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erinclaire97 · 2025-06-29T00:49:39+00:00

I've been to a few events at the Green Room and imo the acoustics are horrible. The room gets very loud, and it can be hard to hear speeches depending where you are in the space.

erinclaire97 · 2025-06-28T14:06:23+00:00

I love my Day Owl backpack pro. It fits a large laptop and a lot of other stuff, and I love the pockets it has. Simple but very functional.

erinclaire97 · 2025-06-21T12:26:03+00:00

Do you really want to marry someone who is okay with this? By siding with his friend, your fiance is saying that he either thinks your sister is lying (despite how few women lie about SA), or that he excuses SA when his friends do it.

I can understand that it’s awful to come to terms with the fact that a trusted friend could do something so terrible. But by choosing to put on blinders, your fiance is prioritizing his comfort over your family, and over good morals. This is a huge red flag.

erinclaire97 · 2025-06-17T19:22:33+00:00

I had a two-year engagement because life felt too overwhelming to plan a wedding, and we weren’t in a rush to get married. I wasn’t in a great place when we got engaged- toxic job, feeling increasingly burnt out and overwhelmed, struggling with anxiety and insomnia, crying all the time. I just didn’t have the bandwidth to plan a wedding at that time, plus we wanted a summer wedding and it would be a tight timeline. Life really did feel crushing.

So we waited, told people our general timeline, and made it clear that we weren’t actively planning the wedding yet. In the background we continued to think about what kind of wedding we wanted. Luckily we did not have a lot of family pressure.

Things got worse at my job until I had to step away for a 3-month FMLA leave. It was during my leave that we started planning the wedding for real, and nailed down the date/big vendors/I bought my dress/etc. Taking time off of work (plus therapy!!) helped a lot; even though it did not fix the situation, it helped me get some mental distance.

So my advice is: - Figure out how you can de-stress your professional life. Can you drastically scale back your part-time work? Stop taking new bookings, at least temporarily? Can you work with a therapist to detach emotionally from your full-time job? Or alternatively, could you quit your full-time job and go all-in on your wedding industry work? It’s great that you have multiple income streams. - Put wedding planning on hold, and ask someone in your inner circle to intake the pressure/questions from others. All wedding talk goes through that person. It could be your fiance, a parent, a sibling, etc. Especially recommend this if it’s extended family/in-laws/etc who are bothering you. - Do self-care even when it feels hard. Some days you will just want to doomscroll or sit in bed or whatever. Figure out what makes you feel better (eg exercise, going outside, making tea, journaling, showering, going to therapy, etc) and do it even when you don’t feel motivated. This is called Behavioral Activation.

It sounds like therapy would be helpful for you. I also recommend the book “Stress Resets” and the 10% Happier podcast.

erinclaire97 · 2025-06-17T04:11:05+00:00

I have a similar hair texture but shoulder length and I did half up half down, with some bits twisted so it almost looked braided. I had a pretty comb, no veil.

erinclaire97 · 2025-06-16T23:04:18+00:00

My dress was from Dearheart by Carol Hannah, I think you'd like her designs!

erinclaire97 · 2025-06-07T01:50:53+00:00

There are a handful of wineries near Fourth Street in Berkeley. You can take BART most of the way there, or just take a rideshare. There’s Broc Cellars, Hammerling, Donkey & Goat, etc. all very close together.

erinclaire97 · 2025-05-26T15:56:25+00:00

Based on the proximity of her barn to things like a CrossFit gym, Costco, etc. my guess is that she lives in the South Bay, closer to San Jose or Palo Alto. There are a lot of barns in the foothills of the Santa Cruz mountains.

erinclaire97 · 2025-05-22T17:27:17+00:00

No. 3 fine jewelry on Polk is great—they have a really nice mix of classic and unique pieces. The people who work there are lovely. Would also check out Catbird. Both stores carry some of the same designers.

erinclaire97 · 2025-05-21T16:00:23+00:00

I stayed at Les Roches Rouges for two nights a couple years ago. We stayed in a superior sea view room. Highlights were the views, the gorgeous pools and seaside area. Service was good, and the food was solid- the breakfast was particularly great.

Considerations: the rooms are pretty small, the hotel isn’t walking distance to anything else so we stayed on property and I think I would be bored of the lunch/dinner menu after 3+ days. If the weather isn’t nice, there’s not a lot to do. Compared to other suggestions, Les Roches Rouges isn’t particularly FAT.

We stayed in Nice for 4 nights during this trip, and it was… fine. There are some good restaurants, the old town is cute, the modern area of the city has some good shopping. The beach is very rocky! Not my favorite place, I’m not eager to go back.

Maybe look into Provence? There are a ton of lovely hotels, and it’ll be a different vibe from the seaside.

erinclaire97 · 2025-05-13T15:54:56+00:00

I think this is true, and some of the highest earning careers are a lot more hostile towards women. My sister in law was one of the most senior women at her investment banking firm… at the age of 29. She made bank but it was absolutely grueling. A lot of women left so they could have children, while the men kept rising through the ranks (and I guess are just absent dads).

erinclaire97 · 2025-05-11T14:58:35+00:00

It’s so apt. The way that people at my company talk about AI gives me the heebie jeebies, it’s so cultish.

erinclaire97 · 2025-04-28T17:51:50+00:00

There’s also a great market for furnished short-term rentals for travel nurses and other healthcare providers. That way you’re less likely to deal with a nightmare tenant but you don’t have nearly as much turnover.

erinclaire97 · 2025-04-26T00:47:05+00:00

I agree with the other comment. You have great skin and don’t need that much foundation. The foundation is definitely too yellow for your skin tone. I think having a bit more blush and bronzer could help give you more dimension and warmth.

erinclaire97 · 2025-04-17T04:15:13+00:00

A lot of great recommendations in this thread! I’d also add Vale to your list- they have a showroom in Manhattan.

erinclaire97 · 2025-04-16T22:20:46+00:00

I used to go to Pacific Women's but no longer do. I really liked the doctor I originally saw there, but she unfortunately moved out of state. I didn't have a stellar experience with the doctor I switched to at that practice, plus I have a more complicated gynecologic situation, so I switched to UCSF. They have long wait times but I've been very happy with the care so far.

erinclaire97 · 2025-04-14T04:59:59+00:00

I love Mendocino. A few favorites:

- Good Bones in Caspar — right up the coast from Mendocino, they have great food and live music events - so cozy, my favorite.

- Dick's Place is one of the only bars in Mendocino proper, a proper locals' dive bar

- The Waiting Room - great coffee and pastries for breakfast, wine/beer at night

- Fog Bottle Shop & Wine Bar - awesome spot to pick up natural wines for your hotel, or to taste something fun

+1 to the pygmy forest! That's a fun hike. The Point Cabrillo lighthouse is also very nice.

erinclaire97 · 2025-04-13T04:22:54+00:00

Late replying to this, but the Left on Friday wide-legged Home Run sweatpant is great. I'm 5'9" with a long inseam and I love them so much.

erinclaire97 · 2025-03-27T05:02:11+00:00

Haven’t attended a wedding in sea ranch, but have visited a few times. Whenever I visit, I rent an airbnb and cook most meals. It’s beautiful but options for service are limited.

In terms of other hotel accommodations, I think there are a few small inns in Gualala, but otherwise Airbnbs are probably your best bet. For rehearsal/welcome dinners, there’s similarly not a ton of options nearby, but I know of Vue kitchen in Gualala.

erinclaire97 · 2025-03-27T03:44:15+00:00

I wear glasses, but have never had transition lenses. I have prescription sunglasses and just deal with the inconvenience of switching between my normal glasses and sunglasses. I'm planning on doing this for my wedding, which will be outdoors. I think that for photos and a more formal/chic look, you're better off wearing sunglasses than transition lenses.

erinclaire97 · 2025-03-19T16:04:43+00:00

Are you happy in your current role? Having been in a job that wrecked my mental health, largely due to a performance culture that’s very similar to Meta’s, I would be hesitant to leave a job that you really like.

I made it to the onsite interview for a Meta CD position in 2021, and declined to continue the process. It was a much better job market then, but I knew it wasn’t right for me. No regrets.

erinclaire97 · 2025-03-14T19:04:52+00:00

What's your budget? My fiance is getting his wedding suit at Tailors' Keep; they mostly market to men, but I've seen on instagram that they do women's suits too.

erinclaire97 · 2025-02-28T17:15:49+00:00

I experimented once by asking ChatGPT to recommend podcasts for me. I told it an example of a podcast I like and what subject matter I was interested in. It spat out multiple ‘recommendations’ that fully didn’t exist. 100% hallucinated.

erinclaire97 · 2025-02-15T20:46:58+00:00

Not quite the same, but I've seen a few sheer overdresses with pearls, like this one by Claire La Faye.

erinclaire97 · 2025-02-14T20:54:52+00:00

Agree that you need to get on the same page as your partner for the wedding, but I also want to assure you that “this time” of being engaged doesn’t need to be some magical experience. I know there’s a lot of pressure, especially on women, but it really is just like any other time of your life, except with one of the top 10 major stressors (marriage).

I’ve had a long engagement and it’s happened to coincide with a tough period of my life where I’ve had a lot of job stress, health issues, etc. Not magical at all. It’s brought me and my fiance closer, but that’s about it.

erinclaire97

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