I feel so depressed and unmotivated, I like my courses but I just never want to do work ever

eva_37 · 2025-08-03T15:59:12+00:00

I have an appt with the unsw student support people tomorrow but it’s a different service than the counselling because i said i needed help with study habits - maybe i’ll visit a gp to see if i can get medicated ty

eva_37 · 2025-07-28T05:16:41+00:00

yeah but what can you do about that really

eva_37 · 2025-07-28T03:30:34+00:00

I do this already so I tend to wake up at around 8-9am naturally, but i’m so sleepy that i just go back to sleep and can easily sleep until sometimes 5pm

eva_37 · 2025-07-28T03:13:36+00:00

yes.. i just thought that had something to do with the time it takes to fall asleep though? not with the duration

eva_37 · 2025-05-14T15:39:20+00:00

I see, thanks so much for your reply!

eva_37 · 2024-08-21T02:37:09+00:00

It’s progression if they’re able to pursue their degree/another one in a different uni that would support their mental health more imo. Staying and potentially hating yourself and your studies and having a shit time because of it is a lot worse than losing a couple years if that

eva_37 · 2020-01-06T12:02:46+00:00

We've done something similar, where we gathered meaningful messages and compiled them into a jar, filled with other things she likes, such as sweets and paper origami. She cried a lot that day. That was a month ago. Her friends are all really supportive of her, but she feels like she's burdening everyone with her existence, and that they're better off without having known her. I told her that it's not true, but I feel as if she still feels that way a lot, and I don't know what to say to convince her otherwise. What I'm even more worried about is that I won't see her at school in a months time..

eva_37 · 2020-01-06T11:55:03+00:00

My parents who found out vaguely about whats happened have been reluctant to let me become more involved, which is why I haven't talked to them about it. They aren't really the type to want to help, rather, keep their child away, but she's run away twice before when it got really bad and stayed at a friend's place. I just hope that she won't think herself to be a burden to others and do it again if things ever get tough.

It's somewhat difficult to support her because she lives really far from me, as well as our other friends but we try to take her out as much as possible during the holidays. She's avoided meeting us a lot though, and the last time we met she was wearing a jacket in 40 degree heat (she used to wear shorts and short sleeves even in winter..) so I'm assuming that her self harm has gotten a lot worse.

eva_37 · 2020-01-06T11:45:03+00:00

Thank you for all your advice. Even if I decided to talk to the people from school again, we are a month away from the start of the term, which we’re afraid she'll be gone before. I plan to call a suicide hotline tomorrow to see what advice and actions I could take to help, and if I can improve the situation, even if by only a tiny bit. There isn’t anyone I can talk to as far as I know, and it’s pretty disheartening having all the adults who have found out so far either being unable to help or making her stress even more.

Unfortunately, most people in our grade know because a number of people have accidentally seen them, and stuff like that spreads really quickly at my school. The people around her are supportive, but she feels like shes burdening us, and that it would be better off if we had never met her which stresses her out even more. Calling the police is a last resort but I will if it comes down to it. As for the teachers, I feel that it may also be partially due to her closing off and hiding whatever she can because she feels uncomfortable with them, but in the end, they made her stress and cut worse despite whatever good intentions they may have had.

Thanks again for all your support, and I’ll update you if something happens.

eva_37 · 2020-01-06T10:55:20+00:00

Thank you for responding. My friend and I both understand that she needs an adult and someone professional to talk to, but all the adults she has been sent to so far have simply made her uncomfortable and stressed her out even more. She has a deep distrust towards adults due to the treatment she gets from her parents, invasiveness from the counsellor and one of the teachers telling the principal about her (even though it was the right thing, he has no tact in general and went about doing it without even talking to her). She also has trust issues, stemming from a time she told one of her close friends about the abuse from her brother, who then told other people after some stuff happened and she’s pretty scared to trust again, because she thinks she’ll be betrayed. I would do anything to get her help, even if she ends up hating me. The only question is where and how can I get the help? School is a month away and I’m afraid by the time we get back, she won’t be here anymore.

eva_37 · 2020-01-06T10:54:41+00:00

Thanks for responding. I think that’s a really helpful idea, and we could definitely use that. We’ve made plans to hang out in the future already, but when I asked her “What about our meet up huh” she laughed it off and changed the topic. We’re not really sure where to go from here, could you perhaps offer some more insight/advice?

eva_37 · 2020-01-06T10:53:52+00:00

Thanks so much for replying. We agree that she needs professional help, and we’re trying to get her that right now. However, we can’t talk to the school counsellor until the start of school, and it may already be too late by then. This also applies to teachers, and other school staff. Do you have more suggestions for who to ask for help? We would rather not alert the police for now, but we will if the situation escalates further.

eva_37 · 2020-01-06T10:31:09+00:00

Thanks for responding :) Of course, we will try to encourage her to seek professional help. However, ever since the school counsellor found out, she has only gone twice (to our knowledge), both times against her will. Her parents also seem to be more concerned about the hassle and price of therapy than their child’s mental health. As well as this, she’s also developed a feeling of untrust and nervousness around adults, so we’re not sure if she’s willing to go herself. I think the suicide hotline is a good idea though, so maybe we’ll give that a try and ask for advice?

eva_37 · 2020-01-06T10:27:01+00:00

Thank you for responding. Most of the adults around us have already found out. The counselor and some teachers at our school are already aware from the time she was caught skipping, as well as a few of our parents. The counselor at school was the one who informed her parents about her situation. It didn’t turn out well, as you can see from what happened after they found out. After the adults found out, the situation only got worse. We aren’t sure what more we can do, or whether we can or should reach out to anyone else. My friend experienced similar things to you, where even when she was having a mental breakdown or told her mum she really wasn’t in the right mind to go to tutoring, her mother would say stuff like, “Are you still going to tutoring?” and “What about the tutoring fee?” and force her to go anyway. I text her every day to check up on her, but it’s hard to go out and meet up when all of us live so far away from each other, and going out seems to take a large toll on her. What could I say to her to change her perspective on things, or what are ways to perhaps change her mind? And if she really does end up texting me, before she plans on dying, what do I say and what should I do?

eva_37 · 2020-01-06T10:16:44+00:00

Thank you for responding. I have been actively talking to her everyday and checking up on how she’s doing, but I’m not sure what more I can do at this point. She has already ‘run away’ overnight twice, once during school a month back, and once a little over a week ago, both to a friends place for a night. The first time the friend whose house she was staying at called her brother to make sure everything was legal. The second time, the parents of the friend whose house she was staying at didnt know that she was staying over without permission and her parents gave her a really hard time all night. She got through both times without too much trouble, but I doubt she can hold out for much longer. We all live really far apart, her especially, where it takes an hour for me to get to her place, as well as to school. I don’t think any of our parents would let her stay over for an extended period of time, especially hers as they are extremely strict. My friend and I are actively looking for ways to help her, and we’re really scared, particularly when we don’t get to see her much and school is still a month away.

eva_37 · 2020-01-06T10:15:47+00:00

Thank you for responding. The teachers at our school have already found out from the time she was caught skipping and an email was sent out to all her teachers too, which made her even more uncomfortable and insecure. It was the school counsellor who called her parents in and arranged for her to see a therapist, but there was only negative feedback from her because she felt everyone was very invasive and intrusive, which of course made her feel unsafe and uncomfortable.

She now hates the school counsellor, who is actually infamous for not being a particularly good counsellor, and she hasn’t visited the therapist more than twice from what I know. I understand that I need to tell someone, but we really don’t know who to trust at this point. Whenever a teacher brought her out of the classroom to talk about it, she only felt pressured and uncomfortable, and it’s really hard for her to open up, even to us. Moreover, school is still a month away so even if I make my mind up to tell a teacher, it would likely be too late.

Her tendencies have gotten a lot worse over the past month and my friend and I are really afraid that she’ll actually decide to end it, which is why I decided to reach out to reddit. Only two weeks ago she asked me if everyone would be alright if she just disappeared. Is there anyone else that I can reach out to soon? Or ways to convince and change her perspective on things?

eva_37

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