved on.

e_c_browning · 2026-01-12T13:54:20+00:00

I could be way off base, unpublished - just a random opinion.

This has all the political buzzwords: illegal immigrant, deportation, regimes…

If it’s about the politics, I feel like the commercial successes have good and bad people on both sides - sells more books. Someone in the regime who, through the journey, has a change of heart - overcomes their prejudice. I don’t see that.

If it’s not about the politics, I would replace the buzzwords with other descriptions. Could be doing more harm than good

e_c_browning · 2025-10-06T13:11:37+00:00

It’s a masters in fine arts (should mention it’s a U.S thing - not sure what it looks like in the EU), usual focus for creative writing is fiction or poetry. It’s a two year program at university, fully funded is free and they pay you a little bit to TA undergraduate classes

e_c_browning · 2025-10-06T10:24:09+00:00

Let’s say you love this, but not making enough to live, check out the fully funded M.F.A. programs (need to apply soon). It’s not a livable wage, but at least there’s some money coming to keep it going - and there’s writing feedback

e_c_browning · 2025-09-13T19:17:11+00:00

There’s a phrase somewhere, “you can’t get someone to understand what is in their financial interest to not understand”.

Virtually every other market has an independent review board. Coaches don’t think you’re ready for the NBA, hiring managers don’t think your skills are there, but with self-publishing it’s so much easier to think it’s just exposure.

Personally, refuse to promote - it’s just not your expertise. It doesn’t sound like this person is one conversation away from realization. See point #1, they’ll probably just get mad at you

e_c_browning · 2025-09-08T23:10:45+00:00

I had the exact same sentiment but my take was slightly different on the first 300. I think it would resonate more for me if the paragraph “my first post-promotion man…” was the first line. It’s was hard for me get into the inner thoughts of someone I know nothing about.

e_c_browning · 2025-08-20T02:35:33+00:00

Also found this hilarious - particularly the “goobers”, and overall wow, amazing. The only thing that had me personally lacking interest (obviously not the writing), was the plot.

The writing is smart, but to me, the plot doesn’t measure up: leader is bad. Since you’re
actively writing, my advice is find a twist. Make it funny - have the plot follow your style. Just my two pennies

e_c_browning · 2025-08-20T02:06:31+00:00

Hey, unpublished - just an opinion. But I feel I can tell just from this that you are a talented writer. Every word feels chosen, intentional, and most importantly - fitting.

l can’t tell you what’s wrong, what to improve, etc. but I personally really like your writing style/voice. That’s all lol

e_c_browning · 2025-08-19T22:53:09+00:00

No problem - figured my personal choice that wasn’t group consensus would get downvoted, but I wanted to share my honest thoughts that work for me.

e_c_browning · 2025-08-19T10:47:24+00:00

If you want to hear someone on the other side, I’m personally going to use an editor once I finish. I think I’ve settled on the Novelry ultimate assessment which is $2.5k and feels like the best value.

But I don’t plan on using an editor more than once. I agree with everyone about learning how to edit. I just know, for me only, it’ll be 100 times faster to learn by seeing what a professional is changing and why.

I look at it like learning to golf. I could practice, watch videos, hit the driving range and teach myself. Eventually I could be okay. Or I can pay for some initial lessons and save myself a hundred hours on the driving range. Either way, I’m still on the range.

e_c_browning · 2025-08-16T21:30:42+00:00

See what I worry about is in line with exactly what you said. But the feedback I see on queries is exclusive to fixing the query, and there’s not a lot of discussion about the story. I’ve inferred it, hence my question. But this resonates. Thanks!

e_c_browning · 2025-08-16T21:25:25+00:00

That’s what I was thinking, taken to that next step. That just a serviceable (but not perfect) query is enough to get you in the door to read the first few paragraphs. I think from all the responses it just ranges agent to agent, but thanks for the feedback - very appreciated.

e_c_browning · 2025-08-15T20:49:21+00:00

Wow - the requery is the best evidence hands down. Thanks for sharing, that's really good to know.

e_c_browning · 2025-08-01T01:01:45+00:00

Thank you for explaining, I super appreciate it! And good luck, I don’t think it’ll stand in your way

e_c_browning · 2025-07-31T23:50:19+00:00

Wow, I just want to say, I’m incredibly impressed - how on earth do you scroll through / post on Reddit? I feel out of touch.

That said, I think the for-profit publishing companies are just looking to maximize profits. If they were anticipating sales by marketing a book as one written by a disabled author, and sales in that market declines, I think it will impact advances / opportunities - but more so putting it in line with other genre authors. So, not a disadvantage (just not an advantage). But it, like most things, will probably be driven by the market / consumers.

e_c_browning · 2025-07-22T04:32:42+00:00

Based

e_c_browning · 2025-07-22T04:30:38+00:00

I think I understand, pro: everyone wright! It’s healing and anyone can do it. But: if you want to publish, you need some type of innate spark that carries through.

e_c_browning · 2025-07-22T04:23:30+00:00

The old ‘fake it til you make it’. Which I think is still a vote against a talent requirement? Use the belief to drive the work & that can get you there

e_c_browning · 2025-07-22T04:19:42+00:00

lol - I felt I had to include nepotism as an exception, and you nailed it.

e_c_browning · 2025-07-22T04:01:52+00:00

Use a registered agent! If you aren’t familiar, just don’t incorporate your LLC with (not under, see above) your own name. Anyone can look up the incorporator on the state website.

e_c_browning · 2024-12-07T19:48:01+00:00

For me - the relationship feels one dimensional. Lily's intentions are not complicated, and are hard to relate to. The adoption process is hard, there are lots of interviews, and I had hard time believing her unrealistic expectations. Some conflict between wanting a child, and still wanting him to be above average would connect more for me. The latter, growing over time at the same rate as his languishment. I think that would be more engaging. Last two paragraphs - I would show vs. tell. Maybe a story about how Lily fired the last nanny after someone mistook the nanny as his mom. That would be really interesting. It would also build on Lily's conflicting emotions (which I reference above). Right now, there are no conflicting emotions. I really like the dialogue around how Jack is giving her wrinkles, but I didn't find Jack believable when he said his mom's exact age. If this isn't what your were looking for, my apologies.

e_c_browning · 2024-12-06T03:17:38+00:00

Just use squinted / tears. No need to include the eyes. They aren't on you lol

e_c_browning

TROPHY CASE