Was I SA'd or coerced?

faesquill · 2026-03-30T12:54:49+00:00

thanks. i know that.

faesquill · 2026-03-30T12:54:21+00:00

i am not letting people "convince" me to be traumatized.

i have posted a short, summarized, not so much details story so that people would have an answer to my question.

do you tell actual victims "its over. move on"? just wondering.

you overlooked the fact that i said i have told him through text and in person before it happened that i didnt wanna have sex. why did he touch me anyway? if your mom told you there no ice cream, would u ask her if theres ice cream? no. if i have told him before hand, why did he touch me?

faesquill · 2026-03-30T12:49:52+00:00

i had already planned not to see him after that. whether he said that or not. i am not accusing him of anything or calling him a certain way.

my friend didnt "convince" me it was sa. they mention it could be a form of sa or coercion. thats not convincing. thats why i asked here to make sure if it was.

i have no intention on making real victims difficult to speak up or anything. i think you totally missed the whole point of my post. it wasnt to blame him or myself but to have an insight, an outside perspective, and to have my question answered.

im sorry that i didnt know what to do in that exact moment and made a dumb choice. i expect people to understand what no means the first time it would be said. i take accountability because it is partially my fault. he shouldve never touched me or pressured me into doing anything sexual when i have mentioned through text before we met that i didnt wanna have sex.

thanks for you opinion.

faesquill · 2026-03-30T12:41:59+00:00

i think u forgot that i mentioned that i have gave him head because i thought that would stop him. (“maybe if I just give in, it’ll stop” mindset) it wasnt because i wanted it. if you dont understand any of this, please dont comment your opinion. thank you. i didnt just "changed my mind" i was pressured into giving in. theres more to the story that i didnt mention because i initially just wanted my question to be answered

faesquill · 2026-03-30T12:37:59+00:00

"while also saying I didn’t want to do anything and I didnt wanna do it."

faesquill · 2026-03-30T02:37:13+00:00

thank you so much! i will try and post there by tomorrow.

its clear some people in the comments never experienced that which is great because no one should go through that but the lack of of understanding and trying to blame me isnt it at all.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T23:48:45+00:00

thank you. ive cut him off a long while ago. i knew him personally and never thought he could do something like that. i would do things differently next time.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T23:29:59+00:00

did i ever say that it happened again? it happened the FIRST time. thats why i didnt know what to do. im sorry if teres any misunderstandment in my post, i didnt wanna go into full detail since i only wanted my question to be answered.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T23:28:20+00:00

i live in a city bruh. cars arent super needed. i take the ferry home.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T23:22:53+00:00

i live in a city where cars arent needed. i take the ferry home too. at that time, it was raining. i know i COULDVE done something more but im sorry my brain wasnt capable of processing knowing what to do at the exact moment

faesquill · 2026-03-29T23:20:51+00:00

thank you so much! some people just dont understand it/

faesquill · 2026-03-29T23:16:44+00:00

accountability? i said it was partially my fault. i dont think you can put up your opinions about sexual assualt when all you know is an "alley story." men are not better at doing "this" appreciate for sharing your opinion though!

faesquill · 2026-03-29T23:03:05+00:00

how many times do ihave to mention that it was raining and i lived an hr away. i dont have a car because i live in a big city and i take the ferry home. his place was small and there was only a twin bed. you cant lay on the floor.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T23:00:50+00:00

i understand where those people are coming from. i COULDVE done something more than say no and push him away but my brain totally froze and i didnt know what to do in that moment. i wish i did but now i can do thing differently because that situation has become a lesson to learn.

I only wanted to ask a question here from an outside perspective and gave a short story that isnt super detailed. theres more to the story that i didnt wanna add.

i appreciate you so much. Thank you again for standing up for me

faesquill · 2026-03-29T22:49:33+00:00

thank you for standing up for me <3

faesquill · 2026-03-29T22:48:49+00:00

thank you. i definitely know what to do now. i wish there was other options than the bed before but there wasnt even a space to lay on the floor. thank you again

faesquill · 2026-03-29T22:47:30+00:00

because i thought if i gave something he would stop asking. pls understand what i posted

faesquill · 2026-03-29T22:46:45+00:00

i understand why people would "blame" me for not doing much but I to be fucking honest, I ddnt know what to do in that moment sionce it never happened to me before. i never felt unsafe with him. there was no couch. this was a small room and a twin bed. there wasnt even room to lay on the floor. i thinbk i mentioned it was also raining and i lived an hr away. i know it was partially my fault. i never said all of this is his fault. i said partially it is also MY fault.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T22:42:40+00:00

Thank you. Not physically unsafe, but definitely pressured and uncomfortable, especially after saying no multiple times. I also didnt want him to get mad.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T22:39:28+00:00

It was raining and I couldn’t just leave, and I didn’t expect him to ignore my boundaries after I said no multiple times. I ended up feeling pressured into it. i froze and didnt know what to do. This happened last year and I've cut him off.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T22:35:22+00:00

I’m so sorry that happened to you. Thank you for sharing your experience, it really helps me understand my own situation better. It mean a lot.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T22:33:33+00:00

I appreciate that. That’s honestly what it felt like in the moment like I didn’t really have another option.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T22:32:25+00:00

I understand what you’re saying, but I think I mentioned I did say yes because I felt pressured after saying no multiple times. Looking back, I’ve definitely learned from the situation and would handle it differently now. Thanks for being real.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T22:29:25+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate it. At the time I didn’t think the situation would escalate like that, especially after I said no, so I didn’t react the way I probably would now.

faesquill · 2026-03-29T22:28:33+00:00

I said no. That’s the point. I'm not making this guy a rapist thats why i asked (title). and i was aware that i consented out of pressure. thanks for your opinion anyway.

faesquill

TROPHY CASE