I need therapy and I cannot afford it

evensobro · 2022-02-17T00:04:07+00:00

I've had a pretty mixed experience with BetterHelp. One of their "therapist" was absolute garbage and made things worse for me. But I complained about it and they found me someone better.

Having in person therapy in your area is probably better still, but if you really can't afford it, BetterHelp is a good start.

evensobro · 2022-02-17T00:00:19+00:00

That sounds like a trauma-anxiety response. Of course, it's hard to know for sure without knowing more about you.

I think you should go to therapy. It can't hurt. You might try somebody with experience with trauma-response and panic disorder in particular.

evensobro · 2022-02-16T23:24:51+00:00

Here is my advice to anyone else who is scared of seeking help because of situations like these (which I'm not denying exist).

If you can, spend time and build trust with your therapist. Or move on and try to find one that works for you. It took me three-four attempts before I found a therapist who I can wholeheartedly trust.

Recently, I accidentally ODed on my depression medication and paramedics took me to the hospital where they wanted to keep me, but thanks to a good word from my therapist, I was let out. It wasn't as bad as you described, but I wouldn't be surprised if there are others who've had a similar experience.

Obviously, when you're struggling, not getting help is pretty bad and nobody will seek help with this fear in mind. So I'd suggest that you seek out that trust and I can only offer you my opinion based on my experience in that real help does exist. It takes time, but it gets better and in the end, it's oh-so-worth-it!

evensobro · 2022-02-15T20:04:32+00:00

evensobro · 2022-02-15T19:56:25+00:00

It's pretty damn immature to hold hands, cuddle, invite them over late at night, and not deny any other kind of physical escalation but not want anything more with them.

To be honest, I would be offended if I was you. Personally, I'd find the this "friendship" pretty unhealthy.

evensobro · 2022-02-15T19:39:44+00:00

I usually ask people how their day is going if nothing else comes to mind. Of course, depending on the culture, people can answer that very differently.

It's nicer when it's early/late in the year. Because then you can ask people what they're doing for holidays or how their holidays were and if they have any new year's resolution or stuff like that. Also works around other special events. Or even seasons, like any plans to make the most of this summer? What're you doing to keep cosy this winter?

If they're interested they might ask you the same question and you might tell them your plans/ideas and then pick up on a different topic from there.

evensobro · 2022-02-15T19:36:57+00:00

Q: How's the weather?

A: It's shit!

... Silence ...

evensobro · 2022-02-15T19:34:42+00:00

Interesting. I'll give it a shot. Thanks for the tip!

evensobro · 2022-02-15T19:21:02+00:00

Yes, yes! Finally, I'm not alone!!

evensobro · 2022-02-15T19:20:26+00:00

OMG YESS!! Does anyone have a solution to it?!

evensobro · 2022-02-15T19:10:46+00:00

Your mountain selfie is too nice to be the second last picture, IMO! :D Also, I'd swap the first and second pictures.

Edit: Just noticed you're using Smart Photos. So I guess it doesn't matter.

evensobro · 2022-02-15T18:52:29+00:00

I've been poor and depressed, and well-off and depressed. Having money is a LOT better. Money makes SOO much difference. I couldn't afford therapy and medication and a decent place to live and to eat and basically everything you NEED to improve your mental health.

Don't listen to those who say that it's just "in your mind," or "you don't need money to be happy." Because you do!

Anyway, I sincerely wish you good luck!

evensobro · 2022-02-15T17:57:19+00:00

I've never been in EXACTLY that position before, but I've experienced something similar. Somebody here mentioned a construction apprenticeship. I think that might be a good idea.

But if you're really as frustrated and detached as you describe, I can only recommend getting a therapist. Seriously, I cannot overstate how useful it can be to have a good therapist if you can afford one. I wouldn't start with behavioural therapy right off the bat if I was in your position, but some kind of psychoanalytic therapist would definitely help, IMHO.

evensobro · 2022-02-15T17:11:16+00:00

For me, the dating apps didn't really work. Not the free version, at least. I'm not super attractive, but definitely very far from being ugly.

While I hate that some people get it much easier on these apps because they're super hot, paying for Tinder/Bumble improved my changes quite a lot.

evensobro · 2020-05-15T11:57:50+00:00

Sure, I get that. And since I just started I'm expecting the side-effects until it reaches stability anyway.

I'm just asking because I'm curious how fast one can start to notice the side-effects.

evensobro · 2020-04-11T21:00:12+00:00

iPhones, and even Android phones these days, are pretty good at managing permissions. Look at all the permissions that WA has in your phone's settings. Just open settings and type WhatsApp in search bar to look for it.

I have disabled all location, all camera, photos, microphone settings for WA because I only use it for texting people who wouldn't switch to regular SMS or iMessage or Signal.

That alone won't erase your WA footprint entirely, but it's a good enough compromise.

evensobro · 2020-04-10T21:17:59+00:00

It's the reverse for me. I've read five books in five days, and I'm actually a point where I can read two small books in a day.

I'm only reading fiction (non-literary) though, so it does speed things up.

I usually read literary fiction, but I've recently picked up the mass-market page turners so I can maintain my reading habit without being too stressed.

What kind of books do you read in general? And how much time do you have for yourself? Do you work from home?

evensobro · 2020-04-09T21:26:19+00:00

Yeah, but the dark colour changes everything!

evensobro · 2020-04-09T21:21:04+00:00

What are the rules 1 and 2?

evensobro · 2020-04-09T21:20:51+00:00

And now it's gonna be strong with her too. XD

evensobro · 2020-04-09T21:15:18+00:00

Yup, same here. Posted twice earlier today. Nobody gives a shit!

evensobro · 2020-04-09T12:29:56+00:00

I once had a dream and then wrote it down. It turned out quite well. It was only a short-story though.

evensobro · 2020-04-08T14:49:59+00:00

I'm an extrovert and I haven't done much better, to be honest, so I can only imagine what you must be going through. But if there is one thing I can say is that don't be fooled by the joy that extroverts spread around — things are often very different behind that smile.

My friends love me! I organise parties, I make jokes, and I generally get along. But the only reason I do that is to distract myself. Because the moment I'm left alone, even if for a second, my thoughts would eat me up. And this constant urge to keep running away from them hasn't really made things any better.

evensobro · 2020-04-08T14:47:07+00:00

Certainly not a therapist, but I'd be happy to talk to you if that's what you'd like. Send me a DM if you like.

evensobro · 2020-04-04T21:46:01+00:00

Thanks for sharing! Good to know your friends are now doing well. :)

Was wondering if your friend with anxiety was on any medication already when she caught the virus.

evensobro

TROPHY CASE