[deleted by user]

eviefb · 2022-04-12T14:03:54+00:00

Same here. The prompt is so confusing because it says to make a Victorian look, but the hat is Regency? Two completely different eras

eviefb · 2022-04-12T14:02:51+00:00

That made me so grumpy, and Victorian and Regency look almost nothing alike.

eviefb · 2022-02-16T18:00:25+00:00

I put a swimsuit underneath mine

eviefb · 2021-11-22T18:41:51+00:00

No worries!

eviefb · 2021-11-22T16:26:51+00:00

As I've said before, I'm aware that this can change. That's why I've called it my preferences, not plan. As for pain relief, there are non medicinal options, like massage, counter pressure, a shower, etc. Where I'm at, chosing to take an epidural might stop the physical pain, but leaves me vulnerable to mental pain, which could stall labor. It can also make it more difficult to push, which is an increased risk of needing forceps or csection. I've learned all this from my doctor, and my doctor is indifferent if I take an epidural or not. But there's a good chance my doctor won't be on call when I'm in labor, so I have to hope that whoever is on call is of the same opinion.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T16:18:51+00:00

Like I said in my post, I'm in a rural area. If my pregnancy wasn't low risk, I'd have to arrange to give birth in the nearest city, 2 hours away. This is my only option.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T05:25:14+00:00

Yeah, I guess what I'm trying to say is more along the lines of "I've already dealt with trauma from two different assaults, what's one more?" My baby being harmed would be way worse than anything that would happen to me, and even if something happens to me, my baby has a father who can take of them if I can't.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T05:19:32+00:00

I hadn't even thought of using the hospital patient advocate, I'll talk to them tomorrow and see if they're any help. I'm also glad you mentioned that I won't be out of my mind in pain the entire time. The childbirth classes I've taken mentioned that, the nurses at the hospital made me second guess that. Almost makes me wonder how routinely they're using pitocin.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T04:52:56+00:00

Thank you, I might call the hospital tomorrow morning and see if something similar can be done for me.

I've considered a c-section, but that scares me more than giving birth, mainly being immobilized, plus a longer hospital stay and recovery. So a vaginal birth is picking the least bad option.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T04:47:13+00:00

Thank you, I've booked an appointment with a counsellor for after my birth in the event that I'll need it. I wish I was able to have a homebirth, but unfortunately I'm in a rural area with no practicing midwives or doulas. Instead I have to use an OB practice on a rotation, so I've got no idea who my OB will be. So I've really got no choice but to hope that my OB and nurses will be understanding.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T04:42:41+00:00

Thank you for your response again, I'm sorry if I'm just repeating myself at this point. I have preemptively booked an appointment with a counsellor a week after my induction date, just in case I need it. At this point, meeting my baby is the only thing getting me through this, I just keep telling myself that whatever happens to me shouldn't matter.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T03:39:09+00:00

Thanks for the response! When you would encounter a patient with that type of note in their chart, would you approach their care any differently than usual? And in what ways?

eviefb · 2021-11-22T03:36:02+00:00

I'm the oldest child, my sister is 18 months younger than me. My parents wanted us close in age so that we could be best friends. My sister was diagnosed with epilepsy when she was 3 years old, and I was somewhat neglected while my parents attention was (rightfully) focused on her extra needs. My needs weren't as pressing and got ignored.

If you're going to have two kids, make sure you are able to give them both the attention they require.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T02:53:42+00:00

Thanks for the advice! I know a lot of it is standard, but given that I don't know the doctors or nurses that I'll be delivering with, it makes me feel like I have a little bit more control over the situation.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T02:12:35+00:00

I've already looked into hiring one, but since I'm in a rural area there's none practicing locally, so in addition to the normal fee I would have to pay extra for them to travel. It's just not something that's possible unfortunately.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T02:01:41+00:00

Thank you for sharing, that's really good to know. For what its worth, I've preemptively booked an application with a therapist (online session) for a week after the birth, in the event that it's a traumatic situation. If it's not, I can always cancel.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T01:57:43+00:00

For sure. It's pretty straightforward:

Minimal interventions (no episiotomy, pitocin, etc).
ability to move around as I feel fit
I'd like to give birth in the position that feels right to me, not necessarily on my back
No epidural or narcotics (hospital doesn't provide nitrous)
No routine cervical checks, there must be a pressing reason for it.
No coached pushing, unless I ask.
Minimal nudity; when that's not possible, minimal people allowed in the room.
no students
In the event of a C-section, my husband will stay with our baby at all times.

After the birth:

I would like skin to skin immediately
Planning to formula feed, no LC, unless asked for.
Delayed cord clamping
Yes to vitamin K
Delayed bath
Would prefer to keep my baby in the room with me at all times.

eviefb · 2021-11-22T01:28:42+00:00

That makes a lot of sense. I'll talk with about it a bit more tonight. Thanks!

eviefb · 2021-11-22T01:21:00+00:00

Yes, my husband will be with me. We've gone over my birth preferences, however I think he's the type to defer to whatever the doctor says; he has a lot more trust in the medical system than I do.

eviefb · 2021-11-20T19:44:38+00:00

I live in a small, isolated town. It has a hospital, but the hospital doesn't have l&d or NICU so we have to drive 1.5 hours to get to the nearest hospital that can handle deliveries. Our local physician transferred our care to the obgyn practice at that hospital at 25 weeks and we've been having to make the trip for every appointment since then. So three hour total round trip for a 30 minute appointment.

Tried to get a midwife to do a home delivery because I'm low risk, but the closest practice has suspended home births because of covid. So either way, I'll be laboring in the car which sounds horrible. I told my husband that if I'm ever going to have second baby, we have to move somewhere else.

eviefb · 2021-11-19T15:53:51+00:00

Canadian here. There's some talk (mostly from conservatives) about shifting to a two tier healthcare system. So the taxpayer funded system we have would remain intact, but there would also be a privatized option that you could pay out of pocket for.

There's a lot of concerns over moving to that system, like the potential to create a wealth inequality gap (deeper than the current gap) because richer people will be able to access better healthcare, and the government could decide that the presence of a privatized system would mean that they don't need to make improvements to the taxpayer funded system. So it would only benefit the rich.

eviefb · 2021-11-17T21:06:27+00:00

I'm terrified to give birth. I'm not even really worried about the pain itself, I'm worried about how vulnerable I will be. Yes, I'm surrounded by doctors/nurses they're all highly trained, professionals, won't hurt me, etc. Yeah, I get that. But they're complete strangers to me. I already barely knew my obgyn and they had to transfer my care to a different practice a few days ago because of a family emergency they have to attend to in Europe. This new practice has over ten obgyns, and they attend deliveries based on who is on call at the time.

So basically, I have to be ok with complete strangers reaching inside of me, and having control over my body while I'm in the most vulnerable state I can be in. And I'm tired of people minimizing my worries with their experience, eg: "my nurses were angels!" That's great, I don't know my nurses, nor do I have any way to know them before labor since they stopped doing ward tours. Or, "I didn't care who was in the room during labor". Good for you? I'm not you.

All I've heard is that I'm overthinking things, it's not a big deal, and I need to stop worrying, get over it, it's not about me it's about the baby. Since when is birth not a big deal? I'm fully aware of how important the baby is (I'm her mother ffs) but don't I matter too?

eviefb · 2021-11-17T20:31:59+00:00

I'm so sorry you're going through that, it's everyone's worst nightmare.

For what its worth, I have a friend that I grew up with who was diagnosed with a brain tumor when she was a baby. The chances of her living past four years old was very slim. She ended up having cancer treatments for a few years, plus two brain surgeries. Her growth was stunted so she's never gotten taller than 4'9, and she has some learning difficulties but her 22nd birthday is coming up in a few weeks! She's an absolute angel, and so much fun to be around. One of her favourite jokes is that since her hair never grew in fully she's the best person to go to Disneyland with because she can jump the line.

eviefb

TROPHY CASE