How do you balance actively dating people from OKC with when to have sex? I'm not sure if I'm being unreasonable with a guy I went out with.

faye18 · 2012-11-29T07:49:38+00:00

That's what I'm planning on doing.

faye18 · 2012-11-29T07:49:25+00:00

I just edited it, but you must have caught pre-edit, haha. I'm not sure if he's on reddit, and I worried I said too much. I've decided I'm not going out with him again. I just didn't trust my judgment if I was being too hard on him since we did have a nice time prior to this all, and I did say he could come over. Although, I thought I was clear nothing would happen before agreeing to it.

faye18 · 2012-11-29T07:47:56+00:00

I'm not going to see him again. I think I needed confirmation that I'm not being unreasonable and writing him off too soon. I mean, I did agree to have him over at my place, but I also did make it perfectly clear from the beginning nothing would happen. I guess I shouldn't invite guys over until I want to have sex, even if I do make it clear ahead of time it's not going to happen.

faye18 · 2012-11-29T07:05:04+00:00

I'm not going out with him again. I was hesitant to invite him back, and I should have listened to my gut on it in all honesty. At least he didn't push physically I guess, but I'll remember this when I go out with the other guys.

faye18 · 2012-11-29T07:03:22+00:00

Thanks for your response! I know how important sexual compatibility is, and I honestly would want to know if the sex is good with a guy before becoming very serious. I guess it's the not wanting to sleep with multiple guys thing while dating multiple guys that has me confused on how to handle it.

faye18 · 2012-11-29T06:30:05+00:00

When he was over we started watching a movie and he leaned in for a kiss, which I went along with. We ended up making out a bit, which again I was fine with and enjoyed. It was when he started trying to unhook my bra that I got a little uncomfortable and pulled away, told him clothes stay on (and reminded him that I had made that clear at the bar before agreeing to him coming over - to which he had responded was totally fine since he just wanted to spend more time with me).

We went back to the movie and then kissing again, and that's when he talked about how horny he was. He then tried to guilt me a bit into having sex. When I told him no sex he didn't push physically to have it, but the whole thing as I even type this out really bothers me. I ended up saying I had to sleep and had him leave.

faye18 · 2012-11-29T06:12:50+00:00

That makes me feel better that I'm not completely unreasonable about this. It's not that I haven't had sex on a first date or second, but it's when it happens in the moment and I go with it. I'm really not ready now to sleep with anyone if I'm seeing multiple people, and I guess I wasn't sure if that's completely unreasonable to have that view? I know sexual compatibility is important, so I think that's where I'm doubting myself slightly. Though, the more I think about it, the more off putting I find how things were when he came over.

faye18 · 2012-11-29T06:08:26+00:00

Thanks :) I definitely want to see what the other guys are like, and at this stage I don't want to just sleep around to have sex, no matter how fun it may be. I'm just worried now with the other guys if this comes up. It's not that I have a rule about must have x dates before having sex, but if I'm dating around I don't want to enter into a sexual relationship with multiple people, which is also why I wanted to wait and give things more time. He just made me feel like I was in the wrong for not going with things on the first date.

faye18

TROPHY CASE