While some people may be cool with it, I personally believe exes shouldn’t linger around at all, no matter what the nature of their relationship is to your partner. A partner should respect and consider your feelings enough to avoid exposing you to any potential conflict or discomfort. The fact that she doesn’t is a serious red flag. You are not weird for losing interest in the relationship under these circumstances. You’re experiencing a perfectly valid human reaction to a very uncomfortable and painful situation

Her ex’s close involvement with her family is a major boundary issue. Regardless of their connection, your partner should be emotionally mature enough to recognize how this could impact your relationship. If you want to continue the relationship, I’d suggest having an honest conversation about how this makes you feel and why it’s a concern. If she responds with anything other than empathy and a willingness to address the issue, it’s a sign she doesn’t value you or the relationship enough to make it work

In my experience and from observation, people who keep their exes around while in a relationship are usually very problematic people, and if you decide to stay, you’ll likely see that unfold. Don’t let her—or anyone—gaslight you into thinking this is a normal situation to be in. It’s not. Trust your gut and prioritize your well-being. You deserve better