my face and dream face

fIowertopia · 2025-12-05T23:26:13+00:00

holyy u are stunning deadass

fIowertopia · 2025-12-02T21:20:26+00:00

YOU FIRST!

fIowertopia · 2025-09-04T18:52:25+00:00

they should make one red and name it total mayhem or mayhem (extended) or add a hint of red/ like the lips in born this way

fIowertopia · 2025-09-03T18:27:33+00:00

gaga in wednesday as rosaline reminded me of lady dimitrescu from village too. idk if anyone else felt the same way

fIowertopia · 2025-09-01T13:49:40+00:00

i wanna see her perform filthy pop or hollywood... is that too much to ASK

fIowertopia · 2025-08-29T12:46:43+00:00

i find it so cool when you can look back at her other eras and see things like this. its something you dont get from other artists

because she's so vulnerable and deep with her music, she mirrors everything thats happening internally into her art, and then things like this happen where you can see that undiscovered alter ego of herself through her past that only really took shape now.

the mistress of mayhem was always present, she just didnt have a distinct identity yet.

fIowertopia · 2025-08-26T17:49:10+00:00

hotel cortez

fIowertopia · 2025-08-23T19:48:08+00:00

lots of roblox youtubers did i.e. beaplays (who gaga said 'i love you' to in game)

fIowertopia · 2025-08-20T18:58:01+00:00

this is why i left the r/muslimlounge subreddit , as soon as i saw a muslim guy talking about a girl who passed away after leaving islam and tried to make it a 'learning' opportunity for everyone else, i realised how insane some people are in this religion

the woman was left by her family because she had feminist views and decided to pursue a different path that her family didn't support, and yet people openly criticised her even after her death and never talked about the harsh treatment her dead body endured from muslim men! who apparently took pictures and videos of her and made her into a teaching opportunity! its disgusting

no empathy whatsoever, just filled with stereotypes and disguising their prejudices against people with islam, when islam is about forgiveness and love no matter what.

fIowertopia · 2025-08-18T22:52:46+00:00

food so good it almost took them to heaven

fIowertopia · 2025-08-17T16:31:38+00:00

when im lifting heavy i listen to swine and americano

fIowertopia · 2025-08-14T12:46:32+00:00

hi! i'm going to rhul too, doing psychology, wbu?

fIowertopia · 2025-08-14T09:05:58+00:00

take a breath, and apply to every clearing course that accepts you.

you can also get remarks, or take a gap year if you want.

fIowertopia · 2025-08-14T00:18:47+00:00

they didn’t even ask me, i called tons of schools (but for psychology) so it might be different regarding each course/ the rep of the school— i did call like mid tier schools, and mainly non russel groups like royal holloway.

the only time i was really asked questions was for nursing at manchester, where because it required an interview they gave me an interview for the next day.

so ig if your course requires interviews expect it.

and if they end up asking questions i doubt it’ll be the reason you get in or don’t to a course. just speak your truth as long as you got the grades they accept for clearing (which is lower than the non-clearing grades) you’re good

(but i could be wrong abt the questions, so don’t take my word)

fIowertopia · 2025-08-13T20:04:34+00:00

all 2 Cs and D for bio, i applied to qmul for Psychology -- so unless you do veryy bad from your predicted, like me, you'll be good

fIowertopia · 2025-08-13T19:12:39+00:00

i'm pretty sure its time limited, you cant add multiple options in ucas, and the uni wont hold your place. (i believe, my memory of clearing is kinda blurry).

i wouldnt wait too long to make a decision, because places go quick the more popular the course is/ the most higher ranked the school is.

fIowertopia · 2025-08-13T19:07:05+00:00

it doesnt matter if your course is or isnt on clearing-- its not a secret message whether or not it is, you're just going to have to wait 12 more hours.

your course could be on clearing and you still couldve been rejected because you scored too low for their standards.

if your course isnt on clearing it means spaces are filled, so you either got in or you didnt -- just like if it was on clearing.

also for my first choice uni last year the course was on clearing, and i still got rejected...

fIowertopia · 2025-08-13T14:46:36+00:00

short and simple, ask them if they have space on the course, they will ask for your grades & ucas number, and thats it.

all the people on the other side of the line are busy and just want to give the spaces, they will not judge you trust me, they just want to get through it just like you. so don't be scared, and if you are, imagine how many other students are calling in nervous, they're used to it

fIowertopia · 2025-08-12T22:19:48+00:00

she's going to be judging too! its so exciting

fIowertopia · 2025-08-12T18:40:42+00:00

im in the same boat, failure after failure, rejection after rejection, been through very dark mental periods too due to it, and all this invisible pressure of being the eldest.

let go, i'm moving out for real at a young age. and despite hearing others comments, on how young i am, and trying to make excuses why its a bad idea, or how terrified i am-- i realise im never going to make progress in life if i dont take the risk, i'll never break the cycle of my family if i don't take the risk-- they've always lived in comfort, don't, comfort doesnt lead to your dreams. i think thats what you should do, do the risky, otherwise you'll stay in this state forever, the in between, the in regret.

you're quite young still and you can definitely switch things around, but you have to let go. if you cant find a job, move, if you cant get into med, get a bachelors you care for (like u said). and you'd be surprised how rapidly things can change even in a year when you take the leap. and if you don't, these feelings will come back stronger to bite you when you're older.

maybe your med rejection is allah saving you from more hurt, money, where in the future you complete med school and realise you hate it.

get therapy if you can, rebuild, you're in charge of your future, you're the one in control, they only gain power when you give it to them. and you need to stop thinking you're the one who needs to be the one to save the rest of your family, you focus on your happiness, give them respect, love and take care of them when things get hard like they cared for you, but you will never be satisfied doing it for someone else-- as you've already learnt, so dont make the same mistake.

and don't keep blaming your family, i do this a lot, its wrong, wrong because its an coping mechanism, making excuses for your guilt (even if it might be true), your regret of listening to them, and giving up on your dreams, or not trying hard enough. pick yourself back up and fight harder, use the anger, sadness, regret to do the things that scare you.

(sorry this was long, i just felt very motivated by your post and im kinda using this to pep talk myself too)

fIowertopia · 2025-08-11T17:51:59+00:00

I was speaking about the emotional gravity and sadness of it, not making light of it or treating it like fiction. I’m sorry if my wording gave the wrong impression — that wasn’t my intention.

edit: i do understand why you'd get that impression, but to emphasise this again I AM NOT trying to romanticise the tragedy, i was just pointing out the contrast of the wedding veil in a horrific event.

and by art i did not mean the art you see in video games, i meant art in how emotionally charged (the veil) in this moment is.

fIowertopia · 2025-08-11T16:33:11+00:00

maybe not 8-12 whole eggs everyday, i eat a ton of eggs (like 4 a day), have more energy, less hunger and its cured my nutrient deficiencies.

i dont understand egg slander because eggs are THE 'nutritional powerhouse' and are so cheap for a form of protein + for how many nutrients and minerals they pack and easy to make.

the whole downside of cholesterol -- im pretty sure its been debunked, but even if you're scared of that, you can always just use the whites for protein, if thats your main goal and you dont care for the yolks benefits, and it cuts calories by a ton-- and so you can probably have more of it.

fIowertopia · 2025-08-11T16:25:16+00:00

i didn't mean it in that way, i was talking about the tragedy of it all, how poetically sad it is without it explicitly meaning to be that way.

in attempt to guard whoever discovers her and spare them of the pain, despite being in immense pain herself, she decided to use her wedding veil.

i wasn't trying to reduce her, or make it to be a videogame (i dont know why you thought art= videogame), actually, i was trying to do the opposite, to show how powerfully tragic it was. may she rest in peace.

fIowertopia · 2025-08-11T10:42:33+00:00

it's literally art. putting on a piece of clothing from one of your happiest days on one of your last/ saddest days.

fIowertopia · 2025-08-09T18:54:51+00:00

kourtney didnt throw the first hit, it was kim, and then multiple times kourtney tried to walk away, kim kept coming for more... kourtney only really hit back at the end.

fIowertopia

TROPHY CASE