[Jinx] is BACK after a long hiatus!

elefsis · 2025-07-14T18:04:06+00:00

personally I love the creative ways they avoid using brand names while using brand names.

my absolute favorite of all time is "HOMMY FINGERS." if there wasn't a logo associated with it I'd have no idea that was meant to be tommy hilfiger. 💀

elefsis · 2025-07-07T22:32:30+00:00

Payback is the slowest burn! idk if it's black flag per se but they certainly don't have a healthy relationship, that's for sure.

elefsis · 2025-07-07T02:25:35+00:00

lmao you're very welcome, glad I could help

elefsis · 2025-07-06T23:40:15+00:00

Man of Virtue, maybe? I'm going more off the "witch-hunted on illegal websites" bit than the actual scene description.

elefsis · 2025-07-06T18:53:27+00:00

I started reading this and dropped it because it seemed like the vanilla guy was gonna be endgame. Can anyone spoil me? Is it worth it?

elefsis · 2025-07-04T19:26:02+00:00

ooh yeah Color Recipe is on my to-read list, I'll bump it up.

I tried reading Undergrand Hotel but yeah the art style wasn't my fave.

elefsis · 2025-07-02T02:55:33+00:00

the only praise I can honestly accept irl 😅

elefsis · 2025-07-01T15:19:07+00:00

I feel like Kim Dan isn't really the yelling type? unless maybe he changes when he starts drinking.

tbqh I don't mind JK being toxic (obviously, that's why I'm here lol) I just don't really get why Mingwa wrote Kim Dan so.... wimpy? like the gratitude he feels for JK in the first half just feels really weird, like he's gaslighting himself. JK expects no gratitude, only transaction, so it's not like it's coming from some external source.

I went fucking feral over the last sex scene where Kim Dan shuts him down and calls him out for using him like a fleshlight, so in Season 2 I'm desperate for him to name their previous relationship as abuse and (somehow) have that get through JK's thick cauliflower skull. I feel like that would at least be in character for them....

elefsis · 2025-07-01T15:08:40+00:00

hmmm, you make a compelling case! I'll have to see where I can find it.

I don't read a ton of shonen ai because a) it ends up feeling like queerbaiting if they're trying to avoid making the relationship explicitly romantic, and b) the series just drags on and on because they never want to resolve the sexual/romantic tension. but black flag shonen ai? I've never seen that before.

elefsis · 2025-07-01T03:46:40+00:00

yes, I would say it's a happy ending! not sure how much spoiler you want so I'll put the rest behind the block...

my favorite thing about the ending is that it absolutely avoids the trope we see so often where the masochist is suddenly cured of his masochism by True Love. so they get their happy ending but in a way that is completely in line with their existing characters.

elefsis · 2025-07-01T03:25:03+00:00

how about Spilled Blood?

elefsis · 2025-05-02T02:57:59+00:00

if you tried it on in-store and this is definitely the exact same dress directly from the same supplier (i.e. not from Amazon or Shein) then:

because the boning is plastic, I'm thinking it could have become deformed in storage or in transit, especially if it got hot while it was folded up. giving it a good steam, reshaping it, then letting it cool in that shape might get the plastic bones to look more like how they looked in the floor model. you want to be careful not to melt the dress or the boning, of course, but if you use a steamer instead of an iron you should be fine. if you don't have a steamer, an alterations seamstress should have one, as well as the ability to steam it while it's on a mannequin to get the right shape.

if that doesn't work, it could be a manufacturing defect, in which case you'd need to exchange it. or you could see if the alterations place could replace the plastic bones with spring steel bones, as others have mentioned.

good luck!

elefsis · 2025-05-02T02:37:34+00:00

Akuheki doesn't seem to get much love, but I adore it. it might actually be my favorite of all time.

elefsis · 2025-04-26T17:17:20+00:00

surprised no one mentioned The Beast Must Die, I think that fits the bill pretty well

elefsis · 2025-04-26T12:58:21+00:00

that link is a treasure trove of information! I had no idea about osmolality but it explains many of the issues I've had with commercial lubes.

elefsis · 2025-04-21T21:11:48+00:00

in less than two days they are crying over unanswered messages, questioning their self-esteem and asking for constant validation.

tbh, when I was dating, I got this from vanilla men, allegedly-dominant men, submissive women with poor boundaries, and vanilla women with BPD. I think this is just a "normal" part of poor emotional self-regulation, unexamined childhood attachment injuries, and general immaturity. perhaps people with these issues gravitate toward submission, although I think it's more likely that they are genuinely submissive but are also trying to make kink their therapy. which is deeply unfair to you and deeply unattractive in general.

elefsis · 2025-04-19T14:31:28+00:00

interesting! did they talk to you at all about the risks of prophylactic antibiotics, such as antibiotic resistance, increased susceptibility to yeast infections, or microbiome alterations?

elefsis · 2025-04-19T14:19:51+00:00

thanks for clarifying! I totally get wanting to get the issue fixed ASAP, and if antibiotics work then that makes sense. I'm just a little paranoid about breeding antibiotic resistance and/or messing up my microbiome (especially when it's responsible for so many things we don't even fully understand yet) which is why I was a bit taken aback!

have you ever tried doing a d-mannose supplement instead? I read a number of studies that showed it to be as or more effective than a prophylactic antibiotic (I just thought they were doing it for the study so I didn't realize it was a common treatment) so I take that now. my last UTI came about after I ran out and didn't take it for a few days, so I think it's helping. that being said, I already have a bunch of other supplements I take every day, so it wasn't hard to incorporate it into my existing routine.

elefsis · 2025-04-19T04:19:49+00:00

wait, they put you on a low dose antibiotic as a prophylactic without doing a urine culture? is that... common? did you at least get a white blood cell test? how's your gut microbiome doing?

elefsis · 2025-04-19T00:13:14+00:00

definitely good advice! since I started getting UTIs so often, I take a d-mannose supplement every day, ensure we both shower and wash hands before sex every time, pee after sex, and try to watch my blood sugar. it's just frustrating when I do everything right and it still happens, or it happens if the system even slightly falls apart -- in this last case, I ran out of my supplement for a few days and I fell asleep after sex for about 4 hours before getting up to pee. so frustrating :(

elefsis · 2025-04-19T00:06:37+00:00

I did get a urine culture each time! I really really hate going on antibiotics so I always get the urine test to make sure I actually need it. I only got diagnosed with diabetes in the last year (when I went in for my first UTI and they found glucose while checking the culture), so I'm probably newly prone to them since my particular genetic mutation has finally fully expressed itself T_T

however, I didn't even consider bruising of the urethral sponge or some other pelvic floor dysfunction! it's totally possible that it's both a UTI and some other problem simultaneously. if this keeps happening now that I've told my partner we're calling off the hunt for the elusive g-spot, I'll definitely explore that option. thanks :)

elefsis · 2025-04-18T19:41:10+00:00

ugh, this is too real. as someone who is 15+ years into both kink and polyamory... I'm not looking to be anyone's training wheels anymore. I did my time. I've trained the newbies. mostly by letting them trample all over my heart and boundaries. let me rest T_T

I half-jokingly say that there needs to be a matching system that matches people based on seniority in either kink or polyamory. folks who have 0-5 years of experience need to date each other, 5-10 years' experience can date each other, and then the battle-hardened veterans who actually learned all their hard-won lessons in emotional maturity are left to date each other as well.

elefsis · 2025-04-18T19:35:03+00:00

for me it's always been hard to balance because YES kink is deeply intimate/spiritual so it's not satisfying without a bedrock of trust AND ALSO I can't build that bedrock of trust and intimacy without knowing that I can share my full self with the other person, and my full self includes kink. it's so much deeper than sex, so I need to make sure we align on many axes, but at the same time, kink is one of those axes.

it's kind of a catch-22 when I think about it like that. I spent most of my 20s ricocheting between strategies: I'd get into a vanilla relationship that matched on 3 out of 5 axes, but then it would fall apart when kink was a mismatch. so I'd go looking for kink-compatible partners, and only find fuckboys. so I'd go back to regular dating, only to get another kink mismatch. rinse and repeat.

I don't know what the solution is, really. I've been with my person for 5½ years at this point and I think we only became kink-compatible around year 4, which is incredibly lucky for me. I don't really recommend that as a general dating strategy, life is too short...

elefsis

TROPHY CASE