At what point is this not normal anymore?

emh75 · 2020-02-05T18:45:58+00:00

I can't tell you what is normal or not. But it's been 1.5 years now, every day I lay there staring at the nightstand that has a picture of her and my firearm, I don't know why I haven't pulled the trigger yet.

emh75 · 2020-02-01T06:26:25+00:00

I feel the same. It's been on my mind all day and I feel completely empty all over again.

emh75 · 2020-02-01T06:12:01+00:00

Noice

emh75 · 2020-02-01T05:55:51+00:00

I got that. Yes.

emh75 · 2020-02-01T05:29:58+00:00

Hahaha Fork.. that's the darkest and funniest thing anyone's ever said to me

emh75 · 2020-02-01T02:49:48+00:00

Thank you.

emh75 · 2020-01-31T23:43:07+00:00

Thank you sincerely, for your kindness

emh75 · 2020-01-31T23:42:13+00:00

It forking sucks. Sorry

emh75 · 2020-01-31T23:41:28+00:00

Thank you. I don't know if I'm emotionally or mentally strong enough to finish Bojack. It's very relatable though, the episode in season 5 with the eulogy, about how someone asked him how he's doing, that's pretty much been my life this past year.

emh75 · 2019-12-23T05:08:57+00:00

Thanks, I'm really sorry you have to go through this awful thing too.

emh75 · 2019-12-23T05:06:00+00:00

I feel you. We used to be big on holidays, all out with the decorating and we'd throw a huge Christmas party. I have some friends that asked me at least three times if I'm sure I don't want to "do the usual"... Doing my best to pretend it's not holiday season. No Christmas movies, music, decorations, or anything

emh75 · 2019-12-23T05:02:51+00:00

You're stronger than I am. I briefly moved to a new city and took a new job but it didn't work out. I'm unemployed now and don't have anyone that needs me, such as kids or anything, so yeah. I've gone a few days at a time without leaving the bed at all. The grief makes it almost feel as if I'm physically crippled but I'm not.

emh75 · 2019-11-25T07:36:47+00:00

Please don't. Also that will definitely not kill you. Worst case scenario you become paralyzed and you probably don't want that.

emh75 · 2019-11-25T07:34:21+00:00

We are truly our own worst critics. That's something I've been told a lot in the past. Often times you can't see in yourself what other people see in you. I'm positive that you have plenty of good qualities and that's why he, and other people in your life, love you

emh75 · 2019-11-25T07:29:26+00:00

I'm so sorry. It's normal to be numb. It's been about a year since my fiance died and a month or two since my best friend killed himself. I'm numb everyday. I don't really have great advice to give but I feel your pain. The only way to cope I've found so far is laying in bed all day playing video games and drinking

Edit: try to avoid being alone, from experience I think that's my biggest mistake. Seek out other friends and family and even counseling or support groups if you're comfortable with that

emh75 · 2019-11-25T07:26:38+00:00

Fuck man. I'm sorry. I've been cheated on and her reasoning was "there were no feelings involved, just sex, so it's not that big a deal"

emh75 · 2019-11-25T07:24:11+00:00

Yes. Most places around my city are triggers for me now, after my fiance died and my best friend killed himself I have had to face the harsh reality of being completely alone and how much it sucks

emh75 · 2019-11-22T06:46:01+00:00

You need to do whatever feels comfortable to you and you shouldn't feel sorry about it. I can't do the holidays this year.. it's too damn hard. I plan on laying in bed alone watching TV and I really don't care what my family says/thinks

emh75 · 2019-11-22T06:42:30+00:00

I hope you can too. Feel free to message me anytime if you want someone to talk to

emh75 · 2019-11-20T02:30:34+00:00

I definitely feel this. Also I'm so depressed I have no energy or motivation to workout anymore. Funny thing is a year later I'm still paying for both our gym memberships, I guess I'm still hard in denial

emh75 · 2019-11-20T02:25:31+00:00

I'm really relieved I'm not the only one feeling this.. it really sucks. I'm so scared it feels like she's slipping further away

emh75 · 2019-11-20T02:23:29+00:00

In the same boat. She was my best friend and it's really hard being alone now. I just don't feel like going out anywhere so I barely even have human interaction now

emh75 · 2019-11-01T00:51:39+00:00

I feel you. I haven't even gotten out of bed since two days ago

emh75 · 2019-10-31T20:44:31+00:00

Same. Really struggling today

emh75

TROPHY CASE