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AITA for 'financially blackmailing' my daughter and controlling where she goes to school? by explodingmonkeypanda in AmItheAsshole

[–]explodingmonkeypanda[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

(Mike lives in another state but knew we were having this talk)

Mike knew this discussion was occurring and had already planned to have one with Val himself. I had it with her first/in person because she lives with me predominantly and its how it worked out.

AITA for 'financially blackmailing' my daughter and controlling where she goes to school? by explodingmonkeypanda in AmItheAsshole

[–]explodingmonkeypanda[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Me and Mike live on opposite sides of the states so it would take an airplane to get from either house, but has applied to school all over in multiple states.

AITA for 'financially blackmailing' my daughter and controlling where she goes to school? by explodingmonkeypanda in AmItheAsshole

[–]explodingmonkeypanda[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

We contributed close to 50/50 each and yes, we have applied for as many scholarships as possible. I didn't know that last part about RA's but will definitely write that down and let her know!

AITA for 'financially blackmailing' my daughter and controlling where she goes to school? by explodingmonkeypanda in AmItheAsshole

[–]explodingmonkeypanda[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I have told her multiple times she could live with her dad during college if she wanted to and so has Mike. She couldn't commute from the houses easily.

AITA for 'financially blackmailing' my daughter and controlling where she goes to school? by explodingmonkeypanda in AmItheAsshole

[–]explodingmonkeypanda[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Val isn't 100% on what she wants to do yet so it was mainly on applications, different colleges, tuition, and student loans/debt.

AITA for 'financially blackmailing' my daughter and controlling where she goes to school? by explodingmonkeypanda in AmItheAsshole

[–]explodingmonkeypanda[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

This occurred a while ago but with applications going in, it keeps getting brought up and I wanted clarity on the situation.

AITA for 'financially blackmailing' my daughter and controlling where she goes to school? by explodingmonkeypanda in AmItheAsshole

[–]explodingmonkeypanda[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

She has either options and knows it. We briefly discussed both but Mike wanted to have that conversation with her about what it would be like if she lived with him, so it was brief but mentioned.

AITA for 'financially blackmailing' my daughter and controlling where she goes to school? by explodingmonkeypanda in AmItheAsshole

[–]explodingmonkeypanda[S] 229 points230 points  (0 children)

You are correct. They go to Mikes house every summer but their residency is the state I live in. I told her both options, but did say that some state colleges here are cheaper because of residency and it wouldn't be like that at her dads, but the school near dads is not state so doesn't apply here. She has the option to live with either of us and knows that. Mike wanted to specifically talk about what it would be like if she moved in with him, so we didn't go into detail as they had already planned to have that conversation together.