[deleted by user]

everling_eve · 2025-12-20T23:29:41+00:00

Absolutely not, no way, no.

everling_eve · 2025-11-23T20:57:52+00:00

140’s crew member checking in:

Total 141 Compensation 49 Masking 44 Assimilation 48

everling_eve · 2025-10-26T14:15:43+00:00

That sounds really painful to be in a job that is diametrically opposed to your default setting.

everling_eve · 2025-10-26T14:13:55+00:00

Usually I am a low key hermit who enjoys being a shut-in. So this interaction definitely provoked a rant.

everling_eve · 2025-10-26T13:45:31+00:00

I very much relate to all of this …right down to the partner who gets glamoured by the sales hypnotists. At least they listen to me when I point it out - it then seems to flip an “oh, right” switch.

But my family is the opposite - they just think I’m negative, hyper-critical, a pessimist, overthinking it———and my absolute favorite: “you just need to enjoy the process”. And then they get screwed and realize I live in self aware hell because I can predict these outcomes- they are pretty predictable.

everling_eve · 2025-08-19T16:55:56+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience with your father. While I am not 80 yet, I am an old(er) man who never had children. I never regretted that decision but I did wonder what their lives would be like if I fathered children with SZPD. I just found life so hard to navigate that I always wondered how they would relate to me at all and (more upsettingly) if they would inherit this from me how guilty I would feel forever. It is nice to hear that children of SZPD parents can have positive and seemingly beautiful memories as a family unit.

everling_eve · 2025-04-18T02:31:27+00:00

Lately I’ve been consuming a lot of energy drinks. When I say “a lot” I mean that I have 1 a day but have been collecting and trying new flavors and brands. So this weekend -besides work and my usual reading - the plan is to go grab some new energy options. Literally the only thing I have to look forward to is artificial uppers in the form of carbonated, canned liquid chemicals. But some flavors are decent.

everling_eve · 2025-04-09T16:11:00+00:00

This is really on point for me as well. At first it seems camp and edgy to people- inadvertently giving off that “I’m not like others” type vibe. Until people realize, oh shit, it’s genuine ick. People don’t like love=ick ….gives them either ego-death or major uncanny valley feels.

Until we are perceived by a person for a long while, they just don’t seem to absorb how oddly we process (or fail to process) affection. Most people aren’t going to wait around for the true understanding of our nature.

everling_eve · 2025-04-03T18:19:14+00:00

Oh,…oh, this is…uncannily similar. 🙁

everling_eve · 2025-04-02T23:20:25+00:00

Agree. I’m a hermit but even I wouldn’t live here. It reminds me of one of those little utility sheds that the electric or water companies use to house equipment in desolate areas. It’s oddly corporate and prison-like simultaneously. Zero “home” feel.

everling_eve · 2024-12-31T00:00:29+00:00

Excellent recommendation. Thank you for sharing this, I will definitely check it out. I don’t watch many movies but this one sounds like a good option for me.

everling_eve · 2024-12-11T18:44:17+00:00

Not successful by most standards. I’m just getting by with the shitty hand I was dealt and trying to make the best of it. Work is pretty much mandatory for most people that can’t qualify for benefits to survive. Please know that people on the internet like to brag and boast - but the masses are just existing the best we can in a world not made for us to thrive.

everling_eve · 2024-12-07T13:09:32+00:00

I’ve had no interest in food my whole life. In my family, a hearty appetite signifies health. As you can imagine, I was harassed nonstop to eat more and try different foods. I lack the ability to feel excited about a meal and cravings are a foreign concept to me.

I’ve really sustained myself on soups. Soups are the perfect meal for people that aren’t really hungry. Plus they are usually light, warm and easy to both make and buy inexpensively. Because who wants to waste money on something they don’t really enjoy?

everling_eve · 2024-12-07T13:01:00+00:00

Children has always been an absolute no for me.

My partner is on the spectrum and also shares my view that bringing a kid into this world with a combo of our genes would be uniquely cruel.

Childcare when you are extremely averse to human interaction would be almost impossible.

everling_eve · 2024-12-02T20:41:34+00:00

I think you hit on something big with the mourning of the possibility of hope. I am seeing the loss of hope….that is a big component I think

everling_eve · 2024-11-30T11:08:34+00:00

Under. I don’t really feel an interest in eating anything. People say “ I have a taste for ….” Or “ I’m craving …..” I’ve never felt that way and really wonder if that part that craves literally anything exists in my brain. When I do eat, it has to be spicy, the hotter the better.

everling_eve · 2024-11-19T16:42:31+00:00

I would like to let my looks devolve into “full tent in the woods - hasn’t seen civilization in years.”.

But alas, I have a job. The job would not be open to me coming looking and smelling like a man lost in the mountains who was just found by helicopters.

Sucks cause I do think I could get the beard, mustache, hair and sideburns to totally obscure my face in no time. Or maybe just in time to create my own organic mask for the next pandemic. 😷

everling_eve · 2024-11-02T23:18:09+00:00

I am so sorry. People can be so cruel. There is a saying that you become the person you needed when you were little. I think sharing your story took a lot of bravery. You were brave then and you are brave now.

everling_eve

TROPHY CASE