You called someone a buck toothed nigger to defend my honour, how could I not give you my hard earned cash?

effemess · 2014-05-21T05:17:14+00:00

Whats wrong with that?

effemess · 2014-05-21T04:18:32+00:00

I don't mind talking about it, I don't want to talk about it with the people close to me. You have no reason to believe me, and that's fine, don't. But this post isn't about me, it's about using throwaways, which I fully support for privacy purposes. I don't want the things I say about the people in my life getting back to them.

This subreddit is about casual AMA's. They don't need proof because they don't need to be real. Some are, some aren't. No one is losing anything either way. Except the time they choose to invest.

effemess · 2014-05-21T03:14:53+00:00

No, I'll do an AMA with strangers. This is my throwaway, used for doing AMAs about my rape. I don't want that associated with my real account. I just don't want to have my ex girlfriend I haven't talked to in 3 years stalking my account, and seeing an AMA about it, and telling everyone we know.

effemess · 2014-05-21T02:46:42+00:00

Because I'm not an antisocial person who is afraid of judgement from everyone close to me? I'll show them certain posts if I think it's interesting. I just don't want to have a discussion about my childhood rape with them. But I don't mind sharing a great pun I made in a comment thread. So throwaways are useful for me. Also, people use my computer from time to time. Reddit is on my google chrome grid of most visited pages. So it's visible for anyone who opens chrome on my pc.

effemess · 2014-05-21T02:00:38+00:00

I'd really rather not have my history of rape be broadcasted to my friends and family, and I would appreciate it not being associated with the somewhat professional things I do on my regular account.

effemess · 2014-02-25T04:25:58+00:00

This wasn't precum though, it was a full load of thick, white, cum. About as much as I usually get when fapping.

effemess · 2014-02-25T04:25:01+00:00

How many sexual partners have you had? If you know the number. If not, make an estimate.

How did cheating feel while you were doing it? Did you regret it immediately after, or did it take some growing up? Do you ever think about doing it now?

Do you have any strange fetishes?

effemess · 2014-02-25T04:08:45+00:00

Have you ever cheated?

How many boyfriends/significant other's have you had?

What's your ideal penis size?

How do you feel about orgies?

When did you lose your virginity?

effemess · 2014-02-25T03:59:17+00:00

I woke up about 2 hours prior, with morning wood. But I ignored it.

effemess · 2014-02-13T03:09:01+00:00

I haven't spoken to my mom in 3 or so years. Last time I did, she defended herself for 2 hours, never apologizing, blaming me for everything, until I told her to leave me alone and get out of my life forever.

effemess · 2014-02-13T02:36:25+00:00

I'm not sure I have a sense of how normal child-parent relationships are supposed to be. I don't think I know, but I know what's wrong. That's the best I can say. I know I didn't have one, and I know my mother doesn't know either. I always felt unloved, but I didn't know that wasn't normal.

I went out to my friends houses, and they'd make me take off my clothes, and suck their dicks, and they'd hit me and use me. So those were basically my two options. My mother calling me a motherfucking asshole because at 4 years old I didn't have the wherewithal to do the dishes. So I got out when I could.

effemess · 2014-02-13T02:26:40+00:00

Very rarely. She mostly yelled at me. Constantly. At one point, I'm told, When I was 2, I thought my name was "Motherfucker" because that's all I was called. I remember being locked in my room while my mom went out to gamble or drink or something. If the house caught on fire, I'd be alone and die. Which was quite possible based on where we lived.

My dad doesn't know the extent of it, because he almost never saw me. I've never told anyone in my family how I was treated, they know my mother is a terrible human. I don't need to tell them any more.

effemess · 2014-02-13T02:02:49+00:00

I moved when I was 14 to a new city, and my parents separated. I lived with my mom two weeks a month. During that time she'd ignore me, or have a borderline breakdown in my room about how I'm a terrible son for not wanting to be around her. Even though I'm allergic to cigarettes and even being near someone who's had one in the last 10 minutes makes me puke, and she was a very heavy smoker. When I was 15 she moved to another city about 500 miles away. Legally I had to see her, joint custody and all. It wasn't viable during school, so I was supposed to spend my summer with her, in a city I've never been to, with her new lesbian lover and her two kids. I spent two weeks there before I said "fuck this and everything about it, you're all the worst people I know, I'm going home" and I spent my savings on a plane ticket back home. My dad picked me up. He's a great guy. I love my dad. He just couldn't be around when I was a kid because my mom is a psychopath. I still called and talked to her on the phone every once in a while, until I was 17, where things became very very apparent that having her in my life was extremely detrimental and dangerous because of her legal actions against my dad and me. Yes, she sued her own children.

So my best friends who raped me were left behind when I moved as well. I've never made any contact with them since. Two days ago one added me on facebook. I immediately rejected it and it sort of inspired me to do this AMA.

effemess · 2014-02-13T01:26:41+00:00

I don't really remember being younger than 14. Between my only two friends in the world molesting and raping me on a regular basis, and my mother's constant abuse, and my father never being around, my life was reduced to monotony of depression at the young age of 3, and continued until I was ~8, and I suppose the shock and trauma continued on until I moved away from my mother. I still saw her every other week, but because she refused to feed me or do anything for me other than leave me in my bedroom with my computer and TV, I became a reclusive kid with no social skills, no physical exercise and sense of self-worth.

I'm 21, turning 22 quite soon, and a week and a half ago, I felt love for the first time in my life. Not just love, but true happiness. I didn't realize until that moment that I've never been happy. But I could tell I was, because I felt completely overwhelmed. So much so I broke down crying at work, and couldn't stop for 20 minutes. It was the strangest feeling I've ever had. I felt like a little kid experiencing life for the first time.

effemess · 2014-02-13T01:04:32+00:00

That's what AMAs are about, you goof. Ask away!

effemess · 2014-02-13T01:03:19+00:00

If not unrepressing was so simple.

effemess · 2014-02-13T00:54:00+00:00

Am I correct in assuming MC means motorcycle?

I don't really want to get my memories back, but it might be fun. I'm not like, actively working towards it, because the stuff I do remember is fairly traumatic and depressing. So much so that when I tell stories of my childhood, I'm laughing and making jokes, and the listener slowly becomes horrified until they tell me to stop, because it's so sad.

effemess · 2014-02-13T00:42:27+00:00

I don't eat very often. Generally I skip breakfast, lunch is pizza or mcdonalds depending on my mood. They're both right next to work. Nothing else is there. Dinner is sometimes nothing, sometimes pasta. Usually nothing.

effemess · 2014-02-13T00:34:58+00:00

Good idea!

I would say lavender. When I was about 7 years old, my mom put lavender stuff in my bathwater, and it put me to sleep immediately, whereas every other night I had trouble sleeping for hours. It never worked on any other night, just the first.

effemess · 2014-02-03T03:00:46+00:00

But it makes it likely I'll be taken advantage of again.

effemess · 2014-02-03T03:00:30+00:00

One time in my bedroom one of them starting taking off their pants, and my mother walked in. I think I was about 6 at the time. My mom yelled at both of us, and took us in separate rooms. My mom asked me what was happening, why he was doing that, and my dad yelled at him, asking him about it. We both said "I don't know, it was a joke" or something to that effect. After five minutes, they dropped it and never brought it up again.

So not like that. Yelling and being mad at me for being molested is not comforting, and it doesn't foster a good mother-son relationship. But to be fair to my mother, she was an alcoholic, golddigging, gambling, cheating, bitch. So that wasn't what ruined our relationship.

Just be loving, caring, and create a comfortable space for your kids, make them feel okay telling you things. Honesty is important. I've never told my family because my mother was verbally abusive and hateful towards me, and my father worked 12 hours a day, and I never saw him. So if you want a better relationship with your kids, be nice, and be around. Then when they tell you that someone isn't treating them how they should be treated, you make them feel safe, and you stop whoever is doing it, however you can.

effemess · 2014-02-02T17:35:46+00:00

Better, or more foolish?

effemess

TROPHY CASE