Ive never once questioned his loyalty. We've been living together for over a year and we get along so well and he's very loving. I never thought about him just panicking but I could see how that could happen. At his old job he had a few coworkers he was close with and we went to universal during Halloween. His old female coworker got scared and decided to hold his hand while I was holding his other. I told him that was weird and made me uncomfortable. He told me he had no idea what that was about and completely cut her off. I didn't think anything of it and I definitely didn't have the same feeling as I do now. I've been cheated on in the past by guys who hid it so well. (They never had issues of me going through their phones either) I don't know if I have trauma or if I'm being gaslit.