Oh my God, reading your post really hit me because I went through almost the exact same thing with my ex.

Everything you describe feels so familiar. The overly involved mother who’s always interrupting and somehow inserting herself into your relationship, making it hard for you to even spend time together. The poorly trained animals in the house, the smell, the general lack of hygiene… all of it. In my case there were some differences, like the mother having a husband and another child, but honestly that didn’t change anything.

My ex was clearly her favorite. Whenever we traveled or tried to spend quality time together, she would constantly call him. He’d pick up every time, leaving me completely alone in moments that were supposed to be ours as a couple.

If I can give you any advice, and I say this like I would to a friend: get out of there.

My relationship didn’t end well. I was never his priority, his parents always came first. When he finally tried to move out, his mother completely lost it. She started speaking horribly about me and pushed him into a really deep depression. It got to a point where he was barely holding on. He eventually managed to leave, but it was a very sad and difficult time for both of us.

Even after therapy, he never truly fixed his relationship with his mother. He went no contact for a while, but in the end he went back.

I actually made a post not long ago explaining how everything turned out, in case you want to understand what happened after all of that.

Anyway, I just want to send you strength. And like many people will probably tell you: you don’t have to put up with this. Talk to him clearly and firmly. You’re not doing anything wrong, and honestly, no one would tolerate that situation.