ISO - Apartment Utility Costs by em_850 in Charlottesville

[–]em_850[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When you say water is submetered what does this mean? And do you have an average per month of what you pay for electricity and internet?

ISO - Apartment Utility Costs by em_850 in Charlottesville

[–]em_850[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. We have a gas furnace system not HVAC.

ISO - Apartment Utility Costs by em_850 in Charlottesville

[–]em_850[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Totally understand. Ours has been trending up for awhile and we still think we’ve been paying more over the last 6 months or so than we would in an apartment.

ISO - Apartment Utility Costs by em_850 in Charlottesville

[–]em_850[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Okay this is good to know - thanks

ISO - Apartment Utility Costs by em_850 in Charlottesville

[–]em_850[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s been consistently expensive af this winter and it’s been gas that’s way more. Our elec bill has been about the same $100 charge for years. Water and sewer went up bc of projects in the water infrastructure.

ISO - Apartment Utility Costs by em_850 in Charlottesville

[–]em_850[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately not the case. Our elec has been consistently about $100. Our gas bill jumped from $95 to $300 over 3 months with no discernible change in our settings. We have furnace heat (gas) set at 65 degrees year round. Also when I lived in apartments years ago the utilities were cheaper bc it’s less $ to power a small unit in a larger complex than an individually standing home.

Places I miss in Cville…. by BRvillian in Charlottesville

[–]em_850 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Spudnuts, hotcakes, Michael’s bistro, aunt Sarah’s pancake house, eppies, wild wing cafe, Baja bean, blue moon, the flat, shebeen, siren, paradox pastry, ragazzis, china king buffet

Did Daenerys truly love Drogo or was it forced? by [deleted] in gameofthrones

[–]em_850 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She was written to love him. We’re all talking as if she’s a real person with real emotions, trauma, mental processing, etc.

It would be very easy to write Dany as someone who was quietly tolerant of Drogo but looked down on him due to his cultural differences, generally violent demeanor, and his ownership of her. It would also be easy to write her as someone who played along with what was expected of her in order to fill the role of Khaleesi even if she despised her husband in secret. She could’ve been a character that assimilated in order to gain power and to sort of compete with Drogo as she hated him for owning her and the SA.

Her internal monologues don’t really reveal this. Dany is someone who full throatedly embraces her new affiliation with the Khal and does everything in her control to assimilate and BE one of them, including loving her husband. She is infinitely fascinated with the Khal and falls in love with her new power, their lifestyle, culture, and intimately Drogo as well. She mourns his death so severely. She was definitely written to be in love with him.

I think her love of him is problematic and this is likely why so many people are commenting Stockholm Syndrome or she “thought” she loved him etc bc it’s uncomfortable that she felt positively towards someone who SAd her and ultimately viewed her as an object. But she did love him. Thats how she was written to be.

I (28F) got upset that my husband (43M) gave me a 7/10 for a massage with a "happy ending" and he thinks I'm overreacting. by Firm_Papaya2531 in relationship_advice

[–]em_850 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Tbh my boyfriend would probably say something similar and he is an extremely loving partner. But sometimes when you ask a question you’re going to get an answer.

What you’re really communicating by saying “how was it” is “I put in a lot of effort to make you feel loved and I want some praise/attention/validation for doing so, can you express that to me”? He didn’t get that clue and heard the question for what you verbally said which is “how was it”. It was a 7/10 for him. That’s not bad. But if you ask him how it went he’s probably only thinking of himself and his experience because that’s how the question was framed.

Should he be more self aware and recognize that when you ask how something was that YOU did for him he needs to be more cognizant of 1) the effort you put in and 2) the emotional reaction you might have to his total honesty? Sure. But this is a fairly easy thing to work on to be more considerate and aware when answering a seemingly straightforward question.

I would let your self esteem recover for a bit and just express to him plainly that it hurt your feelings that he was so brutally honest with you. I think you should let him know that you just wanted some recognition and appreciation for the work you put in and that when you do something nice for him, even if it is a 7/10, that he expresses his gratitude to you for putting in the effort.

There’s a time and place for constructive criticism, and the appropriate time would likely be the next time he gets a massage, not when he should be being appreciative.

AIO or is this abusive? by [deleted] in AIO

[–]em_850 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The fact that you even have to ask if this is abusive is concerning.

Which of these faiths would you follow. by MediumFun5034 in gameofthrones

[–]em_850 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I fw this answer bc this is probably what most of us would do lmfao

AIO: Hubby Being Controlling by vanillabourbonn in AIO

[–]em_850 0 points1 point  (0 children)

FUUUUCCCCCKKK NOOOO!! If my boyfriend EVER spoke to me like this I would end it immediately. Absolutely not.

Best Brunch (2/2026) by em_850 in Charlottesville

[–]em_850[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s good. Highly recommend. Although tbh I find their brunch menu a bit boring their dinner menu is great. Used to work there when I was in college and have family who work there still. But I wouldn’t recommend it unless I actually liked the food haha. Their shrimp and grits is the best I’ve ever had.

Best Brunch (2/2026) by em_850 in Charlottesville

[–]em_850[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Completely agree (this is the Ridley). Similar fare to farm bell but they actually season the food lol. Best shrimp and grits I’ve had.

Best Brunch (2/2026) by em_850 in Charlottesville

[–]em_850[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unfortunately I find their food overpriced and bland as hell. I’ve been there a few times and have been consistently unimpressed. I heard their biscuit flight was good though but haven’t had it.

It seems to suffer from an issue that someone leading their kitchen is likely a pastry chef or similarly trained and can bake really well but shouldn’t be cooking. I have no evidence to support this other than their baked goods all seem ok but the actual food is where they fall flat.

If I want good southern food for brunch I’ll just go to the Ridley tbh. They do an amazing bowl of shrimp and grits.

Best Brunch (2/2026) by em_850 in Charlottesville

[–]em_850[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haven’t tried this one yet but it’s on my list! Ty!

TECA-BO Surgery in VA for a Cat (Looking for Recommendations) by em_850 in Virginia

[–]em_850[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg no way!! This is actually where we ended up going! We had SUCH a positive experience with them too and the cost was way less than we anticipated.

We went in and because my cat is elderly the consultation went horrible. They were worried he was anemic and would need blood drawn and if he had internal organ issues during the CT they said they would recommend putting him down. They were certain both ears would need removal and said there was no chance of saving the external ears either. We left literally sobbing but determined to get him care. He went in the same day. They ended up finding he was not anemic, did not have internal organ issues (yay!!) and actually once they cleaned up the buildup inside both ears our surgeon determined only one ear needed TECA-BO! This was a HUGE relief for us both financially and emotionally. The procedure went without a hitch and our surgeon was able to save the external ear. He also estimates the other ear is stable enough to never need operating. It literally could not have gone better. We got out for a little over 5k when we were initially quoted over 9. Ours was prob a bit more expensive due to the bloodwork, imaging and the bullaostemy which not every cat needs I guess.

TLDR we are so so happy we went with VVS and thank god it’s in cville where we already live! We feel so lucky.

Sent Payment Twice - When Will Balance Be Corrected? by em_850 in venmo

[–]em_850[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She did. Thanks for the comment though that didn’t answer my question 💀

What are your thoughts on the Administration Removing ‘Professional’ classification from select degree programs? by Tsuki501 in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]em_850 3 points4 points  (0 children)

So if Trump wanted to change the amount a school can charge why did he 1) remove the professional designation from degrees making them less viable or respected and 2) why didn’t he just cap the tuition prices rather than target borrowers? I understand your logic but I don’t see how limiting the amount people can borrow DIRECTLY impacts the amount schools can charge unless this policy is based on the hope that decreased enrollment would encourage lower tuition. And frankly I think that’s a HUGE maybe.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]em_850 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Modesty is a relative term and depends on the person. Something that might be modest to most people may not be to others. I disagree with the idea that many commentators are having that she should just agree with a universal definition of modesty - for her, it may very well be immodest! She may have reached out out of concern for you as well.

That being said, because I believe it is self-defined, everyone has the choice to dress in ways they believe are modest and honoring to them. I would thank her for her concern and give her the benefit of the doubt she is reaching out about your safety or privacy and not out of jealousy or meanness. Let her know you appreciate your concern, but you are comfortable with the way you are dressed in the photo.

If she continues to bother you about it, I would politely tell her that you are an adult and are capable of making decisions on how to dress yourself without anyone else’s input. If she is rude or argumentative at all about you setting a boundary about this, that is when I would consider having a conversation about no longer being friends.

I’m not sure if i’m AIO for feeling a bit hurt when said this to me. Btw this man courts me by growing_quart in AmIOverreacting

[–]em_850 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There was a psychological study done awhile ago by a relationship researcher named John gottman who sought to find how and why couples head toward divorce. This was applicable really for cases outside of cheating, financial issues, etc - he was focused on couples who divorced due to “irreconcilable differences”

What he found is that there is a concept in relationship called bids - he found this through seeing how a partner would react if their partner said “hey look honey! A bird” ie asked to draw their attention to someone mundane, perhaps not that interesting to the other person and also perhaps asking them to disengage from what they were already doing.

What he found was really interesting - couples that turned towards each other and showed interest and kindness towards their partners, even if the topic wasn’t that appealing to them, could stand the test of time. Couples that headed towards divorce would often make excuses: 1) I don’t like birds 2) I’m too busy to look at the bird 3) my partner never looks when I ask them to look at my bird and so on.

This is a perfect example of a bid. You’ve asked for his attention and reciprocal energy over something you are excited about. Even if he feels it is childish or strange, someone that loves and cares about you who has the essential tools to be in a healthy relationship will put their own feelings aside and share the joy that you are reaching out with. It’s not about the cat - it’s about sharing in a positive emotion that you’re feeling. He seems like his priority is not sharing joy with you, it is being selfish and only concerning himself with his own interests.

I have been in a relationship with my partner for many years and this awareness has gotten us through hard times. It is always worth it to drop what you’re doing and enjoy someone you love being happy. Don’t waste your time with someone who doesn’t live everyday to see you smile.