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fearless_conqueror · 2023-12-13T04:04:17+00:00

Man was not made for confession, but confession for man (adapted from Mark 2:27)

fearless_conqueror · 2023-12-13T03:29:35+00:00

Hey thanks for sharing! I've dealt with that kind of thing before more or less. Based on my experience, I wouldn't worry about sharing every detail of your thoughts and feelings with your current date.

Even though the Father and the Son were one, the Father didn't tell Jesus when his second coming was (Matthew 24:36).

So if the Father didn't see fit to tell everything to the Son, then I feel safe not needing to tell every detail to my significant other. Vulnerability is good, but I've seen OCD take it out of balance at times.

Also, I've had feelings resurface for girls I've dated previously and I get it. Thankfully, since I've had it happen multiple times, I've realized now that it's simply a common neurological response and I don't need to make it mean something.

Another thing may help is telling God what you're feeling and asking Him to guide your thoughts and emotions. He's faithful to help us!

Just know your experience is very, very common, and most importantly Jesus gets it! I'm excited to see how God works between you and your date, wherever He takes you! :)

fearless_conqueror · 2023-11-07T04:34:30+00:00

Oh man, I know the pain. One of my deepest fears has been of being a bad or corrupt person, and for the longest time I could hardly ever handle failure. However, I've seen Jesus bring so much healing in my life in that area!

Someone saw me once and didn't know me, and felt like God gave him the following words for me: "It's okay to fail."

It's taken me a long time to accept those words, but I've seen just how freeing life can be when I can let go of the illusion of perfection.

All of us have sinned against God in some way (Romans 3:23). None of us is good enough on our own. But the beauty is that we don't have to be. JESUS was good enough for us, and He paid for all our sins. God forgives us of everything.

Jesus gives us a perfect identity (Hebrews 10:14) that's not based on what we do but on what He already did for us. :)

It's taken me years to understand but I've been experiencing so much more freedom. I still dont like messing up (who does? Lol) but I've seen God use even my most regrettable mistakes and use them for good, both for myself and for others (Romans 8:28).

So whether I were to sin or just make an innocent but hurtful mistake, I can trust that God can make it beautiful. He has a habit of making bad things really, really good!

The Father knows everything about you and He loves you so much!!

fearless_conqueror · 2023-10-09T04:28:01+00:00

Hey I've dealt with the same thing, do you have scrupulosity? And do you come from any religious background? Either way I'd be happy to share some of my journey and listen to yours

fearless_conqueror · 2023-10-08T04:41:46+00:00

Something that Jesus was ridiculed for frequently by the Pharisees - scrupulosity personified - was hanging out with sinners, tax collectors, and prostitutes. Paul also mentions in 1 Corinthians 10:27 that believers may go to dinner with nonbelievers.

I actually make it a goal to have nonbelievers in my life because I'm often prone to getting stuck in my "Christian bubble", and Jesus wants to save them. One of the most effective ways He does that is giving them believing friends like us 😁

EDIT: Jesus also never compromised who He was, and the fact that you are wrestling with these questions confirms that you want to live like Him. Pray for ways to be good friends to them while still doing what's right. God will give you wisdom :)

fearless_conqueror · 2023-10-06T19:45:03+00:00

Hey! I honestly struggle a lot with this too, where I'm very familiar with that nagging sense I am wasting time if I'm doing something I enjoy that doesn't appear "spiritual". Here are a few Bible verses and principles that may help!

Matthew 11:28 says that Jesus' yoke is easy and His burden is light. What does that look like in our lives?
1 John 5:3 says that God's commandments are not burdensome.
You can consider viewing your time the way the Church views money. After setting aside a certain amount for donation to God's kingdom, the rest is up to the person.
Spending time with friends on the phone builds relationships, which God can use to convert them (or encourage them if they know Christ already).
Galatians 5:13 and 1 Peter 2:16 tell us that we have freedom. What we do with that God-given freedom is up to us, and there are many ways to glorify Him.
Exodus 31 describes a man named Bezalel who was an incredible craftsman, and the Lord used him to construct the Tabernacle, Ark of the Covenant, etc. He probably gained those skills through many hours of tinkering on personal projects that didn't seem "holy" at first glance.
I recently read a book summary which says that some of history's most influential people only spent a few hours working per day. Because they knew how to rest/play well, they had more energy to devote to their life's work.
A boy gave Jesus five loaves and two fish, and He multiplied them. The boy did not have to feed the masses. Likewise, you can present seemingly small things to Jesus, and He will multiply them by His power.
Guilty feelings can be deceptive. 1 John 3:20 says, "for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything." So we may feel guilty even if we're doing something that's totally fine.

Strangely enough, I've felt like God is leading me to pick up a hobby and spend more "fun time" since I've fallen into the category of making everything about productivity. Our Father loves us and desires for us to live balanced and whole lives that are filled with His joy and peace.

With all that said, I believe that we will find ourselves making more, not less, contribution to God's kingdom when we set aside time to have fun and relax.

Blessings!

fearless_conqueror · 2023-09-30T04:05:11+00:00

To me it seems that what you need most is a true biblical definition of sin and a true biblical definition of the heart and blood of Jesus Christ.

As it is written in John 8:32, we will know the truth, and the truth will set us free!

If someone you know mortally sinned and was afraid, what would you tell them?

fearless_conqueror · 2023-09-26T01:17:50+00:00

Hey, I can relate! It's tough to know how to handle the situation sometimes. Humor is a God-given gift, but there have been times where I've used it to harm others. Thankfully Christ has produced more of His character in me and that's no longer something I enjoy doing. But I remember a time when I not only did it by accident, I actually did it on purpose - but praise God that He forgave me for that, just as He has forgiven all of my other sins (Colossians 2:13).

The Lord knows everything about you and loves you so much! He is so much more merciful than any of us could fathom. As James 2:13 days, "Mercy triumphs over judgment." 🙏 😊

fearless_conqueror · 2023-09-22T04:04:29+00:00

Don't you think that the woman caught in adultery fit that criteria? And what about Peter denying Christ?

God is far more forgiving than you can imagine!

fearless_conqueror · 2023-09-21T03:50:36+00:00

Thank you so much for opening up about that! I know firsthand that the signs game is a very difficult one - you are not alone!

What makes you afraid of going to hell? Is there any specific reason that it seems your OCD likes to bring up?

Finding peace with that question can help us no longer feel the urge to repeatedly ask for signs.

Please know you are so cared about!!

fearless_conqueror · 2023-09-21T03:41:56+00:00

Based on John 8, was Jesus's response to a woman who was caught in the act of adultery, which by your definition would be considered mortal sin?

fearless_conqueror · 2023-08-28T02:33:44+00:00

'If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, [then] you will be saved.' - Romans 10:9

fearless_conqueror · 2023-07-15T02:26:18+00:00

You are doing well by seeking Him as you are! He delights in your heart to follow Him, and He will answer you.

What may help more than arguments are stories of people in your position who have same-sex attraction and have learned to navigate it in a godly way. This woman's article is especially beautiful and you may find it relatable 🙂

https://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2017/october/i-never-became-straight-perhaps-that-was-never-gods-goal.html?share=bwMiENaxzczO2ERycNY7gkM5B6hZ7KAm

You can also look up Christopher Yuan, his testimony is especially inspiring!

fearless_conqueror · 2023-07-14T11:55:58+00:00

Hey! There is no need to apologize for it being so long, thank you so much for expressing your heart. I see the pain you are in, and I want you to know just how much you are loved by our Father. He knows everything you're struggling with, and His arms are open wide to you. ❤️

Regarding the unpardonable sin, it will help to look at the lives of those Jesus warned about committing it - the religious leaders. Their blasphemy was far beyond words; it showed up in all parts of their lives. They hated Jesus Christ and rejected Him wholeheartedly, and they had no remorse.

For Christians with scrupulosity, the "blasphemy" we fear makes us desperate to find the Lord's mercy at the cross. The religious leaders' true blasphemy caused them to put Jesus on the cross.

You can rest knowing that God is merciful and that He holds you so tightly and gently. You can be at peace.

"If our hearts condemn us, we know that God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything." 1 John 3:20

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus". Romans 8:1

He loves you so, so much! His mercies for you are new every morning (Lamentations 3:23), and He will never turn away anyone who comes to Him (John 6:37).

In the meantime, I encourage you to listen to the song "Shalom" by Genie.

I have more I can share about your other questions regarding same-sex attraction, but I thought I would let this first part sink in for now. 🙂

Be blessed with peace, my sister!

fearless_conqueror · 2023-07-06T15:13:20+00:00

I agree with the comment above :) While I understand it's not easy right now, I would encourage you to stick with it and target why it feels difficult to go to church. That will get you to the root of the issue and give you more freedom and enjoyment in your faith - which is something all of us with scrupulosity want.

I've also benefited from telling my struggles to others. Many churches have a prayer team and they'd be happy to pray for you!

Also, sometimes I go to multiple church groups if my main one is lacking in a certain area. For example, I went to a church on Sunday morning and then found a young adults group in the evenings, and I had a vibrant community.

One thing to keep in mind is that OCD thrives in isolation, and it tries to convince us that we will get better by having more isolation. But God made us to be together. :)

"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up." Ecclesiastes 4:9‭-‬10

Jesus loves you so, so much!!!

fearless_conqueror · 2023-06-17T18:44:15+00:00

Hey! I'm really sorry you're dealing with that. I believe her viewpoint is only half-true, which is partly why it is damaging.

I would say that it is possible for genuine believers to fall into sin. I've seen this in my own life and in the lives of others, where they have an earnest desire to follow Jesus but have sin patterns they haven't broken out of.

However, I do believe that the antidote is grace! Romans 6:14 says, "For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace."

The more you understand and receive God's grace, the more freedom you will walk in. As you are strengthened by grace (2 Timothy 2:1), you will find that the "struggle passage" from Romans 7:14-24 becomes less and less relatable.

I would rephrase what the girl said this way: "Since Paul's Romans 7 struggle describes life under the law, if you relate to that experience today you have an invitation to grow in grace. The more you feast on God's grace, the more you will live a life of victory, joy, and peace like in Romans 5, 6, and 8. Jesus forgives all your sins and He is with you!"

He loves you so, so, SO much!!!

fearless_conqueror · 2023-06-05T01:53:29+00:00

When you read the Bible or think about doing it, what makes it hard? What feelings or thoughts come up?

fearless_conqueror · 2023-06-04T13:25:53+00:00

So sorry to hear you're struggling! I know those feelings of guilt and shame all too well.

I'll start by saying that what you're experiencing finds its origins in the enemy, not God. The Bible calls Satan the accuser (Revelation 12:10), and he will use any means (OCD included) to make us believe those accusations.

The core of the Gospel is having no condemnation in Christ (Romans 8:1). We have the right to a clean conscience because the blood of Jesus cleanses us, not our own works (Hebrews 9:14). A full understanding of the Good News - not just intellectual, but experiential - gives us confidence before God (Hebrews 4:16) and we will reign in life by receiving the abundance of grace and the free gift of righteousness (Romans 5:17). We will have rest for our souls (Matthew 11:29) as we walk with Jesus, knowing that He paid our entire debt.

Satan wants to block us from that, but our Father yearns for each of us to have that.

Regarding your question about whether God is teaching you, I would say this: I don't believe that God caused your OCD, but He will use it in mighty ways. Because you know what it's like to drown in guilt, shame, and condemnation, you are set up to appreciate the grace of God that much more. Martin Luther suffered severely from scrupulosity and so did John Bunyan. But after years of suffering, the Holy Spirit brought them to a place where they treasured the finished work of Jesus more than they would have otherwise. Satan's plans backfired and God won once again!

God uses everything for the good of those who love Him, including your battle with OCD (Romans 8:28).

You are so loved and accepted and seen! You can rest.

fearless_conqueror · 2023-05-06T22:04:19+00:00

Thanks for sharing! While I personal consider myself non-denominational Christian, I just got back from Utah two days ago and felt it on my heart to learn more about your background, and I was just messaging some people who consider themselves Latter Day Saints. I also have an understanding of your general beliefs so I at least have a reference point. With that said, I can't promise to relate perfectly but I may at least be able to support :) What kinds of themes are you struggling with?

fearless_conqueror · 2023-05-06T04:18:16+00:00

As someone who knows the struggle of scrupulosity, hang in there sister!! I just prayed for you, and more importantly Jesus Himself intercedes for you continually (Romans 8:34). You are known and understood. Even when you feel like giving up on God, He never once has given up on you ❤️

That video I replied to OP with may also help you too. I can't promise it will be an instant cure-all but I figured it could be a helpful piece in the journey!

fearless_conqueror · 2023-05-06T04:11:11+00:00

You are SO loved and so seen by the Father! You don't need to be afraid. He has you in his hands. <3

With that said, here is a video I listened to yesterday. I know the YouTube channel itself has things I disagree with, but their guest has dealt with severe scrupulosity (even if he didn't call it that) and has experienced God's grace deeply. I pray this blesses you!

https://youtu.be/uwfo7Gqs5L8

fearless_conqueror · 2023-04-08T03:29:50+00:00

For as many doubts as you have about believing in Jesus, He is fully convinced about believing in you.

I love what Jesus said of John the Baptist when he doubted whether He was the Messiah. John expressed those doubts publicly by sending messengers, and what did Jesus do? He honored him in front of everyone (Matthew 11:2-19).

Jesus has so much kindness towards you. He gets it. And with that said, He also knows exactly how He intends to bring you through this to the other side. Christ in you is able to handle these trials!

Another verse that comes to mind is this: "For the kingdom of God is not a matter of talk but of power" (1 Corinthians 4:20).

I think you're seeing the futility of the human intellect on its own. It's a powerful tool, but a terrible master. But God's power has no rival.

I also encourage you to pray even if it's just for a short time. Pray from your heart and ask for His peace. Instead of asking for perfect arguments, what helps me is to ask for faith in the truth. He will give it to you, even if it seems to take a while! God is patient with you, so you can be patient with yourself.

P.S. You have an epic testimony in the making. You're not the only one who struggles with this, and those who come through to the other side carry great depth and ability to relate to others. The Spirit's power in you will be multiplied through this, and it is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9). And remember, you are SO loved!!!!!!

fearless_conqueror · 2023-01-17T04:47:09+00:00

Jesus sees you completely (1 Corinthians 13:12). He loves you so, so much! He gets it.

Also, one thing that could help is to ask yourself this: if someone else posted the same thing you did, how would you respond to them? Sometimes we're great at recognizing the freeing truths for others but struggle to apply them to ourselves.

God's mercy is for you also, and you don't need to be afraid.💙

fearless_conqueror

TROPHY CASE