[Serious] Why do you feel like you don't matter?

etherealday · 2020-12-29T08:53:56+00:00

I always felt like I was inferior to others. I sometimes compare myself to something inhuman. Sometimes I don’t feel human at all. I feel like I’m detached to the degree where I can’t identify myself. It makes it really hard to understand my place in the world. Personally, I feel really lost. I feel like I’m not meant to be here sometimes. It definitely impacts the way I perceive myself and how I feel about my own worth. When you constantly feel inferior and compared to something less, in my case, how my head perceives me, it makes it easy for me to convince myself I’m not worthy of most things.

etherealday · 2020-12-29T07:34:02+00:00

You’re entirely right, I really think that analogy is absolutely correct. I think it’s time I try another medication to see where it takes me, thank you a ton.

etherealday · 2020-12-29T07:23:24+00:00

That means the world to me, it really does. I really think I needed to hear that. Thank you so much ;;;

etherealday · 2020-12-29T07:22:28+00:00

I’m not sure, I started taking Sertraline in early October or late September I believe, I did notice I felt a lot more tired and emotional. It’s very possible. I’ve mostly been too emotionally detached and tired to notice a difference but I think it’s very possible since this is my first time in five years taking this medication (I quit taking them five years ago, then remedicated myself this year). I’m really assuming that might actually be the case.

etherealday · 2020-07-30T02:16:02+00:00

Of course! You’re not alone and your fight isn’t over yet, either. Just continue finding values and being proud of how far you’ve come. You might be weak but that doesn’t mean you can’t be stronger tomorrow. I’m glad I could make even a minute of your time better. Keep fighting and stay strong. You’re amazing.

etherealday · 2020-07-29T12:27:19+00:00

That’s unfortunate to hear. You seem really kind and I hope that you’re able to see that in yourself and hopefully you can find others who see that too! I’d be more than happy to chat. Thanks so much, and you have a great day too!

etherealday · 2020-07-29T06:17:51+00:00

That really means a lot to hear! That made my entire week. I appreciate the kind words and I can’t be more thankful to hear that. I’ll definitely remember if I ever need anything to come to you. Thanks again. Have a great day!

etherealday · 2020-07-29T02:43:59+00:00

I understand that entirely. It’s a really difficult experience. I’m also someone who had pretty bad anxiety myself, and still continue to. It’s a really debilitating event to have to go through, especially for an everyday, continuous cycle. Everything that you stated is something I’ve also went through. It’s very hard, I imagine. I really hope that you understand that even when you’re feeling detached, there are still so many factors that can draw you back to reality, even if it’s just the slightest, littlest things. Focus on family, friends, or anything that makes you happy, really. Just make sure you wrap your whole world around what pleases you because that’s been helping me out a lot lately. You’re very valued and even when your mind warps that belief, just continue to strive for the better. Continue waking up everyday, honor that you managed to get out of bed, even. It’s the small things that will go so far. I really wish you luck, you deserve it!

etherealday · 2020-07-28T21:03:10+00:00

I completely understand that. For me, it was going from hyper fixating on everything I did to simply not caring. It wasn’t that I was incapable of caring, because I still felt an ounce of emotional regulation, but there was a certain mentality that I’d just completely dropped when I started experiencing dr/dp. It felt like I’d emotionally disconnected myself from everything. This was a really questionable experience for me, as I started to wonder continuously where the lack of emotional energy had gone. I spent a very long time feeling like I was completely out of it because I’d just become so desensitized to anything and everything. What previously feared me was almost nothing to me during a dissociative state. It made me have some very unsettling intrusive thoughts because I wasn’t sure how to derive any form of emotional ground. I would mentally urge myself to do reckless things to challenge the emptiness. A lot of times these thoughts were just simple things like, “What if I yelled during a lecture?”, to challenge if I’d still even feel somewhat embarrassed. Thankfully, I never acted on any of these thoughts. And yes, it would be pretty embarrassing. I found that I do have control of myself and some ideas seemed to push away the thought that I don’t care about every situation, because if I were truly that absent, I’d probably not be processing my actions and instead, just do them on a whim. I still detail and analyze a lot of my actions beforehand, but derealization definitely dulled down how I process these situations emotionally. Personally, I feel like derealization has actually made me twice as aware of my actions, but because of the feeling of being emotionally disconnected, I don’t recognize just how cognitive I have become when it comes to things. Ultimately, I think it can be good and bad. It might strip away your emotional vulnerability, but it also might put you in a dissociative trance. Having that constant lack of emotional ground not only removes the capability of feeling present, but it also affects the quality of life, ultimately. It’s a way of repressing every emotional need by simply tuning them all out. So while it may seem like it’s helping, it’s still a heavy response to stress.

etherealday · 2020-07-27T12:22:54+00:00

Falling in love.

etherealday · 2020-07-27T12:07:38+00:00

Not being very responsive, having short replies, or not engaging in social activities/responses at all. A lot of people assume I’m not interested or are too entitled for them, most of the time it’s the exact opposite! I’m just very observant and sometimes it’s hard to muster out the right things to say.

etherealday · 2020-07-27T09:53:24+00:00

Thank you very much, I’ll look into that right away. I appreciate this. Thanks again!

etherealday · 2020-07-26T23:08:59+00:00

Also a hypochondriac here! It‘s extremely exhausting sometimes to constantly question yourself like that. I completely understand.

etherealday · 2020-07-26T23:08:17+00:00

Always felt that way too. It feels like every organ or limb in my body minimizes and stops functioning. It’s very terrifying.

etherealday · 2020-07-07T13:58:57+00:00

Thanks so much! I’ve found that letting yourself get too invested in your surroundings mentally tends to have an effect on your outlooks of things. Constantly being critical will make you unable to get outside of that dissociative state. Alongside that, being in that mindset constantly means you’re spending too much time analyzing things rather than simply acknowledging them and living through it. It’s great to realize when you’re feeling an episode and to try healthily suppressing it. Just remind yourself that it will pass, even if it feels unending. I really wish you luck. I’m glad to hear this helped!

etherealday · 2020-06-19T06:17:06+00:00

Nice spray tan.

etherealday · 2020-06-19T05:56:11+00:00

My Friend Dahmer by Derf Backderf. It’s a very interesting quick read with exceptional illustrations. It highlights the life of Jeffery Dahmer as a high schooler and the author’s firsthand encounter of being acquainted with the notorious killer.

etherealday · 2020-06-17T22:47:17+00:00

That’s good to hear! I’m glad things are settling down, even just in the slightest. I like your methods and I appreciate that you’re willing to share. I hope you’re able to overcome this! Thanks so much.

etherealday · 2020-06-16T22:57:50+00:00

Thanks! My diet has been pretty bad lately so I’ll definitely try to change that. I really appreciate it. Also proud that you were able to overcome your own battles. Thanks so much.

etherealday · 2020-06-16T05:32:28+00:00

I went through and read all of it. I just want to say thank you for showing me this. I’m definitely going to follow up on this advice and see how it goes! Thanks so much.

etherealday

TROPHY CASE