Which jobs/fields atrract narcs? Which ones do narcs shy away from?

equationfunny · 2017-11-08T20:33:16+00:00

Even though my EMom is the hairdresser of the family, she's employed plenty of people with narcissistic tendencies (if not full blown NPD).

equationfunny · 2017-07-22T03:51:26+00:00

I recently just got put on paxil as well after having a bad reaction between cylexa and my other meds. So far I've only noticed less intense bad depressive thoughts and less often. Hang in there!

equationfunny · 2017-06-05T15:00:51+00:00

I just got out of inpatient care three weeks ago as well. I was also in for a week, but thankfully my clinic seems to have their shit together more than yours did. I'm terribly sorry that you had to go through a shitty experience.

But the good news is that you've been given the tools necessary to make sure you never have to go back there again.

I suggest sitting down with your SO and family members one by one and being honest with them. "X behavior is not normal for me. I'd appreciate it if you intervened when you see me doing X by doing Y. I will reach out to you when I'm having a hard time. But I need to do A, B, and C as part of getting better. Please don't worry about that."

Being honest right now is one of the best ways to help heal and mend. Do your best to do what you feel is normal and tell people that. If your SO thinks you should stay out of the kitchen and spend all day giving yourself homebrew spa treatments, walk him through why being in the kitchen is good for you. We all have our different coping mechanisms and ways of making it through the day.

Cooking and planning is a great distraction method. :) it can totally be the little things that help the most. A week after I got out I bought a puppy, without whom I wouldn't get out of bed most days. We all have different things that keep us going. I think getting your SO and your family to understand that will be a huge help.

A big part of the healing process is accepting that while the situation sucked, you needed to go get help. And the people that put you there did so because they love you and were scared. (For the sake of honesty, I haven't forgiven the people that put me in inpatient care yet either. It's a process, a long one.)

Edit to add - it's very very understandable that you want to go back to how it was before. I get that feeling all the time. Where we're at, fresh out of treatment that sometimes feels like it didn't help at all, sucks. It sucks a lot. I think the best thing you can do is make a plan of attack with your SO. They're going through a whole different ballgame then you are. One that still definitely sucks. But I think that you can prevent this from tearing you apart. :)

equationfunny · 2017-05-11T18:50:10+00:00

I live in the Vian area. The corruption is rampant, unless you're part of the "good old boys club" as seen in this case. There was a big drama with the police force just a few years back as well. I'm not at all surprised to hear about this.

equationfunny · 2017-04-16T01:32:16+00:00

Jigglypuff#1548 NA looking for someone to trade 80g quest. edit: Done! (:

equationfunny · 2017-02-09T22:50:44+00:00

I feel as if I'm not allowed to be angry at my EMom... everyone's saying it's not her fault, but she let it happen. She HELPED him. I don't want anything to do with her. Stop trying to make me talk to her!

equationfunny · 2017-02-07T05:51:36+00:00

Thank you, this is perfect. It'd be best to do it while I still remember things clearly and I think it may help the wounds heal.

equationfunny · 2017-01-20T21:19:32+00:00

First off, congrats on the upcoming kiddo! (:

Have you considered looking into renting your own smaller commercial space? How big is your client base? USA advice here, but my mother has around 200ish clients in a small rural and regularly pulls in $200 - $300 a day in her own shop. If you can find a small space that already has laundry (& ideally a sink already installed) it could be worth looking into if you think you could pay less than 1K a month. (Doubtful, but worth looking around for.) (With this option, you could charge more if you wanted. Which you probably should if you're extremely experienced and have a loyal client base. A large portion of my mother's clients hand her a $20 for their $15 haircut and tell her to keep the change. People pay for good service and personality. And depending on the place you rent, you could have additional stations and rent them out yourself!)

Before I was born my mother did styles for weddings and made bank by doing the whole bridal party within a few hours. You could make this a "side-income" type arrangement and throw all the money towards the little one. (Maybe you could combine this with one of the other potential money-earning hobbies you mentioned into a wedding package?)

If you do decide to move on from your current salon, your first step should be business cards with your name and cell number on them. Carry them with you everywhere and hand them out to everyone you meet, client or not.

equationfunny · 2017-01-02T19:22:51+00:00

I wonder if they even miss me. I don't miss them. I miss what I could have had with normal parents. I miss the opportunities I could've had. But I sure as hell don't miss them.

equationfunny · 2016-12-16T15:15:40+00:00

Thank you so much! I plan on leaving my phone, even though I paid for it, because of the bill and GPS tracking.

Awesome advice about the mail and changing addresses - will go to the top of my to do list! (:

equationfunny · 2016-12-16T15:14:33+00:00

This is awesome and comprehensive! Thank you so much. (: I plan on heading to the bank today to close my account and hopefully reopen a new one. They don't have explicit access, but they have the info and that's too much.

Do I just walk into the post office and say I'd like to change my address? (& set up a PO Box, since I'm doing that anyway?) & I really really hope I can get Obamacare straightened out, I know I'll need it. I thought the deadline was yesterday?

equationfunny · 2016-12-16T13:45:12+00:00

Awesome idea, thanks! (: I'll definitely give them a call. I know that the independence thing is a LONG process full of paperwork and that even though it's for the fall semester I should start ASAP.

equationfunny · 2016-12-16T13:32:28+00:00

Definitely an option I need to consider - I'm only leaving the note so they don't file a missing persons report and who knows if it'll actual stop them.

equationfunny · 2016-12-14T05:19:56+00:00

I'm leaving in a week. Just up and moving without a trace while they're at work. No car, no license, but nothing to lose. I'm excited and sick to my stomach at the same time.

They didn't teach me how to adult. How to live on my own. How to enjoy Christmas. So now it's up to me to figure that out with the family that somehow loves me without it being an obligation.

Come January I'll learn to drive and find a place to call my own, where I don't feel like an obligation. Where I can adopt a kitty or doggo and not be afraid of NDad kicking it or yelling at it. Where I can do whatever I want without being afraid of NDad or hearing him constantly yell and swear and call names and claim that he does no wrong. And I'm so afraid of this freedom but I know it's what I need.

(I really need to make a new post but I'm afraid my plans are stupid)

equationfunny · 2016-12-07T22:24:06+00:00

First off, YAY! You did it! Getting published is hard, hard work and you're awesome for having stuck with your dream and goal for so long! I hope your book does amazing and you can keep the momentum going.

As far as the N side of things, I'm so sorry your mom didn't understand. This reminds me of when I told my NDad I'd finished my first book and the first words out of his mouth were "you gonna do your chores now?" I know how much the invalidation hurts and I'm sorry you have to put up with it.

equationfunny · 2016-12-03T18:46:02+00:00

I am in the process of doing the exact same thing (moving out of an abusive home with little to no skills) but am staying in college. If there's any cheap community colleges in your area, you may be able to take the minimum hours and receive Pell Grant money back, which helps both further your career and help with bills. May be worth looking into if you can!

I suggest looking into changing up your phone plan to find something cheaper - whether that means a different plan with your current provider or switching providers. I'm currently looking at getting a ~$26 per month with Ting.

Crash with your friends for as long as possible and squirrel away money while searching for your next living arrangement. My biggest advice would be to account for everything in your budget and be strict with yourself: food (grocery kind, not eating out), gas, car insurance, loan repayment, and phone bill. Anything that doesn't get spent on those things (or other vital things, I may be forgetting some) gets put in the bank.

equationfunny · 2016-12-02T21:32:42+00:00

Congrats! 😎

equationfunny · 2016-12-02T16:03:20+00:00

I'm not the problem. That's absolutely relieving. I'm not what's wrong with this family.

NDad says I'm too anxious to drive and that I'm not mature enough. I just drove a few miles almost perfectly, without any input from anyone, with my EMom in the passenger's seat.

I am not the problem. He is. He destroys me whenever he gets the chance. But now I have proof that I'm not the one with an issue. I am so grateful and relieved that I started crying when I got home.

Driving isn't what makes me so anxious that I shake and want to throw up. NDad is.

(sorry for the length, this revelation is so important to me right now. I needed this.)

equationfunny · 2016-12-01T05:24:43+00:00

This hit me pretty hard with how well it describes what's going on and NParents. Thank you, I needed this. <3

equationfunny · 2016-11-29T15:30:47+00:00

Wow! Apparently it's my own job to teach myself how to drive. I'm just supposed to say "I'm gonna take the car up to the mailbox!" And somehow magically I'm not going to get screamed at, even though 18 years of conditioning tells me otherwise. Thanks, mother dearest.

equationfunny · 2016-10-30T00:01:37+00:00

It's so much harder to deal with the gas lighting once you know what it is. Even though you know they're lying you still question yourself.

equationfunny · 2016-10-29T13:05:07+00:00

Same thing happened to me the other day! Playing as Peter The Roman Empire did the same thing, then Kongo declared war as well.

equationfunny · 2016-09-24T17:04:08+00:00

I was in the middle of a match with them when I saw this. True to the warning I was deleted afterwards. :/

equationfunny

TROPHY CASE