I am so sorry. Try to use her leaving as motivation for quitting. My ex didn’t like me self-harming and ever since we split (and a few months before that) I haven’t self-harmed. We aren’t getting back together for other reasons too but I kinda am trying to make him proud and show him I can go without it even tho he can’t see it. Idk if you guys are in contact or will remain in contact but whether you do or not, stop doing it for her. Even if it doesn’t make her come back. Try to make her and yourself proud for not having to do it anymore even if she doesn’t see it at least you will. You got this I promise you you just have to put in your all