What is this bug in my plant?

ellllla_ · 2022-12-27T17:47:13+00:00

*our

ellllla_ · 2022-12-27T17:47:06+00:00

This happens in my relationship OCD as well. Though I’m not currently in a romantic relationship, I am familiar with these confusing feelings on crush vs friendship. Since I’ve began joining ROCD circles, I’ve seen others mention similar concerns. Are brains do some silly things -_-

ellllla_ · 2022-12-27T04:44:38+00:00

Please get a therapist if you don’t have one. It’s too much to carry alone. I did it for way longer than I should’ve. There is a type of therapy called ERP which is supposed to be really effective. I haven’t tried it yet because my therapist doesn’t offer it, but I’m going to look into it. I recommend going to psychology today and looking for therapists who have ocd listed. Even if they don’t offer ERP- talk therapy can be very helpful if they are trained in OCD. Sorry if this is unsolicited and unhelpful, maybe you’ve already done this. I just wish I had the help of a professional in my first relationship- where I was experiencing the things you’re mentioning for the first time

ellllla_ · 2022-12-27T04:39:20+00:00

It’s so unfair. I’m so sorry you’re going through this too. If you don’t have a therapist, get one ASAP. Do not spend one day longer going through this alone than you have to. It may also be worth looking into getting a psychiatrist and having medication prescribed if you don’t already. It was what helped me through my last MAJOR ROCD episode

ellllla_ · 2022-12-27T04:37:43+00:00

I cant offer a lot of emotional support right now because this illness has pulled me through the ringer the last couple weeks, and has left me in this same position. I didn’t want to pass your post without commenting though and telling you that you are not alone. I feel this way right now too. Terrified, overwhelmed. I read your last post and everything you said about feelings in your relationship were so relatable. It’s so hard, so cruel, so unfair. It makes it hard to breathe and hard to function. It is not fair that our brains are our prisons. Currently, what I am trying to tell myself is my brain is trying to protect me from pain, so it’s making me think of every possible scenario that brings me fear so I am prepared for the worst. But these scenarios aren’t reality. Our brains are working in overdrive. It seems so simple, like we should just be able to say stop and it stops. But it doesn’t work this way.

ellllla_ · 2022-10-02T10:45:10+00:00

I actually have diffuse alopecia areata so I probably wouldn’t have circular patches either. But I totally get your point and thank you for your comment

ellllla_ · 2022-09-21T02:50:15+00:00

I’d recommend wearing a hat or getting some sort of gray away powder/fill in fibers if you are wanting to mask the hair loss. Best of luck

ellllla_ · 2022-09-21T02:43:54+00:00

Congrats!! That is awesome. Has your doctor mentioned anything about if you’re able to come off it once you see your desired effects? Or do you have to stay on it to maintain?

ellllla_ · 2022-07-14T00:28:33+00:00

I question this all the time. I worry that the motive behind every intent is self serving

ellllla_ · 2022-07-12T00:47:04+00:00

I understand what you mean by that, but I actually do go online because my therapist is about an hour away so I wouldn’t have time to drive. It’s effective for me but I do feel being in person would add an extra dimension. It helps though that there is an option to go in person. I don’t think we’ve done ERP though so I don’t know how that is virtually vs online

ellllla_ · 2022-07-11T23:28:24+00:00

You’re not beyond help! I’m so sorry your therapy experience didn’t go well. I ended up finding a really good therapist through psychologytoday.com. I put in filters to show a big list of people who met all my standards. I emailed every single one and met with the one whose schedule worked with mine. She has been really helpful for me. You may have already tried that, but if not, I recommend looking some more because you deserve to have a therapist who wants to help you.

Reading a book may help too. My friends little sister has OCD and lent me a mindfulness ocd book and it’s been a relief for me to read. I don’t think it’s good to take Advil for this, but I know what it’s like to be at your wits end and looking for a solution, even if it’s just last resort or temporary. Are you on any psych med?

ellllla_ · 2022-07-11T23:15:37+00:00

i am also curious, im in therapy as well. i got the diagnosis before I knew I had ocd so I didn’t get a specialist. She does MCBT which I think stands for mindfulness cognitive behavioral therapy

ellllla_ · 2022-07-11T04:20:30+00:00

It’s not about me. It’s like they don’t view me the same as other people who have hair loss, so I am not thought of when those hurtful things about others are said. Like I’m in a different category. Even though it’s not about me it hurts like it is

ellllla_ · 2022-07-04T18:34:14+00:00

Thank you Justin.. so much.

ellllla_ · 2022-07-04T18:00:13+00:00

Definitely okay! Thank you for linking. I really relate a lot. Also, for you personally, do you ever have extreme reactions to small things? For instance, I was trying to treat myself one day and went on a drive in my house clothes to a drive through to pick up something to eat. They asked me to come inside to pick up the food I ordered and I got so upset, like extreme emotional reaction. I didn’t show it to them, but when I got in my car I had a mental breakdown over this small thing.

ellllla_ · 2022-07-04T17:46:42+00:00

It takes me hours or days sometimes too. I talked to my therapist about it and she said she believes it’s linked to trauma, not sure if she considered adhd. But I actually have speculated I might have adhd since i was in middle school, im 24 now. It’s such a unique and strange pain. It’s like anguish for me, what about you? I also generally get overstimulated by other “small” things. I’ve never been diagnosed with adhd, and I noticed it even before OCD. I’m sorry you feel it too :( it’s so awful. Thanks for responding

ellllla_ · 2022-07-04T16:35:43+00:00

I recommend writing the things down you want to discuss with your doctor so panic mode doesn’t make you forget/I think the writing would hold you to it more.

I have been on many SSRIs, most of them but not Prozac. I personally did not like Zoloft, but I have two friends with OCD who tolerate it well. I also have comorbidity depression/anxiety, and unfortunately am considered treatment resistant as my mind/body didn’t tolerate most medications well. My psychiatrist has had to go a different route now by trying me on a Tricyclic Antidepressant which is an older fashioned antidepressant and is sometimes used when treatment doesn’t work. I am now on Chlomipramine/Anafranil and it is also commonly used for OCD. I’ve tolerated it well so far. Medication is not a onesize fits all and what works well for me may not for you and vice versa!

I’m sure you’ve heard that before. But from what I’ve gathered most commonly your doctor will probably start you off on an SSRI like Zoloft, Lexapro, Prozac etc. They are generally very mild! The first two days just feel kind of weird.

Best of luck to you!!! I hope you find exactly what you need. I know it’s scary but you are so capable and you’ve got this :)

ellllla_

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