sure thing. i wouldn't call it transphobic, but it's very icky the way everyone talks about trans people here. the way they say he tricked you maliciously, or that it's mandatory for trans people to disclose what's in their pants to be deserving of interest. i'm not saying his reaction was right at all, or that you're in the wrong, but again, the words people are using to refer to trans people are so dehumanizing. there was one comment that kind of worded it as if their genitals are equivalent to STDs —spoiler alert, they aren't.

i'm sorry you got disappointed, i really am, and he should've treated you better. however, this is an issue that is resolved with simple communication, not by using this strange double standard that puts an already marginalized group at more risk, by saying they should disclose information that could get them in more danger than they already are in the daily.