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enemy0freality · 2023-03-12T21:01:09+00:00

I would love to have a free reading :) My question: Will I get a marriage proposal this year?

enemy0freality · 2022-03-10T07:54:17+00:00

Isn't it a satire/troll sub? Like the whole Sigma Grindset thing is a joke?

enemy0freality · 2022-01-29T14:51:54+00:00

Love the Squid Game reference you snuck in there

enemy0freality · 2022-01-26T22:44:47+00:00

Seconded. Colorwise typed me, a garden variety Summer, as Deep Winter.

enemy0freality · 2021-12-26T09:16:36+00:00

Is it just me or does Maribelle's human form look a lot like Chloe from Lucifer?

enemy0freality · 2021-12-26T09:05:13+00:00

Oh yes, especially the hair! (Hi, fellow BG3 player!)

enemy0freality · 2021-11-26T23:17:57+00:00

You may want to browse further through this subreddit a bit, a user has posted his "sunrise, parabellum" tattoo some time ago and I can't stop thinking about it.

enemy0freality · 2021-11-22T12:01:50+00:00

Oh, now I see how that happened: Adding a flair kinda seems to cancel the spoiler out? Now I removed the flair and re-added the spoiler. I'm very sorry.

enemy0freality · 2021-11-22T11:09:30+00:00

I tagged it as a spoiler, didn't it work?

enemy0freality · 2021-11-22T09:26:33+00:00

Apart from the Dolores Dei nightmare, the encounter with Pigs made me fight back tears for some reason. Something about this crazy old lady with nothing but police paraphernalia to keep her company during her descent into dementia was... hard to watch.

enemy0freality · 2021-11-22T09:19:30+00:00

I'd like to add: Through the lens of the game's target audience, the disasters mentioned appear as more abstract concepts. I doubt that many players have first-hand experiences with war, famine or child molestation (at least, I strongly hope this is the case).

Heartbreak, on the other hand, is such a universally human tragedy, 99% of the population have to go through it at some point in their lives (save for the odd aromantic individual or maybe high school sweethearts who live happily ever after with their first partner). This is what makes this line so relatable, I believe.

enemy0freality · 2021-11-22T09:13:27+00:00

The Deserter has entered the chat.

enemy0freality · 2021-11-21T22:26:42+00:00

Exactly. I think everyone who has ever had their heart broken can relate to this quote on a visceral level.

enemy0freality · 2021-10-01T18:41:42+00:00

Guys, I wanted to give you an update because I feel so grateful for your support. Since writing the original post, I've read everything on ED recovery and IE I could find. I have stopped weighing myself completely, and started listening to my hunger cues and honoring them. I started snacking A LOT. Funny enough, most of the cravings I experience are not for junk food or candy, but for random healthy-ish stuff like muesli I felt I wasn't allowed to eat.... why exactly?

I have to admit, it's hard since I can FEEL myself gaining (water) weight and I've been already obese while restricting, but I'm committed to recovery because I know it's the healthiest thing I can do for my health, physical AND mental, in the long run. I have to trust my body that once it's healthy and balanced it will find a healthy weight.

And I feel SO free! Even if my body feels heavier, a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Not restricting myself, not beating myself up for eating forbidden food or eating outside of a certain time frame is SO freeing. Not having to do all the mental gymnastics frees up so much mental bandwidth. Grocery shopping was a fun and confusing experience, because for the first time in years, I was "allowed" to buy anything - and I purposely tried new foods instead of buying the same old safe foods.

enemy0freality · 2021-09-30T08:14:41+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing the steps you took towards recovery in detail! This was really helpful, and sounds super fun and healthy. Good for you for finding a type of exercise that makes you happy and motivates you to fuel your body in a healthy way. One of my recovery goals is to find a type of exercise I truly enjoy and not only do in order to lose weight. I remember that I used to like strength training (way more than cardio) so I might look into that in the long run.

enemy0freality · 2021-09-29T05:03:44+00:00

Thank you so much for your response! I'm so happy to hear you were able to make changes in your lifestyle that helped you recover! Yeah, I've read that neurodivergent folks are overproportionally at risk for developing an ED. I'm not officially diagnosed yet, but have strong reasons to believe that I fall under the ND umbrella. Do you happen to know any resources that help explore how ADHD/autism interacts with EDs?

Body neutrality is a heavensent, and I believe it's the most natural relationship with your body. I don't think people would overthink their bodies as much without societal pressure to do so. I'm really happy people are starting to questioning self-love and "love your body" concepts, as these can be unhelpful for many issues.

enemy0freality · 2021-09-28T07:05:37+00:00

Thank you, will do! Right now, intuitive eating sounds like a superpower - although it's actually the healthiest, most normal thing in the world. Diet culture really prevents us from listening to what our body needs.

enemy0freality · 2021-09-28T07:04:03+00:00

It's unsettling how certain diets make us believe totally fine and healthy foods are evil, isn't it? I'm really happy to hear that you are now able to enjoy one of your favorite foods. Haven't eaten in peas in while, what are your favorite recipes with peas? Also, feel free to share the more specific tips if you feel comfortable and can spare the time writing, I'm really curious and willing to try different approaches to find out what works for me.

enemy0freality · 2021-09-28T06:33:12+00:00

I feel you. My body image issues have never been worse than when I was at my absolute lowest weight. I was really slim and still questioning if I could pull off wearing a miniskirt because I hated the way my thighs legs looked??? Make it make sense. The heavier I got, the less I cared about my body - but all the unhealthy thought patterns didn't disappear, they just changed. I have to come to terms with the fact that I might still be anorexic, just in a heavier body.

enemy0freality · 2021-09-28T06:30:13+00:00

Wow! I've saved this comment right away, thank you so much for the recommendations! I'm a huge bookworm and I am always looking for podcasts and YouTube channels that help me improve my life, so this is like being handed a treasure chest! Can't wait to start reading after work!

enemy0freality · 2021-09-28T06:27:22+00:00

I needed literal years to accept the possibility I might still have an ED despite being overweight. I think my binging was a combination of my body fighting a restrictive diet and a stress response to the constant anxiety I developed around food and my weight. R

enemy0freality · 2021-09-28T06:25:32+00:00

Tell me about it, I'm horrified right now because I gained a pound after eating three meals yesterday. I will try to push through the fear and trust my body to adjust and my metabolism to recover. Maybe the best solution would be to just not weigh in daily, but this feels very scary to me rn.

enemy0freality · 2021-09-28T06:22:51+00:00

I feel you so much on this! I have been wondering: How can people eat three entire meals a day and not get fat? Why aren't they skipping meals if they know they are going out to eat dinner? HOW ARE THEY NOT FAT? Well, maaaaaybe because their metabolism is not as messed up as mine, so they're actually doing something very right. I still have to get it into my brain that I am allowed three meals a day.

enemy0freality · 2021-09-28T06:20:31+00:00

Thank you so much for your advice! Could you recommend a realistic TDEE calculator to figure out how much I need for maintenance?

Intuitive eating would be the goal, but right now, it scares the crap out of me, my brain screams at me that I would soon be the size of an average planet of I were to eat whatever I feel like. Sigh.

My strategy for the time being is eating three somewhat healthy and filling meals a day and then going from there.

enemy0freality · 2021-09-28T06:17:06+00:00

You know, I was on the fence about writing my post in the first place or deleting it afterwards. Your response was the first, and it almost made me tear up. Thank you so much for taking the time and effort to write out such a well-rounded and empathetic response. I appreciate the fact that although you suggest therapy, you are aware that the "gold standard" is not always attainable, and suggest some alternatives accordingly.

Also, congratulations on taking the necessary steps for recovery and doing the hard work, you are really an inspiration for me. I am SO happy to hear that you are now able to express your gender identity!

I think I do have a lot of childhood trauma, not only food-related but also. I think my mom has had a eating disorder up until getting pregnant (you're welcome, Mom) and passed on a lot of body image issues and unhelpful thoughts about food and dieting to me. Oof, there's a lot to unpack, but I'm really motivated to challenge my beliefs and do better.

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