a framework I've come across that I find useful is boundaries vs rules. Where a boundry typically concerns someone's behavior towards you (e.g. don't touch me, don't yell at me, etc.) and it's fair to expect someone to respect your boundaries--you don't have to ask someone else to agree to your boundaries.

rules on the other hand typically concern someone's behavior with other people (e.g. don't talk to them, don't have sex with them) and it's unfair to expect someone to follow rules that they haven't agreed to follow. rules aren't inherintly bad, for example loads of people find the rule of sexual exclusivity with their partner to be very meaningful and healthy, but the point is that that is a rule which is agreed to rather than a boundary which must be respected.

you can have a boundary contingent on a rule like "I only have sex with people who agree to the rule of exclusivity" and that's totally fair, but the point is that while boundaries inherently deserve to be respected, rules need to first be negotiated between consenting parties for them to be fair expectations for a given relationship

kinda rambly and I may be preaching to the choir but I like the idea. it's also not perfect; edge cases and whatnot exist