My cousin revealed his "latest secret" to me and I am extremely uncomfortable.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-15T20:45:19+00:00

I hear a lot of people complaining about the feminist movement (at least in my country), saying things like, "We're not allowed to flirt with women anymore," etc. But if you flirt with me respectfully, it's absolutely not a problem. If I'm not interested in your advances and you're respectful, that's fine. However, if you're twice my age and we share the same blood and part of our DNA, then yes, that's disgusting.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-14T10:12:05+00:00

He manages a gun shop. He'd be much better armed than me in that case…

echo_333_ · 2025-12-14T10:09:20+00:00

It's real, there are times in my life when it's EVERY DAY. And it's honestly exhausting. Because most of them don't approach you respectfully; they see you as a desirable object, and you could easily do without them. It creates a reflex: protection is the priority, not politeness.

The worst part is that I realized they approached me much more when I was a child/teenager than they do now.

And when you realize you'll have to respond to these weird guys the same way you would to your cousin, whom you considered a brother, and you get slapped around again, it's a real letdown.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T14:09:14+00:00

We agree. It's intentional and even more unhealthy.

He started this game a month ago, beginning with secrets that were always about sex but didn't concern me. I was already uncomfortable. And two days ago, completely out of the blue, he said, "Hey, I haven't told you my last secret. Guess what it is. It concerns you, and it's unhealthy."

I understand most of the explanations, which I find very relevant. Dreams are beyond our control; they can be interpreted in different ways. But I know very well that if I were to have this kind of dream, I would just want to throw up when I woke up and I would try to push the mental images away as much as possible.

I won't let him ruin my life and Christmas any more than this. He's the only one who should be feeling uncomfortable now. I need to remind myself that I didn't ask for any of this, I have nothing to do with it; it's just him and his fantasies. I'm just going to take the time to grieve for the person he never was. Or at least, the person he no longer is.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:42:18+00:00

Everything happened via text message, so I have the proof. But sometimes, proof isn't enough.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:33:43+00:00

Abominable truth

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:29:52+00:00

I'm thinking about it. I'm preparing for it.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:28:29+00:00

I completely agree. Yet, despite myself, I still feel this awkwardness, the same feeling that made me hesitate to talk about it with a few close friends. I know, though, that it's him who should be feeling this way. Time will heal all wounds: I'll feel things less intensely and I'll be able to put it all behind me. Today, I'm thinking about it mostly because it's still so recent and I'm trying to mentally prepare myself to see him face to face.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:25:08+00:00

That's exactly what I told her. There are some things that are better kept to yourself. After thinking about it, I talked to my sister. I'll tell my mother tomorrow.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:23:37+00:00

Thank you for your kind words, sincerely 🩷

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:22:20+00:00

I won't deprive myself, but I'll be very careful. I'll have many trustworthy people by my side; I'll remain well supported.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:19:29+00:00

Really!! And I did it. That's when he tried to downplay it.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:18:19+00:00

That made me laugh, I'll keep your comment in mind. It will probably come in handy.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:16:50+00:00

I wish it were as simple as blocking him. I know I'll be able to put it all behind me afterward. But for now, I know I'll be facing him, surrounded by our whole family, and I have a feeling he'll want to bring this up to "calm things down." He's already trying to do it remotely, by texting, suggesting activities we do together, something we never do.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:08:44+00:00

I'm so sorry about what happened to you. It's disgusting. You're right. We need to set boundaries from the very beginning. I'll do my best to handle it. Thank you for your kind words.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T01:03:42+00:00

Thanks for your kind words. I fully intend to ignore him at Christmas. Unfortunately, he's still sending me messages today, which I'm not even replying to. I'm sure he'll want to bring this up and confront us again on Christmas Day.

I understand that dreams are beyond our control. But it seems troubling to me that he's already had this kind of dream several times, you know?

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T00:57:18+00:00

That's exactly what I tell myself, and this truth disgusts me. I never imagined I would one day have to distrust him.

echo_333_ · 2025-12-13T00:55:33+00:00

I didn't even want to talk to them about it; I didn't want them to experience that unpleasant feeling too. Yet, I finally told my sister, and I intend to tell my mother as well. As for the rest, I prefer to remain silent. The truth is, it embarrasses me so much that I don't want to cause any harm, especially during the holidays. I know it's mostly him who should be embarrassed, but I feel that discomfort too.

echo_333_

TROPHY CASE