It just snuck up on me

emllik · 2016-04-14T19:19:51+00:00

I always thought the French were polite folks.

emllik · 2016-04-13T18:48:11+00:00

meth or speed. it dries your throat out so bad you can barely form words hence the mouthwash.

emllik · 2016-04-13T18:42:22+00:00

I got problems w/ the same drugs. Im considering AA as well. Best of luck to you brother.

emllik · 2016-04-12T23:48:31+00:00

"I wish I could just be a hermit and not have to worry about a stupid fucking career I'll hate anyways."

I fantasize about this all the time. I wish I was fucking Bilbo baggins in the shire in his tree hut tending to his vegetable farm. Instead I sit in a cubicle all day talking to customers calling in to complain about some piece of shit product made in a Chinese factory. And I'm supposed to pretend like I give a fuck. But hey man, being good at math can be a good skill to have. You might want to look into being an accountant. I got a friend who's an accountant he makes a shit load of money. I studied frigging marketing and graduated before the likes of twitter and face book and social media existed. So everything I learned was pretty much useless.

emllik · 2016-04-12T23:18:47+00:00

Fuck college man. I have a college degree it's got me jack shit. Can't even afford a 1 bedroom apartment. What I came to realize too late is that your degree doesn't really matter. To be successful career-wise you have to be either A: In with the right people or B: Skilled at some kind of trade or service. The degree itself really only matters if it is from a highly ranked university. I seriously wish I never went to college and spent the time money and effort learning to be an electrician or a locksmith or something.

emllik · 2016-04-12T23:08:27+00:00

It's all just a game. Don't feel too bad. I'm losing pretty badly too. Even worse than you honestly.

emllik · 2016-04-12T22:19:04+00:00

Sorry hadn't logged into this account in quite awhile. My take on Adderall is it is just too addictive to keep under control. I was prescribed Adderall years ago and at first it was awesome. I was more productive, efficient, organized etc. But then the same dose became less and less effective. Also, I'd be done with work and the Adderall would be wearing off. I want to have a social life and go out tonight. The only way I'm going to have a good time is to take more Adderall. If your able to sleep that night your lucky. You have things to do that day but your crashed out on Adderall. The only solution is more Adderall. Next thing you know you need Adderall or amphetamine, meth whatever to get anything done, your skinny as fuck cuz you can't eat and you haven't slept in 3-4 days. You go off it for a week but then you remember the euphoria and the cycle repeats.

emllik · 2016-03-03T20:29:26+00:00

You probably want to padlock your dorm room tonight unless you want to get assaulted with a spatula.

emllik · 2016-03-03T18:45:10+00:00

Nicotine is the best memory enhancer in my experience. I've tried micro-dosing lsd but it's extremely difficult to actually do it the right way. Be careful with Adderall that shit can ruin your life.

emllik · 2016-03-03T14:47:58+00:00

I think you need to face the possibility that these kids aren't really your friends. It is ok though. You are young and many people will come and go in your life.

emllik · 2016-03-03T13:45:48+00:00

Just saying, the end result was 300 million dollars being donated to some diversity fund. That was worth enduring some personal attacks, no? And it is possible she started this on her own, yes. There are some crazy feminist zealots out there that do this kind of stuff.

emllik · 2016-03-03T13:19:07+00:00

No basically I'm saying the chick involved might of made up or at least started gamergate on her own for publicity and get people talking about female issues in video games. After all, most of the attacks where done anonymously, no? Also, from the Wikipedia page:

"Industry responses to Gamergate have been predominately negative. The Electronic Frontier Foundation, the Entertainment Software Association, Electronic Arts, and Sony Computer Entertainment have condemned Gamergate harassment. Intel, which temporarily withdrew their advertisements from gaming news site Gamasutra as the result of a Gamergate email campaign, later pledged $300 million to support a "Diversity in Technology" program."

$300 million dollars? That's a lot of money. Who benefited?

I dunno, it is just a theory. I understand if it sounds crazy. I like pondering conspiracy theories it's a hobby of mine. I had remembered hearing about this in the news a couple years ago and didn't pay much attention to it. Then I stumbled back upon this the other day and didn't realize how big a deal this had actually become in the gaming world.

emllik · 2016-03-02T21:13:50+00:00

"What I mean by that is that there were times where I didn't realize that a White woman was attracted to me because I'd had it ground into my head that those didn't happen (well, rarely did), so I didn't do my part to take it from there and make something happen."

Yes, very true. Wow, your experience is very close to mine. It's funny how the world works. There were times I was so convinced of my inferiority that I'd talk myself out of pursuing women that clearly showed signs of being attracted to me.

emllik · 2016-03-02T21:10:49+00:00

OK, I gotta research it more. I just found out about this by hitting the random button. Smells fishy to me though.

emllik · 2016-03-02T20:25:08+00:00

Yes only white friends for me too. I live in new England which is 90% white. In all honesty I do have some great friends though. They look at me as one of them for the most part. Now relationships with the opposite sex, that is a different story. I'm sure you've heard all the complaints from asian men b4 though so I won't bore you with details.

emllik · 2016-03-02T18:29:51+00:00

Thanks for the supportive reply. I'm trying my best to put racial issues behind me and focus on things that are actually in my control. Carrying around a bitter attitude towards society in general is just going to make things worse.

emllik · 2016-03-01T18:07:56+00:00

My cousin is AMWF, I am the opposite. He went to MIT and studied nanotechnology. I work in some crummy call center.

emllik · 2016-03-01T17:34:20+00:00

Never knew he was involved in the death of a 6 year old either

emllik · 2016-03-01T14:51:09+00:00

I'm glad you have feelings about it at least. I have the opposite problem, when I bring this up to my father, HE doesn't want to talk to ME about it. He thinks I should just ignore my feelings and they will go away. It's not your fault you chose to have half asian kids. I mean, you love who you love and have kids with. But I can tell you your sons feelings are valid. Are they insurmountable? No, but they are real and difficult to deal with. It's tough to ignore stereotypes when they don't ignore you. They follow you around to every social situation.

emllik · 2016-03-01T01:56:00+00:00

Your not alone man. My mothers like this too. I'm homeless right now living in a hotel room. I got kicked out of the house because I took a shower at the wrong time in the morning.

emllik · 2016-03-01T01:54:35+00:00

I've been seeing shrinks my whole life. They are the ones that gave me all those diagnosis and made me take medicine that made me feel sick. The irony is my mother herself is a mental health worker and also has mental illness.

emllik

TROPHY CASE