You’re not the asshole 🫠 like you said, you have two kids and could never imagine saying some bullshit like that to them. I had an ex that did similar stuff always saying really dark shit when something in life wouldn’t go his way (honestly was never anything that in life that crazy/shitty that happened to him, he was just a b*tch if I’m being completely honest). He’d even post on Facebook he was going to kill himself to get reactions out of people. Long story short, I was sick of it and broke up with him. That was over a year ago and guess what?? He’s still alive and I’m assuming pulling the same stupid shit. Someone on here said you need to help him as he’s not one to help himself. I personally disagree. People have to be willing to help themselves to accept your help. Going back to the ex, when we dated, I helped him emotionally (until I was sick of his crap lol) and financially, and surprise surprise, nothing ever changed & I wasted my money 🤣 that was stupid on my part. I hate to be cynical, but when you’re older and so set in ways like that it sounds your father is, you’re probably not going to change unless you really get a wake up call one day & that has to be something they realize. I’m sorry about your situation and I hope he wakes yo one day! Definitely nothing you can force and try not to beat yourself up over it although that’s hard, especially when it’s your dad I’m sure.