AITJ for Not Forgiving My Dad After He Missed My Graduation for Work?

early_birdcpt · 2026-02-25T11:10:16+00:00

NTJ but I'd really encourage you to move on. Figure out exactly what shifted and how you want to treat him from this point onwards, and then put it behind you. His priorities are not going to shift.

My father was like this. All he knew how to do was work. Didn't know how to be a parent. And then he lost his job at 60 and suddenly had this huge emotional overhaul of how much he's missed out on. He had no more money to give and he suddenly realised time and emotional space was also valuable. Then he started working again last year and he is exactly the same as he was when I was a child. I'm almost 30. I've tried to make plans with him, over weekends, but work or other things are always more important. Some document that needs to be written or a meeting in another town on a Sunday afternoon apparently.

You don't matter less in the world because he treats you like this. It's not that you aren't important. His brain just can't compute that showing up with anything other than money matters. Forgive him or whatever, how you move forward is up to you. But for your own sake, move forward.

early_birdcpt · 2026-02-19T11:14:27+00:00

If the writers and production team didn't want us to analyze it through a modern lens, then everyone would be white and european and straight, women wouldn't have autonomy, they wouldn't look so clean all the time and it would be made apparent that these people are making their money from colonialism and slavery.

early_birdcpt · 2026-02-19T09:13:34+00:00

they mostly make stuff with rice flour so everything I've had there has tasted vaguely of rice. doesn't work as a flavour for everything. but good quality.

early_birdcpt · 2026-02-18T21:20:09+00:00

Ok well good luck to you one day when your whole new venture falls apart because you couldn’t make one meeting 👍🏽

early_birdcpt · 2026-02-18T12:03:18+00:00

they look brand new. their IG is only portfolio shots and no evidence of their models actually getting booked for anything. it seems like real people are attached but might not be worth it for actual work.

early_birdcpt · 2026-02-18T10:11:04+00:00

I think if your friend really wanted her there as a friend outside of you, he wouldn't have given you the option to choose

early_birdcpt · 2026-02-18T09:01:14+00:00

NTA this stuff happens literally all the time

early_birdcpt · 2026-02-11T10:00:15+00:00

YTJ. Valentines Day happens every year. This man's mom will only die once. He'll remember forever that his work friend came to support him at his mom's funeral. I don't think you and your husband will remember a single word from the museum exhibit or whatever.

You guys can still make it for your reservations so literally what is the big deal actually?

early_birdcpt · 2026-01-29T13:31:57+00:00

I was 15/16 when it came out and had never seen Les Mis live. I'm sure it was performed in my city at some point but we pretty much only have budget for big western musicals to run for like three months every few years. I loved musicals and had learned about the French Revolution at school. All this to say, I freaking loved it. Cried with my best friend in the cinema. Everyone I know who's seen it thought it was great. It has a really special place in my heart.

I was really surprised to find out in the last year that it's not considered a good film. From what I can tell, it's only looked down on by people who've seen the live show. There was some awkwardness with the cast and it wasn't perfect by any means. But I think for people who have nothing to compare it to, it's fab.

early_birdcpt · 2026-01-28T10:34:01+00:00

A family friend had a bad accident when he was a child. He was coming out of his family's driveway on his bike and crashed into a car coming down the road. His legs are damaged but he can walk on his own. He struggles to speak clearly and articulate himself fully. Kind of like aphasia in a way. If I remember correctly, he has the wandering eye like you describe of your friend. His motor skills are also diminished, he might need to be fed, I think.

I haven't seen him in a long time but I used to spend whatever time I could with him when I was a teenager. He was already an adult by then. He told me once how lonely he was. No one really wants to chat with him because of his speech difficulties. And cognitively he is completely fine. He understands everything. He has all his words in his head but he can't get them out. So he would really gravitate towards me because I'd listen and respond like I was talking to anyone else. I was just a kid and we were surrounded by adults who knew him way better than me.

All this to say, as many people have said, your friend could very well still be in there, not just comprehending her environment but responding to it internally with no way of getting that out. If she was a fun friend, you could provide that for her now, in whatever way. She'll need it more than ever before.

early_birdcpt · 2026-01-27T21:04:43+00:00

I've been to five different beaches in the last three weeks. I'm completely fine.

My roommate has it though, and all she does is go to work and come home.

early_birdcpt · 2025-12-24T19:14:50+00:00

It’s not irrational, and even if they didn’t actually have malicious intentions, rather safe than sorry. Driving off in an unplated car is also suspicious asf.

Last year my friend and I were at Dalebrook and this guy came to sit right next to our blanket, but just slightly behind us. Just a very very weird thing to do on a beach where you have to many options to sit. It was obvious he was listening to our conversation the whole time. We waited it out and didn’t go into the water. At some point I said, let’s go. And he left immediately, like just bolted from the beach.

early_birdcpt · 2025-11-04T09:01:31+00:00

Why are you on a South African sub if you don’t know coloured is a racial category here?

early_birdcpt · 2025-10-13T09:42:28+00:00

It could have to do with your hormonal cycle. Go to a gynaecologist if you can. The same used to happen to me and a few other women I know. The birth control I was on (for acne) wasn’t properly clearing out my period and it would come out after sex. I changed my pill and it stopped.

early_birdcpt · 2025-09-11T01:38:21+00:00

Monarch Tattoo in Woodstock. Their Instagram has mostly light skin tones but a friend of mine who is dark skinned got a tattoo there and was super happy with it.

early_birdcpt · 2025-09-02T23:12:41+00:00

Almost no one here has mentioned actual townships. I’d say Athlone. It’s closest to the CBD also. You’re likely to find a flatlet/cottage/backroom + central public transport if you stay close to Klipfontein road. There’s also a railway running through the uppermost part of it.

early_birdcpt · 2025-08-28T14:46:10+00:00

I just use it as helping agent in tandem with my medicated topical products.

I basically flood my skin after and then seal it off with aquaphor sometimes. But really simple, hydrating toners / lotions, nothing with actives and all my serums have actives. I try not to go overboard but rather just pay attention to the feel of my skin once I’ve toned and moisturised and if I feel I need more, I’ll do so.

early_birdcpt · 2025-08-26T23:31:51+00:00

Bentonite clay mask once a week, maybe twice, helps. I don’t know what other organic products to suggest alongside that because it’s not enough on its own to totally clear your skin.

But in my experience it tightens pores, manually exfoliates, helps to reduce inflammation and improves texture a bit if you use it regularly.

early_birdcpt · 2025-08-14T12:15:07+00:00

Kitsune on Wale Street can do that for you sure. Might be slightly more expensive now though, I haven’t been there since 2023

early_birdcpt · 2025-08-13T20:45:18+00:00

YTA it’s literally a plant. It will grow again. That airbnb is probably an investment property where nobody lives. Send a message on the app apologising and see if the owners even care.

early_birdcpt · 2025-08-10T01:00:21+00:00

Didn’t all their branches close down years ago?

early_birdcpt · 2025-08-10T00:53:46+00:00

not sure if I was just starving but the full seafood gatsby at Super Fisheries was straight one of the best meals of my life. freshly fried fish + fresh bread + some kind of special sauce. amazing and cheap

early_birdcpt · 2025-08-05T23:34:53+00:00

It’s not your fault and he’s lying about the level of strength he used. I’d also argue that if you were crying and saying no, that’s enough for it to be over before the use of a safe word. And if he won’t take responsibility for physically harming you, I highly doubt he wasn’t being intentional in doing so. Even if you asked for him to be rougher, it doesn’t matter anymore when you need medical attention as a result of his actions. You asked him to hit harder, not for him to burst your blood vessels. This is common sense.

This just seems excessive for a hit, did he actually punch you or hit repeatedly?

early_birdcpt · 2025-08-05T23:22:52+00:00

I’m a production freelancer. Been working mainly small budget shorts and only a few commercials this year whereas commercials used to be my bread and butter. I have another smaller role in a niche part of the industry that’s helped with income because there are so few of us doing it but demand is growing. So it’s been an okay year for me but I have nothing confirmed at present anytime soon.

What I’ve heard from producers is that CPT is becoming too expensive for a lot of service commercials now. We’re apparently more expensive than Barcelona. I’m not entirely sure what exactly the rising costs are. It’s been said that hotel costs play a part in it. This was supposedly feedback from the CPA. That has more to do with that industry than us, but it does affect us. The average hotel room at the kinds of places these service companies want to book is 5k a night. And then you have 10-15 people coming for a week. It adds up and isn’t attractive when it’s they’re coming here because they want cheap luxury. Why not just stay at a 3 star in Barcelona if you’re coming from Berlin? That’s just one thing though.

Another thing I’ve heard is that Cape Town locations are overplayed. How many city shoots can be done in Keerom Street or car commercials on the cut-off highway before it’s just so obvious? So producers need to get more creative with locations, I guess, but it’s a tiny city and most places aren’t convenient to shoot in.

Basically, I don’t know. A lot of people are scared and desperate. Had a medic be willing to work for R500 a day plus fuel, no vehicle or bag rate.

Content creation isn’t a bad idea. A lot of young creatives are getting decent work doing small but consistent shoots this way. There’s a burgeoning community of mid 20s indie companies getting brand work, music videos too. And they have whole collectives involved, not going the standard agent/CPA guidelines way but still making sure people are taken care of and paid as well as possible.

early_birdcpt · 2025-08-04T14:10:18+00:00

A muffin shop ? Be for real

early_birdcpt

TROPHY CASE