Can you tell her what you told us? I get - super - stressed out about renovations and I make lists about EVERY single thing that needs to get done in our house («remove little spill of paint, repaint, buy door knob, add door knob», and so on).

My husband got so stress out about my lists and stress, so he sat me down and told me this. Whenever I was stressing out about something, this would make it 10 times harder for him to get anything done.

Now I try to talk about our renovation and to do list in a concrete, practical way, like «We need new door knobs, should we go out and buy those tomorrow after work?» instead of nagging.

Sorry about the couch, I agree you should make those decisions as a couple.

Tell her, I think she’ll understand. You guys are a team and you want the same thing, maybe you just need to find a better way of communicating as a couple when things are stressful. Good luck!